


Scared and Aroused (Discontinued Read Bad Romance from my Works List Instead)

by Sidi



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Bad Decisions, Canon Universe, Denial, Emotional Manipulation, Everyone is LGBT+, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff and Angst, Galra Keith (Voltron), I love the Paladins as a family and team, Keitor, Laith, Lotor is a villain, M/M, Manipulation, Mind Games, Minor Character Death, Multi, Mutual Pining, POV Alternating, Paladin Teamwork, Pining, See first author's note for more explanations, Slow Burn, some violence, supportive friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-11
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-10-30 12:18:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 48,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10876647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sidi/pseuds/Sidi
Summary: After Shiro's disappearance, Keith feels the weight of the world on his shoulders and ends up developing a bad habit that may destroy Voltron itself. He, and the other Paladins, struggle with trying to save the universe especially when Prince Lotor enters the equation. He can't be worse than Zarkon, right?





	1. Epilogue

**Author's Note:**

> I can't believe I am starting a new fic, but here we are. I wanted a fun summer project. This is going to be a bit like a soap opera with some ridiculous moments and also some angsty moments. A few notes about this fic including stuff that may bother people: 
> 
> -Lotor will be a main character and the main villain, but he won't be kidnapping or raping anyone.  
> -I was a bit lost as to what to tag for relationships because some of this is going to be very much like a soap opera. So, I just tagged end game and the other major relationship for now. And yes, Keith will be banging aliens.  
> -The first chapter/epilogue is the only one that will be an episode rewrite  
> -Keith will be flying the black lion for part of this. I promise I have a reason for that.  
> -I love Lance. Like, a lot.  
> -Alternating POV between Lance and Keith though the focus will be slightly more on Keith. I am not ignoring Hunk and Pidge and Allura though. They will play major roles in this.  
> -I do mean slow burn. Do not expect Lance and Keith to be together in two chapters. 
> 
> Anyway, thanks for giving this a shot :)

“Ah, Lance”

“Let them have their fun…”

Keith rolls his eyes as he watches the blue lion take off into the sky. Lance had been all over the tall, attractive alien named Nyma the second he had seen her. Keith is a bit frustrated. He grits his teeth at Lance falling all over the alien and pretends it is just the lack of professionalism that bothers him. He is also annoyed that he is too reserved to flirt so openly with the equally attractive and more his type masculine alien. While Lance plays around with Nyma, Keith helps Shiro question Rolo for information about the battle against Zarkon, only allowing himself a few lingering glances up and down the alien’s tall, lean body and strong forearms. He knows he has to stay focused even if Lance is not though so he mainly follows Shiro’s lead.

As he watches Shiro question the alien, Keith feels a surge of warmth for the other man, his brother in all senses except the traditional one. Shiro had been a grounding presence in his life, someone who helped him after his father disappeared, who guided him to the Garrison. The Kerberos affair had thrown his life into turmoil again and, beyond the lies he knew the Garrison was telling, Keith felt the absence of Shiro keenly.  He is happy to have Shiro back in his life and he doesn’t want to let Shiro or Voltron, or, he supposes, the universe down. He has a purpose now and wants to live up to Shiro’s expectations for him.

Hunk had been sent to find some kind of pipe when Rolo suddenly claims that he needs to check something in his ship. Pidge is busy with Beezer, Allura and Shiro are talking about possible resistance to the Galra Empire, so Keith decides to follow Rolo onto the ship to keep an eye on him.

Keith enters the ship to see Rolo hunched over, looking at his wrist. He vaguely feels that something is wrong and that Rolo is hiding something. He isn’t as adept at reading people as Hunk though so he wonders if this situation calls for patience or immediately throwing Rolo across the ship and demanding answers.

“Good girl,” Rolo murmurs, smiling at his wrist. Keith steps forward, hitting a piece of scrap metal lying across the floor of the ship.

Rolo whirls around quickly, hand in his waistband obviously around a weapon of some sort. Keith held his bayard, not activated, but ready at his side.

“Oh, you scared me. Do you need something, kid?” Rolo’s eyes drag up and down Keith’s body.

Keith would normally be annoyed, but the way Rolo said kid sounded affectionate, almost flirty. Or maybe he is just reading into the tone. He pauses for a second, letting his eyes roll down the alien’s bare chest, wondering what it would feel like to touch it. _Does alien skin feel like human skin?_ Keith wonders.  

Rolo grins in a knowing way and lets go of the hidden weapon at his side.

“So, a paladin of Voltron…pretty important job, huh?”

“Uh, yes, it is.”  

“Probably a lot of pressure knowing the fate of the universe rests on your shoulders.”

Keith doesn’t answer, shoulders tense, staring down the alien.

“And must be pretty lonely though, huh, in a ship with just, what, five or six people?”

“It isn’t lonely. I see them all day.”

“That isn’t the type of lonely I am talking about…” With this, Rolo raises an eyebrow and licks his lips.  

“We are defenders of the universe we don’t have time to worry about that.”

“Of course but I mean, a beautiful man like you must have needs, right?”

Keith glares, mouth downturned in a way that comes off like a pout. There is still something telling him not to let his guard down, but another part of him knows that Rolo is right. He is on edge lately, not only from the last year of trying to track down whatever drew him to the lion in the desert, but also with the responsibilities of being a Paladin. He feels jumpy in his own skin and it has been a long time since he truly felt relaxed.

Keith shakes his head. Shiro would be disappointed in him for even thinking this way, for even briefly considering letting his guard down in this situation.

Rolo begins walking toward him, smiling. Keith grips his bayard, tensing his muscles for a fight.

“Relax,” Rolo murmurs, stepping closer to Keith. He reaches out his hand and gently strokes Keith’s shoulder, calming him much like one would a scared animal.  “When is the last time you had some fun?”

Of course he should shut this down. Of course he should tell Rolo to stop and escort him back outside. Of course he should rejoin Allura and Shiro in discussing plans for defeating Zarkon. Of course. It is his responsibility. It is his duty. It is what Shiro would want.

“It seems the Blue Paladin thinks you guys have enough time to play. I wonder what him and Nyma are doing right now…”

Keith imagines Lance getting lucky in his lion somewhere and having to live with hearing about it for the literal rest of his life. Even if they defeated Zarkon and went their separate ways afterward, somehow Keith would still be hearing about how Lance banged a hot alien girl in his lion. It would be included in Christmas cards and somehow inserted into every conversation. Even if they lost touch with one another (which, Keith thinks is likely-everyone on the ship has more waiting for them at home than Keith. Keith really only has Shiro) Lance would still occasionally send him a postcard about it. He briefly imagines Lance undoing his belt, Nyma giggling in his pilot’s chair. Keith grimaces and looks up at Rolo, allowing a primal part of himself to take over.  

What Lance and the others don’t realize is that Lance isn’t the only one with a sex drive. Lance isn’t the only one who likes pretty aliens. Or, rather, tall strong ones with easygoing smiles and muscles.

Rolo leans his head down like he is going to kiss him, but Keith turns his head and growls. This isn’t about being tender or loving. Keith doesn’t want affection. He wants to get off. His hand still gripping his bayard, he uses his other hand to push Rolo against the ship wall and then rubs his body on the alien’s.

_You need to stop_ , some distant voice tells Keith as he undoes his belt and strokes himself. He discovers that the function of their flight suits that allows an opening for them to piss also works surprisingly well for random quickies with aliens he didn’t know the last name of. If aliens even have last names.

Rolo smirks and pulls out his own dick. It is about what Keith expects-long, light blue, with darker purple spots on it. If they had more time, Keith wouldn’t be opposed to having it in him. But, they don’t-even as he moves closer to Rolo again he can hear Shiro’s voice outside the ship, wondering where Hunk is. He grinds his own crotch against Rolo’s, the bare skin rubbing in a tantalizing way.

When Rolo’s hand reaches for his side again, Keith sneers at him.

“Don’t…don’t move your hands. Put them against the wall. Flat.” He brandishes the bayard at him again.

Rolo grins and does as told and, fuck, Keith thinks that is hot.  

 “You know, if you would put the weapon down we could have a lot more fun.”

“Shut up,” Keith growls

Rolo rolls his hips into Keith’s making Keith groan.

He presses Rolo harder against the wall, loving the friction, loving Rolo’s heat.

Keith licks his hand and then reaches down to grip both of their dicks, still grinding his body into Rolo’s. He keeps his eyes on Rolo’s and his free hand on his bayard. Rolo’s composure finally breaks, swallowing hard, leaning his head back and closing his eyes.  

It is quiet except for their heavy breathing and the occasional whimper made by one or the other. If they listen hard enough, they can hear the others outside.

Keith wonders if he is a pervert as this turns him on even more. He can feel the warmth pooling and he knows he is close. A second later, Rolo comes. Something purple splatters all over Keith’s suit. Keith doesn’t care though. Outside, he can hear Shiro asking where he is and then calling his name and he is gone. He thrusts one, two more times before coming himself.

They sit for a moment, catching their breath. Keith has to admit that he feels more relaxed and clear-headed than he has in weeks.

“Whoa. Kid. That was…intense.”

Keith backs up and groans when he sees just how much Rolo came and how much of it is smeared across his armor.

“Towel?”

It is when he is wiping himself down that he begins to regret his decision. The cum is not like a human’s. It is gritty, like it has sand in it, and Keith struggles to wipe it off. Rolo watches him, smirking.  

“We should probably get going. The big guy is already suspicious of me and probably wouldn’t be too happy with you either right now.”

When they start to walk back outside, Keith makes Rolo go ahead of him, still holding his hand near his bayard.  

“We have touched dicks, kid. You can relax, right?”

“Just being careful.”

Rolo pauses for a moment, looking back at him. “You are an interesting alien.”

They emerge from the ship to see Hunk coming back with the length of pipe needed. Rolo gets back to work on the engine and Keith avoids eye contact with everyone. When Shiro asks him where he was, he says he was supervising Rolo who went onto the ship by himself. Shiro nods approvingly and Keith feels opposite impulses-one full of guilt, one a thrill of dark excitement.

"I think this thing is just about ready for a test flight. Beezer, come co-pilot for me. Be back in a tick."

As they watch Rolo fly off, Keith tunes out Hunk’s worries about something being wrong and imagines what Lance is up to. Keith had already decided that no one will ever know what happened in Rolo’s ship. It had been irresponsible of him as a Paladin of Voltron. He would even have to suck it up if Lance had something to brag about after returning with Nyma. He couldn’t imagine explaining himself, everyone’s faces somewhere between disappointed and confused that he masturbated with a strange alien during a rescue mission. Shiro’s would be the worst though. Keith imagines his downcast face, hand on his shoulder, saying in that voice that only Shiro can do “I am disappointed in you, Keith.”

Keith shudders. He wonders what drove him to do something so irresponsible just for the purpose of getting off. He wants to make Shiro proud of him, to show Shiro that he deserves his trust. A lot is at stake now, more than ever since they jumped into that blue lion in the desert. Keith not living up to expectations could lead to a number of bad consequences. The universe ending is the worst, of course, but that bad end seems distant, impossible. More immediate to Keith are the concerns of letting one of his teammates down, having to watch them die, or even losing Shiro again. He has no idea what he would do without Shiro.  

So, nope. He will die with the secret of what happened in Rolo’s ship. He will avoid sexy aliens in the future. But, Keith concedes to himself, it will make Lance’s bragging easier to bear. At least Keith would know that Lance isn’t the only one that can score with hot aliens around here.

He is brought out of his thoughts when he hears Lance’s voice.    
  
"Guys? Hello? Little help?"


	2. Kryptid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance discovers that Keith's absence is more annoying than his presence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It seems fandom has pretty much accepted that Keith will either cry and crawl into bed with Shiro missing or train himself to death, but this is literally all I can imagine happening with Keith in the wake of Shiro's disappearance.

There is only one last brief moment of peace and calm, stretching and hovering over them like the eye of a storm, before all chaos breaks out after they discover Shiro missing. Pidge is the only quiet one, an unreadable look on her face as she stares at the empty chair. Keith, in what would be hilarious in a different context, acts like Shiro might be playing hide and seek. He looks around the lion’s interior, opening a few random cabinets like Shiro has somehow wedged his massive body inside one of them. Hunk is babbling and looks like he might start crying which, now that Lance thinks about it, is pretty much what he is doing as well.

Allura finally focuses them, telling them to calm down. They run back into the castle’s main control room and Allura opens many screens trying to track his signal in any way possible. Coran is by her side helping her. Hunk sinks back in a chair, looking dazed while Pidge has somehow materialized a device that Lance can only assume could somehow possibly track Shiro. Lance finds himself standing next to Keith, doomed to watch and wait.

“I’m going to go fly around and look for him,” Keith says, interrupting the momentary silence.

“Keith, you know that won’t work,” Allura responds without even turning around to look at him.

“What if he just somehow fell out and we left him back there.”

“The Black Lion wouldn’t have let that happen. And even if it had Shiro would have said something.”

“But, what if he was unconscious? What if we just left him out there…”

“I would be able to track him through his suit if he was just floating in space.”

“Keith, stop. Even if he did fall out there is no way you would just be able to fly around and find him. He could be anywhere,” Lance pipes in, unable to keep irritation out of his voice.

“No, he would be where we just were…” Keith’s voice sounds thin and wavering.

“Before a wormhole jump that we wouldn’t even be able to do again right now,” Allura says.  

“Well, I have to try.”

“If he is just in space, I will be able to track him. I understand how you feel but Lance is right.  Just give us some time.”

Lance turns to gloat, unable to turn it off even in a moment like this, but stops when he sees Keith’s face. Sometimes he forgets that Shiro means more to Keith than the rest of them.

The question of what they are going to do to find Shiro is complicated by the increasing fuzziness that Lance feels in his head. He feels exhausted and not the type of exhausted that usually comes after battle. He is usually tired, but keyed up after a battle, but now his body feels heavy and his mind slow. He struggles to focus on what people are saying or doing around him. At first, he thinks it is just him, but he sees Pidge struggling to keep her eyes open, Keith smothering a yawn, Hunk leaning further and further down in his seat into a more comfortable position.

“Ok, I know we are all worried about Shiro, but you all will need to go to bed,” Coran finally says.

“But…” Keith says before getting cut off.

“The quintessence-sucking blast you sustained sapped you for more than just that moment. Though not fatal, your bodies and life forces will require you to rest soon. I know everyone wants to find Shiro now, but Allura and I will continue to search while you recover. Now, off to bed.” Coran starts to shoo them away.  

Lance feels frustrated even as his body feels heavier and heavier. He desperately wants to stay awake and there is a nagging feeling that if Shiro were here he would find a way to battle through a witchcraft quintessence sapping and look for a missing teammate anyway. But, it is fighting a losing battle. He realizes that if he continues to fight it, he will likely just pass out on the ground. He can barely drag himself back to his room, barely registering that Pidge and Hunk are doing the same. He figures Keith would do something stupid like fight it and end up asleep on the ground in a hallway somewhere or maybe in the middle of the training deck. Not Lance’s problem.

He curls up into bed, for once not even thinking about his skin care routine, and goes to sleep dreaming of home. Bright skies, the sun, flip flops on concrete, the shades of the ocean, sand beneath his feet, warmth…

**********

Lance jerks awake in what he assumes is the next day feeling better than he has in a long time. He races outside, hoping that yesterday was just a dream except for the defeating Zarkon part. He finds no one in the dining hall or lounge area.  

He finds the Princess in the main control room first who tells him, with a grim smile, that there is still no sign of Shiro and not even an idea of how to look for him. Nothing traceable is showing up. She is confused and reading through some Altean book for clues.

Lance looks for the other Paladins, finding Pidge first. She is hunched over a computer, typing a million miles a minute. She smiles at him when he appears, but has the same story as Allura. No idea where he is. No way to track him, currently. He can tell she is busy working up some plan though and he feels a rush of gratitude for his small, smart friend.

He finds Hunk standing outside the black lion. They have a brief conversation where Hunk wonders if the Black Lion is the main clue here and that maybe they can trace Shiro through that somehow. But, the black lion not only appears completely shut down, but has also put up its force field in the middle of the night. Lance feels a pinch in his chest. This doesn’t seem like a good sign to him.

He goes to the training deck to find Keith and is surprised to find the deck empty and dark. Lance is sure he would find him here, destroying gladiator bots to escape from his feelings. The only other option is Keith’s room, which Lance also finds empty and dark. Lance feels a stab of worry. He runs back through his morning journey and asks each person if they had seen Keith since last night. No one has.  

Lance looks everywhere that Keith could be, worry growing steadily in his stomach. He checks the lions and pods and finds none of them missing. He can’t control rapid fire thoughts of worry from entering his brain though. What if Keith had somehow fallen asleep somewhere dangerous in the ship? Maybe Lance should have made sure he got back to his room safely. Or, what if Keith had tried to go back to find Shiro and disappeared in the same manner as Shiro when he entered the red lion? What if there was some kind of weird lion virus that is disappearing Paladins, one by one? What if the lions are haunted? He runs back to the main control room, seeking out Allura. 

“Allura, Keith is gone too.”

“What?” She doesn’t turn to look at him.  

“I can’t find him.”

“Lance…”

Allura sighs and waves her hand over a device.

“He is in the castle. I can see his signal.” She points.  

“Oh.”

“Lance.” Allura looks tired, but her eyes are kind. “Keith thinks of Shiro as a brother. This is probably hard for him. He probably just needs some time to himself.”

And Lance understands this. Keith is a good teammate, but had the same loner tendencies that Pidge has sometimes. They are both people who can spend time alone and not go crazy. Lance likes the occasional quiet night by himself, but in general he thrives on social contact. Right now, he wants to be with his team rather than alone, but he understands that Keith might have different impulses.

This initial understanding, which Lance pats himself on the back for having, slowly morphs into a small flame of annoyance that grows until it reaches downright anger over the course of the next few days.

After eating breakfast and on the way to find Pidge again, he finds the red jacket, that red jacket, on the ground in a hallway. He places it in the dining room area, figuring that Keith might be sleeping somewhere else, but definitely still needs to eat.

Lance visits the whole team again, Hunk and Pidge working together now, Allura and Coran still in the main control room. It is less than an hour later when he wanders back to the dining room area, finding a dirty bowl that hadn’t been there before and the jacket gone.

The next day, he sees a door shut in the training deck where he knows no one else would be. He grits his teeth, running to try to catch Keith, but there is no one there when he races through the door himself.

Their rooms are next to each other and Lance can’t keep himself from going into Keith’s room that night. There is nothing in there. He decides to be nice, again, and puts a plate of Hunk’s cookies in there. Hunk had somehow found time to cook and work on finding Shiro.

The next day, he enters Keith’s room again and finds just the dirty plate with a few crumbs laying across it. Lance grips the plate and tells himself to be patient.

He casually brings Keith up to Pidge enough that she shows him a picture of Keith captured on security cameras to assure Lance that Keith is fine. The picture is blurry and bad quality, but Lance concedes that the figure darting across the hallway is likely Keith.

Later that day, he catches a glimpse of red disappearing behind a corner. He runs after it, calling out Keith’s name, but no one is there when he turns the corner.

“Doesn’t it just bug you, Hunk?”

“Dude, Keith is probably going through some shit right now.”

“We all are, but we are all trying to…figure this out. You, Pidge, Allura, Coran, and I’m…”

Lance realizes he isn’t helping much. He doesn’t have the hacker abilities or mechanical abilities of Pidge or Hunk. He doesn’t have the knowledge of the universe and Voltron that Allura and Coran have. He is a pilot and a great shot. He wants to fly something or shoot down a ship or go on a mission. If Shiro was being held prisoner somewhere, he would be the first (ok, the second after Keith) to volunteer to infiltrate the ship and get him back. These qualities seem useless in the face of finding a missing teammate though. But, he is trying. He checks in with everyone else sporadically, letting them bounce ideas off him, bringing them a drink or food if needed.

“I’m at least trying.”

“Are you worried about Keith?”

“No, I am worried about Shiro. Keith can go shove himself in a wormhole.”

Hunk smiles at him.

“Maybe you should find Keith? Make sure he is eating?”

Lance takes the hint and leaves to look for Keith again, the elusive Keith, the person who currently feels as absent as Shiro to Lance.

He is somewhat lost as to where to look though. He has no idea where Keith would be. Lance is pretty sure he isn’t staying in his room or the training deck, his usual spaces from before. He wanders the castle for a while, whistling, wondering if he should go check in with Pidge again when he hears something that makes him stop. He hears Allura’s voice behind one of the doors and not in the main control room. She is in a side room that Lance can’t ever remember entering. Lance doesn’t just freeze because of Allura’s voice though. He also hears the distinctive other voice speaking to her. He immediately walks up to the door and tries to open it, but it is locked. In frustration, he leans his head against the door.

In the room, it is definitely Allura and Keith speaking.

Several emotions hit him at once-relief, jealousy, and then finally back to anger. Keith is fine to speak to the Princess, but can’t even have breakfast with his team? Can’t even respond to Lance when he knows Keith had to have heard him calling his name at least once?  

He feels only a smidge of shame as he leans in further and presses his ear against the door. He can’t quite hear what is being said though. He is disturbed when the talking stops and no one comes out though. He imagines Keith hugging Allura, comforting her. He pictures her laying her head on his shoulder and Keith stroking her back, murmuring comforting words. He feels somewhat queasy at the thought, rubbing his hands down the door, bile rising in his throat.

It is later that night when Allura calls for a meeting between all the paladins. She specifically asks them to go to the room beside the main control room which looks like a conference room to Lance. Before he enters the room, Lance idly wonders if Keith will even bother to show up. He is surprised to see that Keith is already in the room before the rest of the paladins, standing next to Allura and Coran in front of a very large screen that seems to be obscuring something behind it.

It is also immediately obvious that he has not showered or possibly slept since Shiro’s disappearance. His hair is standing up like he had run his hands through it one too many times. Lance can smell him from a few feet away. His eyes are blood shot and he looks greasy, greasier than normal. Lance dispels the picture of Allura and Keith hugging behind that closed door. There is no way that Allura would have allowed Keith anywhere near her looking and smelling like that.  

Keith has his arms crossed over his chest and he is looking at the ground, pointedly avoiding eye contact as the others file in. Pidge finally shuffles in and stands next to Lance while Hunk is on his other side.

“I know you are probably wondering why I have asked you to be here. Keith, why don’t you take over?”

“Yes, Keith, why don’t you explain why you have been avoiding everyone?” Lance borderline wishes he could take the words back. All it takes is one look at Keith to realize that he wasn’t exactly taking a vacation for the last few days. He looks wrecked.

Keith flinches a bit.

“Sorry I have been…absent lately. I don’t deal well with stuff like this and…”

“But you dealt well enough to have secret meetings with the Princess?”

Lance tries to make his tone light, like he is just teasing. He doesn’t quite achieve light and teasing though. He sees Pidge look away and Hunk look at him sympathetically. He knows he sounds jealous.  

Allura looks confused.

“Uh, by secret meetings do you mean Keith appearing out of nowhere looking like a…” Allura pauses here, glancing at Keith and noticing Coran’s gentle head shake in her direction. She clears her throat before continuing. “and asking for corkboard and string and then running away afterward? What even **is** a “corkboard”?”

Keith crosses his arms over his chest tighter.

“Corkboard and string?” Pidge asks, a hint of amusement in her voice.

“Ok, just let me explain. So, I can’t do some of the stuff that you guys do…”

 _That Pidge, Hunk, Allura, and Coran do_ , Lance’s mind supplies him.

“So I did what I do know and that is organizing information.”

He pulls the large screen out of the way and what sits before them is three separate, smaller screens much like the ones that Allura brings up when running castle functions. The middle one has a crudely drawn picture of Zarkon somehow attached to it. On the actual screen, there are bits of information laid out across the surface-one section about Zarkon’s ship, the other about the black lion. There is another that has Haggar and then a lot of empty space that only has three question marks above it. There is also the word “Britain” written in block letters, large at the top.

The screen to the right has an equally crudely drawn picture of Shiro taped above it. Then, similarly, sections with information below it. This one also has a black lion and another section that just says astral projection.  

The one to the left has an image of Matt and Sam Holt, somehow taken from what appears to be their Garrison IDs taped above it. The sections are sparse for this board, only containing a section about the arena and the most recent security footage that Pidge had found.

Pidge gasps when she sees it all.

“Ok, you are going to have to explain this,” Hunk says.

Keith takes a deep breath.

“This is so we can organize our information. We all have strengths and weaknesses and we aren’t always working together all the time or working at the same time. This is a way for us to keep on the same page even if we aren’t directly working in the same room.”

He walks over to the screens.

“This one is for the Holts. We have put finding them on the backburner at times…Pidge, it is ok, you know we have. With Zarkon not being a direct threat at the moment, I think we need to support Pidge here. So, we can find Shiro and the Holts and work toward those goals together.”

Pidge nods.

“This one is for finding Shiro.”

“Did you draw that? Oh man, I am never going to let you live this down.” Lance says. Keith gives him a dirty look.

“You know, we do have security footage and pictures of him too. Just saying.” Allura says.

“I like to draw sometimes, back off! Now, the middle screen…”

“Seriously, you drew Zarkon too? You even got the details on his armor correctly, holy shit.” Lance can’t stop himself.

Keith discreetly flips him off.

“Why do you have Britain written on this board?” Pidge asks, interrupting their moment.  

“What is a “Britain”?” Allura asks.

“Britain is…ok, just let me explain this.” Keith runs his hands through his hair, making it stick up like two devil horns.  If he didn’t look so close to having a breakdown, Lance would have laughed or made fun of him.

“Britain is like the Galra Empire for Earth.”

Allura gasps.

“Wait, I mean, maybe not exactly”

“Well, they did forcibly colonize almost all of Earth at one point,” Hunk muses.

“And the slave trade and destroying areas for their resources.” Pidge supplies.

“It seriously wasn’t until pretty recently in history that Britain no longer had any colonized land,” Lance adds.

“But like, other countries were terrible too and not all of Britain is or was bad, but I guess you could say the same for the Galra too…”

Allura still looks confused.

“So how does this help us?” Hunk says, clearly trying to focus Keith’s rambling.  

“Ok.” Keith appears to gather himself. “So the British Empire lasted for like, hundreds of years. Can you name the ruler who died that ended the empire?”

“You can’t really trace it to one person like that,” Pidge says.

“Exactly.”

“Ok, why the history lesson?” Lance says.  

“We thought defeating Zarkon would be it. I don’t think so though. He has had 10,000 years to establish an empire. Galra have spread everywhere. Haggar is still around. His top commanders are still around. It isn’t like the death of Zarkon killed the Galran empire. I think we still have work to do there even with Zarkon out of the picture.”

“That unfortunately makes sense,” Allura says.

“So, I see this as the three main…goals. Or areas that Voltron needs to focus on. Find Shiro. Find the Holts. Continue to bring peace to a universe still being ruled under the Galran empire. And I know…that some of you want to leave and were excited when we defeated Zarkon because of that.”

The air becomes heavier. Lance is suddenly transported to a different time and place, something that feels so far away now, laughing children, broad open skies, frozen yogurt on hot afternoons. Yes, Lance wants to leave.

“Pidge.” Keith looks directly at her.  “I know you want to find your family and that sometimes being in Voltron has held you back from doing that. But, I hope that you will stay with us. I can’t even tell you how many missions have succeeded just because of your help. I also hope that we can help you find your family.”

“Duh, do you think I would jump ship now? Matt would kick my ass if I abandoned Shiro. Plus, being a part of Voltron helps me find clues.”

Keith nods, smiling at her.  

“Hunk.” Keith turns his attention to the boy standing beside Lance. “I am sure you would rather go home now, but we need you here. Your fire power and mechanical abilities are one thing, but we also need you as a friend. I can’t imagine forming Voltron without you.”

“Of course. Plus, there are other reasons I am not in a hurry to leave space,” he scratches his chin and smiles.  

Pidge grins at him.

“His girlfriend!”

“Pidge!”

Keith finally looks at Lance, but not quite. His eyes settle on Lance’s chest rather than his eyes.

“Lance. You have a big family and loads of friends and a really great life back at home and probably miss Earth more than anyone else on here. I understand if you want to leave.”

There are several moments of silence. Lance feels a sinking feeling in his gut. It is true, but Keith seems a lot less intent on keeping Lance in Voltron than the other two. I understand if you want to leave? Is that it?  

“But, Voltron and this ship wouldn’t be the same without you,” Keith falters, looking lower, at the ground in front of Lance’s feet.  

“Why?”

“Because you are Lance and…”

Lance is annoyed. He opens his mouth to argue when he feels Pidge tug on his sleeve.

“You aren’t really considering leaving, are you?”

Lance looks down at her and then at Hunk and finally to Allura and Coran. They all look genuinely sad at the idea that he might leave. Except maybe Keith, who is still staring at the ground and stumbling over his words.  

“Guys, I do miss home, but you think I would leave Shiro hanging somewhere? Or that I would ignore the Gal-British Empire still out there? Come on. I’m in.”

Keith finally looks him in the eyes, smiling.  

At this, Keith drags over what looks like a weird, alien version of a whiteboard.

“I think we can use this to write notes or questions or ideas. That way, we can organize what has been tried or what needs to be tried or any progress we make. Anyone can come in here at any time and review information or write notes or questions…just whatever. And that is all I have. Again, I’m…I didn’t mean to disappear. This is just all I know how to do in this situation.”

Lance’s anger toward Keith earlier drains. In some ways, he and Keith aren’t really that different in that they probably both feel more comfortable flying something and hitting enemies compared to tracing information through the intergalactic version of the internet. And it isn’t a bad idea to organize and lay out ideas in such a manner. Keith is just doing what he knows, same as Lance these last few days.

Lance steps forward, ready to demand Keith take a shower (because seriously) when Allura interrupts him.   

“There is also a matter that Shiro discussed with me before he…when he was still here.”

They look at her, confused.

“He said in the case that he cannot, that Keith should lead Voltron and fly the black lion.”

There is a very long moment of silence. Lance’s first feeling is one of bleak finality-Keith entering the black lion seems like admitting Shiro isn’t coming back.

Plus, Keith, leading him? Leading the entire team?

He looks at Hunk and Pidge, trying to gauge their responses. Pidge looks sad. Hunk has a carefully neutral face.

“Listen, I know I am not Shiro and I don’t even really…want or think I am qualified to lead. I did pilot the black lion once though and I think the black lion might be key to finding Shiro. We also do need a point person so…”

He trails off again, looking at Allura. She smiles and nods. Lance clenches his fist.

“I think it also helps to have someone we can call the leader, the military leader so to speak while I am the royal leader and Coran our advisor. I would not advise us admitting that we are leader-less,” Allura adds. 

Keith is deliberately not making eye contact with anyone and Lance battles competing impulses-one to support him, one to say something spiteful and mean.

“It’s fine. But, are we going to try to form Voltron? Who will fly Red?” Pidge says.

Keith looks at Allura.

“I am going to try to get into the red lion,” she says. “However, my odds would be better…”

“In Blue,” Lance supplies for her. “But then…” Lance feels a growing sickness in his stomach. What if they wanted to put Allura in Blue? Would he no longer be a Paladin? Maybe he **should** just go home.

“Maybe Lance could try the red lion?” Hunk says. Lance glares at him. He hadn’t even considered it. He imagines settling into the red lion’s cockpit and it feels wrong.  

“That is a possibility.” Keith sighs.  “But, really, we need to see what happens. Maybe Red will accept Allura. Maybe Black will want one of you over me or none of us. Maybe another Paladin will drop out of the sky. Maybe Shiro will show up tomorrow and laugh at how much we stressed out over him. We just have to try though. We have to do our best. For Shiro.”

“And for the universe,” Allura adds.

Lance is startled to see that Keith is looking directly at him. He is chewing his lower lip and his exhausted eyes are pleading.  

Lance sighs. Part of him wants to be an ass. Part of him feels a pinch in his chest when he sees Keith standing up there with Allura and Coran. In some ways, they feel so far out of reach, so far ahead of Lance. But, he also sees the almost imperceptible tremble in Keith’s shoulders and the surprisingly vulnerable look in his eyes.

“Ok, that’ll do pig. Having information boards is a good idea. I think Pidge and Hunk already have stuff to add. We can worry about the lions tomorrow,” Lance says, walking over to Keith and grabbing his elbow gently.   

“Tomorrow?” Keith says, questioning.

“Yes, because you reek. Seriously, do you even realize that we are in the same room as a Princess right now? And you look like shit. You are taking a shower, eating something, and then going to bed. In the morning, we can look at all of our information again and maybe see if Black even lets you in her again. Ok?”

Keith looks like he wants to argue for a moment before reconsidering and nodding. He thanks Allura and Coran for her help and says goodbye to Pidge and Hunk who are already working on the boards. Then, he allows Lance to lead him out of the room. As they are leaving, Lance happens to glance at the bottom of the Shiro screen that had been partially obstructed by where he was standing. At the very bottom is a poorly drawn picture of 5 people, colored with what looks like marker in the colors of black, red, blue, yellow, and green.

Lance can’t find it in his heart to make fun of Keith for it. Instead, he smiles at him, walking faster, ready to take care of his idiotic teammate.

 _So,_ Lance thinks as he leads Keith to the showers. **_This_** _is our fearless new leader?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Chapter: A lead on Shiro, a strange new world, and Keith trying really, really hard
> 
>  
> 
> Inspired by this photo/fan art lol
> 
> [Keith Sightings](https://keithsightings.tumblr.com/post/157426773963)
> 
>  
> 
> Also, check out this tumblr for a lot of fun cryptid pics of Keith that I had no idea existed! 
> 
> Also, yes, I tried to make Keith like the conspiracy board guy and the aliens guy
> 
> [Conspiracy Board Guy](https://memegenerator.net/Charlie-Day-Conspiracy)
> 
> [Aliens Guy](http://www.livememe.com/5o4mnkx)


	3. Cotton Candy Worries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith over-thinks everything and they go on their first Shiro-less mission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why does Keith always go angstier than I intend for him to be?

When Keith lays down that night for bed, freshly showered and full of food goo, his thoughts immediately settle on the blue paladin laying not that far away in his own room located next to Keith’s. He had been so sure that Lance would leave after Zarkon had been defeated. He had seen Lance’s huge, loving family during the mind melds. He knows that people like Lance, that he has friends, that he is loved.  He had always sensed that Earth is home for Lance beyond just literally being his home. It wasn’t just a planet Lance lived on, but a _home._

Keith didn’t adequately verbalize to Lance that he wants Lance to feel the same way about the Castle and Voltron, that they love him and need him too. In a more general sense, a part of Keith hopes that it feels like a home to the others just like it had started to feel like home to him. He isn’t always the best at communication especially when he has to get sappy. He doesn’t know how to communicate, exactly, how much Voltron means to him and, on some level, he understands that the others probably don’t feel the same because they have actual homes.

Nevertheless, he feels like he successfully communicated to Pidge and Hunk how much Voltron (and Keith) need them. He didn’t succeed with Lance though.

He rolls over, annoyed that everything with Lance has to be hard. Why had it been harder to just tell Lance that Voltron (and Keith) needs him?

It isn’t true that everything is hard with Lance though. Lance is his friend and the bickering had long lost its bite. It just isn’t as easy, for some reason, to be at ease with Lance like he is with the others. Keith had clicked with Hunk almost immediately. He is comfortable with Hunk and they work so well together whether cleaning the kitchen or going on missions. Pidge is like his weird, genius little sister that he adores and he knows adores him back even if she makes fun of him for being “emo” sometimes.

It isn’t exactly like he is uncomfortable around Lance though. Lance is a great team member and, additionally, a fun person to be around. Sometimes Lance is like a brother to Keith, annoying at the same time as irreplaceable.

But, still. There is something else there too. Keith always feels this extra bit of energy coursing underneath his skin when it comes to Lance. Like, he can’t completely relax, can’t completely let his guard down. Which, frustrates Keith.

Of course, these thoughts are only a buffer, safely keeping him from other sources of worry that make his stomach churn with anxiety.

_Allura_. Allura is amazing. She is better than any other Princess (mostly fictional of course) that Keith has ever known. A fierce warrior in addition to a great leader. He would honestly be fine with her taking over the black lion. She stirs a natural urge in Keith to protect her, a soldier to the princess even if she can fight as well as any of them. Or maybe even better, if Keith is being honest.

Keith wonders if she really is fine with him now. They had hugged and made up. She had helped him with his space conspiracy boards. But, deep down, what did she see when she looks at him?

A friend? A comrade? A tool? A Galra?

Keith sometimes finds himself looking in his mirror after the trials of Marmora and wondering what he really sees in himself now. He looks the same. Maybe a little older, a little more tired. But, human. Except, his eyes are a strange color. He had always enjoyed the compliments he received about his uniquely colored eyes, knowing they are one of his best features. He isn’t an attention whore by nature, but everyone likes a little bit here and there.

Now, they seem like a glaring sign throughout his entire life that he didn’t quite fit in and never will. That there is something else coursing through his veins, lurking beneath the surface.

He tries not to think about it. He tries not to wonder where his parents are or even who they really are. He tries not to think about how the blue lion landed on Earth. A part of him wants to find his family and origins. It is what he told everyone he would do when Zarkon was defeated and Voltron could disband. It seems like a natural next step. Lance wants to go back to Earth. Pidge wants to look for her family.

_I guess I could look for mine_ , Keith recalls himself saying.

It isn’t that he doesn’t want to at all. He just knows that whatever he finds out might not be pleasant. There is no guarantee that what he learns will be puppies and kittens and everything warm and nice. Something tells him that he may be better off not knowing.

There is another part of him that feels sick at the thought of the universe not needing Voltron anymore. It means so much to Keith. These strange people (and aliens) that feel like family to him. Being able to be around Shiro all the time. The purpose that Voltron brings him.  

He belongs here. Doesn’t he? If not here, then where and with whom?

It is a sick, selfish desire though. He knows that everyone wants to go home, to their actual _homes_ with their actual _families_. They don’t belong here like he does. Voltron is not a home, but a temporary job to them.  

He tosses over onto his other side, curling his arms around himself. He is exhausted and tries desperately to avoid his spiraling thoughts from going further. He isn’t like this all the time, of course. He considers himself a generally stable person. Up until recently, he had a dad who he loved and Shiro and a career path that excited him.

Everything had been thrown into the air starting with his dad’s disappearance. Then Shiro’s first disappearance. Then Shiro’s second disappearance and the knowledge of his weird, Galra blood. Keith feels unstable now, vulnerable, emotional in ways that he isn’t used to feeling. He can’t always find a way to center himself like Shiro taught him to do when his dad disappeared.  

Trying to keep his thoughts at bay is a losing battle.

He remembers a reoccurring dream he had when he was a child where someone cradles him in their arms. He must have been very young if someone was holding him in their arms. He can’t remember the person’s face or what they look like. He can just remember how it felt safe in their arms, being rocked back and forth.

He had stopped having the dream as a teenager. Then, it came to him again a few days after Marmora. This time, the arm around his back looked purple. The person had murmured in his ear too, for the first time. Only one word.  

_Akira_

Keith isn’t sure what the dream is supposed to mean. Pre-Voltron, he had always assumed that the dream was his way of providing comfort to himself. He was never a touchy feely person like others, but maybe some part of him wanted to be. Post-Voltron Keith wonders if there is more to it. He wonders who Akira is. He wonders if the arm is really purple or not. 

Even these worries are only another layer of buffer. Allura possibly still hating him, his Galra blood, his origins, all of that seems to pale in significance compared to the dominating and most immediate worry in his life.

_Shiro_

Shiro is his anchor, basically the only family he has left. He can’t believe that he lost him again. This time is even worse because if Keith had performed better, fought better, been a little faster, then maybe Shiro wouldn’t have disappeared. Kerberos had been something out of his control. This wasn’t though. Shiro and complete victory had been so close only to slip through his fingers at the last moment.   

Worse yet is Shiro dumping Voltron on him. Keith can’t help but think that he will only be a poor shadow of Shiro, embarrassingly lacking, unable to hold the young team together. How could he expect to not only make decisions, but also make the others follow him? How could he live up to Shiro’s expectations?

The only solution Keith had to this issue is to not live up to Shiro’s expectations, not really. He would find Shiro, and be perfectly happy falling into place by his side, being his right hand man only, and never anything more.

He finally falls asleep that night, gripping his sheets tightly, thinking of blue eyes and black lions.

**********

He wakes up to a knock on the door and wonders just how much he overslept.

“Keith?” He hears Hunk calling out.

“Yes?” he answers.

“Allura wants us all to meet in the main control room. I think she has news of some sort.”

Keith gets dressed faster than ever, darting to the main control room. He thinks it may be about Shiro. He hopes it is Shiro. Part of him hopes that Shiro is actually there though he knows it is way more likely that it is just news or a possible lead.

He can tell from Allura’s guarded facial expression that it won’t be great news. He deflates and watches as the others trickle into the room after him.

“Paladins, I know we were going to test the lions today, but another matter has cropped up that I think we should attend to immediately. There is a distress signal on a planet that houses the Zerfians. They are good allies, but more importantly are known for their understanding of the astral world. I believe they may be able to help us, if we help them. I have already made contact with Sepash, their leader.”

“Let’s do it,” Keith says, perking up at the mention of a possible way to find information about Shiro.

“But will we need Voltron?” Pidge says.

“I have reason to believe that we may be able to do this without forming Voltron. We will take it slowly though,” Allura responds.  

Keith looks at Lance, already considering the gross joke he would make about Allura’s words of “taking it slowly” or maybe about how he is such a great pilot that they wouldn’t need Voltron.  He is surprised when Lance seems distant and quiet though. Keith frowns, but doesn’t have much time to think about it before they are flying to the planet.  

On the way to the planet, Allura fills them in a bit on the situation. Keith only listens in bits and pieces, anxious that he will be expected to lead or be strong and encouraging or whatever Shiro usually did on missions. He picks up on a few key words that seem important.

_Gelatinous beings._

_Peaceful._

_Terrified and nearly wiped out by Galra._

_Food problems._

_Galra may be on planet._

Once they land, Keith hopes that he hasn’t missed anything important.

There are three aliens waiting for them when they do land. Keith is momentarily struck by the sight of the aliens. They remind him of the water aliens from _The Abyss_ , an old movie that he used to watch with his dad.   

They look like they are made from water, but not entirely. They look more solid, almost like jello and they are just a bit shiny and smooth for water. Even as they walk up to the strange, viscous aliens, Keith can see they have some range of flexibility though. They are round and small at first, but as they approach, the aliens seem to grow taller, meeting Allura and the Paladins at eye level. One in the middle is the biggest one and takes a shape that reminds Keith of a Christmas tree. The water flows downward in tiers. The other to his right takes on a similar form, except smaller and shorter. The final alien to the middle one’s left can’t seem to decide which form to take, becoming a perfect sphere before taking on a shape that looks surprisingly like one of them in their armor before settling on a vaguely human shape with a generic human face.  

“Sepash, it is an honor to meet you.” Allura bows, smiling at the main one, the one that remains the tallest.

“Same to you, Princess Allura. Let me introduce you to my advisor, Stokes, and my child, Frozaki.”

Both bow, sort of, to their group. Keith is fascinated by the way the water, or whatever it is, flows yet somehow keeps its shape at the same time. He feels himself being elbowed by Lance and realizes that Allura has just introduced them all, including Keith as the leader of Voltron.

“Oh uhm, hi. It’s an honor to be here?”

He hears Pidge snort and he refuses to look at Lance or Hunk.

He holds out his hand. It is a reflex and he realizes even as he does it that hand-shaking is not universal, apparently. But, his hand is already out there, hanging in the air, and he wishes he could sink into the ground like he assumes the Zerfians can.

“Oh!” Frozaki says. “Father, this is a weird custom some aliens have. I read about it in a book. It is supposed to be friendly and respectful. But also to form agreements.”

Sepash and Stokes nod (or, at least, the water ripples up and down in what Keith feels like would be a nod).

Then, Frozaki slides up and slaps Keith’s hand. It doesn’t hurt-rather, it feels like a small wave hitting his hand. The Zerfian in front of him looks pleased.

Sepash and Stokes do the same and Keith sends a silent look of gratitude to Frozaki.

“Yes, it is an agreement. We will help you with whatever issue you are having. You have our word as defenders of the universe.” The words feel stiff and wooden in his mouth and he, again, refuses to look at any of the others. Allura does touch his arm briefly in what Keith recognizes as a reassuring touch.

The aliens want to take them to a meeting room to debrief them. Keith takes in the weird settlement around him as they walk (and slide) through the town. The ground is marshy, like a swamp. Some of the Zerfians wade through it comfortably. In what would be roads or sidewalks, the species had what Keith can only see as water slides. The buildings look like some weird combination of water slides and bounce houses. One path dips down into a hill and Keith briefly considers how much fun it would be to slide down it.

However, a moment later a puddle on the ground suddenly morphs and becomes a tree-like Zerfian right next to Hunk. Hunk screams and basically jumps into Lance’s arms.

Ok, so maybe no sliding because any puddle might be a Zerfian, Keith notes to himself.  

The settlement itself is very small with most of the view being the wide open spaces of the planet. It isn’t entirely different from some Earth landscapes. It is a mostly flat world with a swampy ground and a few trees dotting the land. The colors of the planet look off though. Everything looks slightly more pastel than it should be. The marshy ground is not the muted greens and browns that Keith remembers, but a weird and vivid pastel version of green and brown. Everything looks textured incorrectly as well, almost looking like the brushstrokes of a painting. It is both beautiful and confusing to Keith’s eyes.  

Spreading across the strange trees are gobs of flowing…something. The substance is pale pink and yellow and only serves to add to the surrealist feeling of the place. It looks like cotton candy to Keith. Big deposits of cotton candy fluttering gently on the branches of the alien trees.  

As Keith examines the place, the alien named Frozaki falls next to him, solidifying their form, two legs emerging that remind Keith of his own.

“So you are the leader of Voltron?” the alien starts.

Keith winces and then hopes it does not show on his face. “Yes, I am,” he answers, praying he sounds confident.

“Wow, that’s so cool!”

“Uh.” Keith doesn’t know how to respond. At the moment, it does not feel cool. It feels horrible.

“Call me Fro by the way.”

“Fro…”

A watery hand grips his bicep. Keith tenses up.

“Humans are so interesting. You are human right? I watched a documentary about you one time.”

“A documentary?”

“Yah. It says you are mostly water, but if you are mostly water why do you look so...firm?” The hand squeezes his bicep.

“Uh, I don’t know…”

“I like it though.”

“What?”

“How firm you are.” A smile appears across Fro’s face and the water hand rubs up and down his arm.  

“Uh…”

Keith’s mind can’t quite keep up with what is happening. He is worried about the mission. He is concerned about the possible Galra on the planet. He is disorientated by the weird brush-stroke painting colors and textures of the planet. He is trying not to slip on the water slide tubing beneath his feet. And now this.

_Am I being flirted with?_

Keith looks at Fro and one of their generic watery human eyes winks at him. He winks back, not thinking, and turns his head when Fro looks delighted.

Mercifully, they reach the meeting hall soon afterward. It looks like a normal meeting hall though much of it is made out of the same water slide material. Sepash tells them that structures built for Zerfians are uncomfortable for most other beings in the universe so they created a more universal one for when they have guests. Keith nods, noting that the Zerfians balance on top of and inside giant vases while Allura and the Paladins get huge, fluffy pink and yellow chairs. A bit strange for a political meeting, but better than being given a vase or water slide he supposes. He also wonders if the chairs are made out of the cotton candy on the trees.

Keith allows Allura to do most of the talking. It feels so wrong somehow, being here without Shiro. He has done solo missions and missions with only a few Paladins before and not the entire team, but it still feels wrong. He looks at Lance, Pidge, Hunk, and Allura and senses that something fundamental is missing from the picture. That they are not whole without Shiro.  

Sepash explains their problem and it seems like a very insignificant and, to be frank, boring one to Keith except for the fact that they suspect a Galra presence on the planet.

Apparently, Zerfians eat one type of fish as their main source of nourishment. The fish had suddenly, as in almost overnight, started showing up in much smaller numbers. Zerfians have sensitive systems and really cannot supplement with other forms of food. To Keith, it sounds like maybe they overfished their supply, but he won’t say that.

The fish come in a big river that flows through the settlement and right by a big processing center that processes the fish and water. The river itself had quite suddenly died down to a stream instead of a river.

The Zerfians themselves wanted to look for the possible issue by going upriver to see what might be the problem, but their astral scans picked up on a Galran signal. The species was almost annihilated by the Galra. They are desirable for multiple purposes by Galra leaders. Keith senses the tension in this statement. They did not want to chance capture by leaving the safety of the settlement, but their food supply is dipping low. They had very little to no natural defenses except maybe turning into puddles, but the Galra had even found a way to counter that strategy.  

Allura nods throughout, asking follow up questions and looking like a Princess…no, a Queen actually, Keith thinks to himself.

“So,” Sepash says. “Will you help us?”

“Of course,” Allura answers.

“Stokes?”

“We will help you with the astral plane as well.”

“So, what is your plan, Leader of Voltron?” Sepash asks.

Keith jerks up, realizing that it is his turn to talk. He briefly considers how Shiro would say “we will kick Galra ass and then get your damn fish back” in a way that sounds smart and leader-like.

“Well, first, we need to find the source of the Galra signal and take care of that. We can’t proceed without neutralizing that threat first. We have someone who can help track that for us.” Keith nods at Pidge who nods back and then looks around hopefully, praying that is all they want right now.

Sepash nods.

Thankfully, that seems to please everyone, at least enough for them to let the Paladins set out. Allura stays behind with Sepash, hiding her nervousness as much as possible while the rest of them leave. The mission seems fairly low-key at the moment and normally Allura wouldn’t be like this. But, Keith also knows that she (and the rest of them) must be feeling anxious without Shiro’s strong, grounding presence.

Once away from the settlement, Keith feels a new determination. No more talking. No more diplomacy. His fingers itch near his bayard. Just a normal mission. Find a threat and neutralize it. Target the Galra. It feels more comfortable the further they get away from Sepash and the weird meeting room.  

“This way, guys,” Pidge says, bringing him out of his thoughts. She has a little handheld device that Keith imagines she may have built herself, or at least hacked to modify for her own purposes.

“So, let’s hope it is just like, one Galra who is a scientist or something and not a warrior,” Hunk says.

“Don’t you think Frozaki is cute for a water monster?” Lance says.

Keith nods only at Pidge, charging off in the direction of the Galra signal.

They can do this.

They have this.

They can complete this mission and get information about Shiro. Everything is fine. All Keith has to do is keep marching in the direction of Pidge’s beeping device, hand on his weapon. He tunes out Lance and Hunk’s banter.

They can do this.

I can do this.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: A Galra ship and Lance discovers the mystery of the planet
> 
> Also, a reference video for how I am imagining the aliens in here.
> 
> [Abyss Trailer with Water Alien lol](https://youtu.be/4zbpL3LeW7k?t=1m30s)


	4. Varadero of the Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance discovers an unimaginable horror that is even worse than Keith's fumbling attempts to lead Voltron.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LANCE'S BIRTHDAY IS COMING UP!!!!   
> It is sad how excited I am. I am already planning a one shot for it lol. I knew he would be a Summer baby. A lot of people seemed to think he would be Fall or Winter for astrology reasons and I will fully admit that I am just not an astrology person so I can't really speak to personality traits of the signs that match Lance. However, he seems so associated with warmth and fun and liveliness and the beach that it was hard for me to see him as anything but a Summer baby. 
> 
> I wonder if Jeremy Shada will be doing an interview for the occasion? :)

Lance will take the disappointment of the Galra ship just because of how funny it is to see Keith deflate like a balloon once they realize that no one is on board.

They had found the small ship easily, wrecked into a small patch of trees on the planet. Everyone had been on high alert despite the size of the ship, keyed up and ready to take down anything that moved. Keith had been on another level of intense, gripping his bayard so hard that his hand was shaking. Lance briefly considers hiding and jumping out at him at one point after it is obvious there are no Galra alive on the ship, but quickly changes his mind. He could do without Keith’s bayard in his chest today, thank you.  

“Pidge, you are sure this is the only Galra signature on the planet?” Keith asks when they meet back up outside. He looks disappointed which Lance both understands and wants to mock.

“Yes…well…you know, except for you,” she answers.

Lance snorts. “Our almighty leader led us on an attack against an empty plane.”

“Hey, it isn’t my fault they registered a signal from the Galra and then…”

“We did have to check it out,” Hunk says, cutting off their budding argument.

“We still need to figure out what is wrong with the river,” Pidge says.

“I want to go back to their processing center. I could look at the fish, maybe even test the water, see what they have. This could be a chemical or biological issue,” Hunk says.

Keith nods.

“I am going to stay here and see if I can salvage anything from the wreckage…if that is ok?” Pidge asks.

“Yeah, then Lance and I will go upriver a bit and see if we can see anything. Everyone be careful though even if everything seems fine. Let everyone know if there are any signs of trouble.”

Pidge returns to the ship while Hunk moves back toward the settlement. Keith walks off like he expects Lance to just follow him. So he does.  

And it shouldn’t irritate him, but it does.

Everyone seems to be trying really hard to fill the gaps left by the absence of their leader. Everyone is trying to step it up, act more like adults, prove that they are competent. Lance thinks it is part of the reason they were all ready to attack anything that moved near the clearly abandoned ship.

Lance gets it and he feels for his teammates.  

Keith is different though. He is half-annoyed, half-sympathetic for Keith. He knows that Keith has been pushed into a weird position and it helps that Keith himself doesn’t think he is qualified for it. But, seeing him fumbling around trying to be the leader irks Lance for some reason he cannot identify. There is a desperation to it that should make him sympathetic, but Lance doesn’t want to see Keith trying to be Shiro.

The fact that Pidge had asked Keith if she could stay at the wreckage makes him angry too. They shouldn’t need to ask Keith for permission to do anything. They had barely done that with Shiro.

Rational Lance tells himself that she only asked because her reasons for staying at the wreckage are not related to Shiro or the current mission. She is technically ducking out on the mission to look for her brother and just because the scan is coming up clean didn’t mean that there isn’t danger lurking or even Galra that had somehow slipped through the scan.

Irrational Lance lets himself direct all his current negative feelings toward Keith.

Everyone misses Shiro, but it seems to cut Keith deeper than just losing his leader and friend. He wonders what Keith’s reaction would be if one of the others had gone missing.  He had seemed fine with the possibility of Allura being gone. Hunk had even called him out for how cold he acted while suggesting they just leave Allura to the Galra. His anger at Pidge when she wanted to leave Voltron seemed to be more directed at not being able to form Voltron than actually missing Pidge.  If Lance himself were missing, how would Keith react?

He imagines Keith telling the rest of Voltron that they should start looking for a new blue Paladin and shudders.

Rational Lance knows he is being unfair to Keith. It isn’t a question that Keith cares for them, all of them. Just not as much as he cares about Shiro. Which makes sense. He knows Keith and Shiro have history that extends much longer than just Voltron.

A part of Lance wants to know exactly what that history is though.

He would like to talk to Keith about it, but can’t find the way to broach the subject without seeming aggressive or petty. Bringing up Shiro at all is a risky venture with Keith right now unless you have an idea for how to find him. Keith himself seems tense and angry, worse than Lance has seen him at any point since they entered the Castle. So Lance stays quiet, walking beside Keith along the stream that was once a river. He catches Keith glancing at him a few times and pretends like he is busy examining the landscape.  

It doesn’t sit right with him to walk a step behind Keith though so he picks up his pace to edge ever so slightly in front of Keith.

_He may be the new leader of Voltron, but that doesn’t mean he is my leader_ , Lance thinks.

Keith begins walking faster too, slipping just ahead of Lance.

_Oh hell no,_ Lance thinks, walking faster.

It isn’t long before they are power walking down the river, almost running directly into the problem without even seeing it.

Lance is about to break into an actual run when he sees it and stops. There is clearly some sort of obstruction across the river.

“Wait…look,” he says and points.  

Keith pauses, looking at the river, and then stomps forward, materializing his bayard. When they draw closer, they see that it is a huge wad of the cotton candy stuff, acting like a bizarre pastel dam and diverting much of the water.

Lance giggles, unable to stop himself.

“They brought us here to clear up a blockage for a river,” Keith says, in disbelief.  

“They called on Voltron, defender of the literal universe, to do yardwork,” Lance replies, noting Keith’s growing anger. “But, they may have information for how to find Shiro so…”

Keith glances at him and nods, anger dissipating in a second. “Yes, it is worth it.”

He takes an experimental swing at the dam.

“Lance? I think it will go faster if you go to the other side and work on it and I will work on this side.”

“Great, less time spent with you.”

“Whatever.”

Lance starts to walk to the other side of the dam, noting the trees that dot the area, heavy with the cotton candy substance that is ruining the river.   

Distracted by his thoughts, Lance reaches up and strokes some of the pale pink strands hanging from one of the trees. The silky looking strings lay over the branches like Spanish moss, flowing in the wind. He pulls back when a wad of it sticks to his hand. He looks at it more closely here and it looks even more like cotton candy up close. It even has something that looks like the little sugar crystals in cotton candy. Younger Lance would probably be thrilled to be on a beautiful dessert planet like this, looking like something straight out of his cartoons.

However, right now all he can feel is a stab of pain in his chest, remembering how if he were at home maybe he would be going to some of the summer fairs now with his younger brother and sister. He can’t help himself and puts some of the substance in his mouth, somehow hoping that it tastes like cotton candy too even though he understands on another level that he is being stupid.

His assumptions are correct. It is tasteless and stringy though it does mostly melt on his tongue. Lance huffs, wiping the rest off on his hip and continuing his walk toward the other side of the dam.

The other side of the massive structure of cotton candy blocking the river looks a lot like where he had just left Keith. It stretches over the river like a weird surrealistic dam, creating a small lake on the other side. It isn’t as big as Lance thinks a lake should be that is created by a dam, but it is there. He makes his way down the cotton candy structure base and prepares to shoot when he stops himself.

_What if I accidentally shoot Keith_? He thinks, the stupidity of them breaking up like this hitting him at once. His rifle is fairly powerful and shooting in Keith’s direction doesn’t seem like a great idea. He groans, and lowers his gun.

It is when he is considering walking back to the other side that something catches his eye. He sees four big rocks glittering brightly at the base of the structure, the sun’s light reflecting off of them. Or, suns rather, Lance reminds himself, quickly looking up at the sky.   

Lance moves closer and realizes that they do not look so much like rocks, but gems. They are stunningly beautiful. As he moves closer, the dark gems, like obsidian, have a prism of color, a spectrum of rainbow glinting across their glossy surface.

_Pretty,_ Lance thinks. There has always been a part of Lance that enjoys the finer things in life despite just being a boy from Cuba. He was happy to find the silky robes and facial masks in the castle. He likes soft things, pretty things. These gems stir more than just his love of pretty things though.

He thinks back to his mother, who had sparkling jewelry she wore to church and special occasions when Lance was a child. The jewelry had gotten sold when his dad was demoted from full-time to part-time at his job. It had been a hard couple of months that the family had never really recovered from due to two more children being born after Lance. Lance had just been a child when most of this happened and only truly understands how amazing his parents are later in life. They had supported a large family of five kids. None of them had ever gone hungry. They always had clothes that fit them even if they weren’t designer or trendy. They always had some sort of birthday and Christmas. Maybe not Iphones or other expensive gifts, but gifts that clearly came from the heart. Lance still owns a little space ship he got for Christmas one year. It is still sitting in his room at the Garrison, one of the few personal items he brought along with him. 

Lance dreams of becoming a fighter pilot not only because he can’t imagine loving anything as much as flying and space, but the wages are not a bad deal either. He often dreams of paying off his parents’ mortgage and buying his mom jewelry again. Of course, they would try to refuse his help, but he would do it anyway.

A lump forms in his throat as he thinks about his family, who he may never see again. He wonders how they are doing. His older sister would have had her baby by now. He is an uncle again and his new niece or nephew might never meet him. He had already put in for a short leave of absence from the Garrison to go visit them once the baby was born. Lance was looking forward to another baby in the family, a chubby little squirming new life that would grow up calling him Uncle Lance. He would babysit and feed the kid pizza and ice cream and they would watch cartoons all night long together.   

He wonders if his dad is taking care of his arthritis. Or if his mom’s diabetes had been acting up lately. He wonders if his older brother is going to graduate this spring or summer. He thought that it would have to be summer, but there was a chance otherwise. Lance would miss the graduation too.

He mutes his helmet com, afraid that some noise would give away the fact that he might actually start crying right now in the middle of a mission like a baby. Like a big 18-year-old baby. He shakes his head furiously, fighting back the urge. It isn’t like he is ashamed to miss his family. He just doesn’t get why he seems to be the one to miss his family the most, the one struggling the most with their current situation. He supposes it is different for the others given their situations. Pidge is focused on trying to find her family. Keith doesn’t have a family beyond Shiro apparently. He has no idea what Shiro’s family is like though.

He knows Hunk has to miss his parents though, but beyond sometimes being scared or missing food from home, even Hunk seems to be coping with being a Paladin far from home.  

He feels even lonelier because he is the only one in the castle struggling with this. Everyone else had seemed to adjust so quickly and seamlessly, easing into their new roles except for Pidge, but even she wasn’t crying when she almost left that one time. She had seemed determined, brave, and like she had her shit together. She wasn’t a shaking little baby about it by any means and she was only 16 years old.

The only ones who can truly commiserate with Lance are Allura and Coran, but he knows better than to lean on them too much. It would be an asshole move. Their entire civilization is dead and gone. Lance’s is fine-just currently separated from him with trillions of miles of cold, dead space between them.

He is lost in thoughts about his mom and dad when he reaches out for one of the gems just to stroke it. In unison, every gem…closes.

_Blinks_ , Lance corrects himself. _They blinked_.  

The gems open again and undeniably look at him. The cotton candy structure quivers. A small part of Lance’s brain remains in denial, trying to protect his sanity.

His mind doesn’t want to put everything together but it does. It does. He has seen this before, this formation, these…eyes. Because Lance has to admit that they are, indeed, eyes. And the cotton candy that looks like a web doesn’t just look like a web. It is a web.

In that moment, Lance feels fear like he never has before. Not when getting the intimidating amounts of vaccinations needed to enter the Garrison. Not when he is suddenly expected to save the universe when all he wants to do is fly. Not even really when facing the evil emperor Zarkon himself. Two long legs emerge from the cotton candy center as something big hauls itself up, two fangs taking up most of its face, if you can call it a face.

“Keith,” Lance gets on his com, so scared that he somehow sounds calm.

“Yeah,” he hears Keith answer.

“You need to get over here right now. Please.”

His voice cracks on the please and, any other time, he would have rather died than plead with Keith for help during a mission. But, two legs quickly become eight and Lance can’t bring himself to care as something impossibly huge looms over him. Lance quickly assesses his situation. He knows he needs distance to be an effective fighter, both because of his bayard and the fact that he likes creating a strategy after assessing the field, so to speak. He is too close right now, too close for his rifle to be effective, too close to think. He grabs at his bayard, manifesting it while trying to back up. He manages to get off two blasts before fangs sink into the soft flesh of his stomach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: Will Keith save Lance or be eaten by the spider? 
> 
> Someone theorized Lotor might be on this planet and sadly not-just a big ass spider lol. I have never seen a big ass spider used in Voltron fics and that seems weird to me. Like, every good franchise needs a big ass spider villain like Shelob and Aragog. 
> 
> Lotor is coming really soon though, promise.


	5. Eight Legged Freak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith tries to save Lance's life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible Trigger Warning-I am posting links to the exact spider I am talking about in the end notes. Do NOT click on any of those links if you don't want to see spider pictures. Just avoid the end notes. 
> 
> Also, I took a day or two off the internet and came back and the fandom was like, on fire. I'm not going to lie, a part of me is in pain at missing anything new about Lotor, but I can wait until September (or the first official trailer?).

Keith hears Lance’s voice and immediately knows something is very, very wrong. Lance saying please without calling him an asshole or being sarcastic scares him down to his core. He races to the other side of the dam so fast that he might as well have teleported. He is imagining Galra as he runs toward Lance. Somehow Pidge missed something. Somehow they were hiding and had ambushed Lance. He is ready to kill every purple body he sees especially if there is so much as a scratch on Lance’s body.

He freezes when he gets around the mass of cotton candy, giving him a direct line of sight into why Lance sounded so scared. What he sees in front of him is so horrific that, for a moment, he cannot even comprehend what it is. Some part of his brain carefully shields him from registering what lay before him.

Looming over Lance and guarding the damaged, crumpling dam is a monstrously huge spider. It had to be as big as a bus or bigger.  It’s golden-colored, long and thin body is complemented by segmented, black legs. The gold is actually kind of pretty, a shade Keith isn’t used to seeing on a spider. It would be beautiful if it were anywhere else but on a huge spider from hell.

Keith realizes with a start that the cotton candy must be a web. They were in its web.

He sees Lance at the bottom of the web-dam, partially cocooned in the cotton candy substance, moaning.

“It bit me Keith, it bit me, I’m going to die!”

Keith’s brain shuts off and he launches himself at the giant spider without a second thought. The spider starts vibrating, bouncing back and forth with enough power that the entire cotton candy structure quivers beneath it. Keith goes on the defensive, guarding himself from the vicious attack. He then swings his sword at the spider, but it bounces off roughly. His body shakes at the impact and he is thrown backward. He falls and is horrified when he slips down the cotton candy webbing, unable to stop himself immediately despite stabbing his sword into the webbing to try to stop his descent. Somehow, he turns during his fall and finds himself standing with his back turned to the spider. He reflexively spins, planting his back foot and ready for the attack he assumes is coming. However, the spider stays in its position, bouncing back and forth, but not coming toward him.   

Keith tries to approach again, but the erratic thrashing makes it more difficult to find an opening than one would think.

He wishes Hunk were here to blast the spider into outer space.

Or Pidge to tie the spider up.

Or that Lance was fine and able to shoot its legs off.

Or that Shiro would appear and somehow make everything ok again like he always does.

Whenever he tries to attack, the vibrations whirl so fast that he can barely sight an opening or place to stab. He grits his teeth and charges again, thrusting his sword inward and receiving the same powerful impact, throwing him backwards. 

He can’t quite seem to figure out the spider’s attack plan other than erratic bouncing. It never seems to take advantage of Keith’s weakness, not even when he fell down in front of it, sliding on the web, and standing up with his back turned. His method of throwing himself at the spider only seems to land him on his ass again every time.

As if cued, he hears Lance moaning behind him and jerks to attention.

“Stupid fucking spider,” Lance yells.

It is all Keith needs to realize that, yes, it is a stupid fucking spider and nothing else. He suddenly understands that, though huge, it is just a spider no different from a spider at home. It is like being in a battle with an animal and not even a particularly smart one. It isn’t like fighting with sentient creatures who can form battle strategies and think through actions, making them more dangerous.

It is just an animal. Or insect. Whatever, Keith thinks.

He eases backward, changing tactics. The spider continues bouncing aimlessly and perhaps a bit less violently now that Keith has given it some space.

He hears Lance moaning in the background again and gasps when he realizes he may have made a mistake. Lance is possibly gravely injured and he should have focused on getting help for Lance first. He realizes he needs to retreat.

He runs back toward Lance, his new priority, and changes his game plan from attacking to getting him to safety and returning with more fire power.   

“Lance,” he yells when he gets close to him. He brushes a little of the webbing off Lance’s face. 

“I’m dying. Spiders inject you with poison that melts your fucking innards Keith I am dying!!”

Keith panics, hoisting Lance up in his arms. He opens the comm on his helmet, frantically trying to get Allura. 

 

“Allura, Lance is injured, it’s bad. I am coming back now, get a doctor, or a pod or…”

““It hurts,” Lance wails in the background.

“What??” Allura responds.

“There is a big ass fucking spider…” Keith spits out.

“Oh god, why…” 

“Is that Lance in the background? A spider? I am not sure what that is…” Allura replies. 

“My innards!”

“A big gold fucking spider that I am going to kill so hard,” Keith attempts to yell over Lance.

Keith can hear Allura talking to someone beside her. 

“Princess, Lance is dying!”

“Just…just get him here. We have medics waiting.”

 

He picks Lance up bridal style and starts running. Panic invades every cell of his body and he ignores the burn in his legs and lungs as he runs. Lance weighs more than he thought he would. He is thin, but tall. Keith vaguely remembers some lecture in what feels like a different life now where he learned about how a thin, tall person would actually still weigh a lot because blood and organs and bones weigh quite a bit. Keith thinks that Lance’s organs and bones and blood weigh a lot as he clutches him tighter and runs faster. It is the organs that scare him though. The other boy had fallen silent when Keith picked him up and cradled him to his chest.

He can’t tell if Lance is still breathing, if his heart is still beating. The jerking motion of his running makes it impossible.

He wishes he could remember more about spiders and what they do when they bite someone. He thought they paralyzed prey and then the organ dissolution took longer to happen. But, maybe big space spiders are different. He wonders which organs could be damaged without killing Lance. Is it going for his heart, the worst case scenario in Keith’s mind? How much damage could a liver or a kidney or a gallbladder take before killing a person? Couldn’t humans live without some of their organs? Did spider poison attack innards all together or did it target anything in particular? Keith wishes he had paid more attention in biology though it wouldn’t make a difference now.  

Keith latches onto these thoughts to keep him calm though. 

He suddenly feels a swelling of anger for this disgusting monster. They had fought the dictator of the entire universe and survived, but a spider might take Lance down? _Fuck that_ , Keith thinks, pushing himself to run faster.

He fantasizes about killing the spider. He would get Pidge to tie the spider up somehow so it couldn’t move. Maybe wrap branches around its body. Then, Hunk could blast off each of its legs, one by one. Then he himself could shove his blade right through its heart.

_Do spiders have hearts?_

It doesn’t matter to him if they do or not. Keith would stab whatever would make the spider stop living. Then, he would take the rotting corpse and leave it either outside Lance’s hospital room or on his grave. Right now, he wanted to kill that spider more than he wanted to kill any Galra.

He hits one of the paths created by the Zerfian people that remind him so much of water slides and promptly slips, taking a knee in an attempt to control his body’s trajectory. He almost drops Lance, but prides himself when he manages to hold on. He sits there for a moment, looking down at the other boy, surprised to see Lance looking back up at him.

“You are stronger than you look,” Lance says.

“What? Shut up,” Keith responds without thinking, only realizing a second later that Lance hadn’t actually insulted him. “Wait, sorry, I mean…Thanks?”

Keith pushes himself back to a standing position, ignoring the screaming of his joints and muscles.

“I hope I make a beautiful corpse,” Lance murmurs as Keith starts running again.

“Shut up you aren’t dying,” Keith responds.  

As he finally sees the settlement of the Zerfians looming in the distance, he fights back an urge to laugh at the fact that he may have gotten Lance killed in his very first mission as the leader of Voltron.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: Keith tries to control his temper 
> 
> SKIP THESE END NOTES IF YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE SPIDERS!!!!! 
> 
> The spider I am referring to is a Golden Orb Weaver. It is actually kind of a cool looking, pretty spider? I hate spiders, but it is. The first two are just pictures of Orb Weavers, the third link is a size reference because they do get quite big (not bus-sized, but like, way too damn big). Then, the last link is a video of when spiders do that weird thing where they bounce and thrash mindlessly to try to get you away from their web, which is basically what the spider in here is doing lol.
> 
>  
> 
> [Orb Weaver Pic #1](https://haydensanimalfacts.files.wordpress.com/2016/06/golden-orb-weaver.jpg)
> 
>  
> 
> [Orb Weaver Pic #2](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/7RXyYzjzZvs/maxresdefault.jpg)
> 
>  
> 
> [Orb Weaver Size Ref](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/73/87/18/738718bd9722a7bb935d50fe2a4110ce.jpg)
> 
>  
> 
> Video of Spider Bouncing


	6. Uhm, Actually, Spiders are Arachnids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith discovers the truth behind the spider

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like everyone was really OOC in this chapter, but my own fear of spiders kind of took over.

  

Keith is sitting on a small chair that isn’t quite the right shape for a human, but he makes it work, jaw clenched and arms crossed.

Allura is eyeballing him, smiling but her eyes are stern. Lance, alive and without melted insides, is blushing beside Keith on a weird platform that he assumes is a Zerfian version of a hospital bed. He is also staring at Keith, trying to make eye contact, smiling stiffly.

“So,” Keith begins, trying to calm himself down, understanding the silent message being sent by Lance and Allura.  He grits his teeth into a smile at Sepash, the Zierfian doctor and nurse, and Allura.

“So,” the doctor says, smiling genuinely, not picking up on Keith’s anger, Allura’s tenseness, or Lance’s amused demeanor.

An hour earlier had been more hectic. Keith had finally gotten Lance to the settlement and basically thrown him at the doctors that were, to the credit of the Zerfians, already waiting.  He had been very close to having words with Sepash and his adviser who were also waiting, pulled between wanting to yell at them for not informing them of the giant vicious spiders on the planet and gathering Hunk and Pidge to go kill the monster. He is so angry that he doesn’t immediately register that Pidge and Hunk seem remarkably calm about their friend possibly dying. Pidge even looks like she is smiling. Allura had grabbed his arm, yanking him to the side with her surprising strength and hissed at him to go with Hunk and Pidge and calm down.

They had taken him to a side room and explained that the spiders were actually harmless and that Lance was likely not dying. Also, that Keith should calm down and not attack the leaders of the planet. Keith barely registers their words, ready to end anyone who would keep him from killing that spider with or without Pidge and Hunk’s help.

“So you are telling me that this disgusting insect…”

“Arachnid,” Pidge corrects.

“What?”

“Spiders are technically arachnids, not insects,” Hunk chimes in.

“Yeah, they are two different species and you can tell the difference…”

“I don’t care!” Keith interrupts.

Pidge smacks him on the arm with her bayard and tells him to chill. The only thing that seems to calm him down though is a nurse (or what Keith assumes is a nurse) coming in and telling them that they can see Lance now. Keith does a double take due to the fact that barely 10 minutes have passed. He is imagining extensive damage and at least some time in a pod if nothing else.  

Keith checks on Lance immediately, needing to see it with his own eyes. Lance already looks sheepish, showing him on his abdomen where the spider had basically head-butted him, but not bit him or poisoned him. There would probably be a bruise, but beyond that, he is fine.  

Keith stands before Lance at this moment, trying to find some sort of equilibrium after going through a dramatic range of emotions in the last hour. His adrenaline still pumps even though there is no enemy. He is struggling to control his hands, his heart. He isn’t sure whether he wants to punch Lance or kiss him.

“Can I have a moment alone with him?” Keith asks.

The nurse nods and Keith pointedly ignores whatever facial expressions Pidge and Hunk are making as they move outside.

There is a moment of silence.

“I’m dying. Save me Keith. My innards are dissolving!” he says, mimicking Lance’s voice.

“Oh fuck right off. You have a giant monstrous spider pounce on you and stick her fangs into your body and not panic.”

“You don’t have puncture wounds. She didn’t stick her fangs into your body.”

“Whatever. I guess I was just scared because, you know, big fucking spider…” Lance explains himself, looking embarrassed.

 “I’m done” Keith says.

“What?”   
“I’m done, I’m going back”

“To the castle?”

“To Earth.”

“Keith.”

“I am done. Galra sure. Weblums, why not. I draw the line at big spiders.”

“You…”

“I am done, I am going back to my shack and the universe can kiss my ass.”

“You are scared of spiders aren’t you? You big coward.”

“I am not scared of spiders Mr. my innards are melting”

“Ok, ok, it’s kind of funny, no?”

“No, absolutely nothing about this is funny. Why aren’t you more upset?” Keith would have imagined Lance being more keyed up. “Why do you seem so calm right now?”

“Crushing embarrassment? The nurse even kissed me on the forehead and gave me a lollipop.” Lance holds up what appears to be a clear, fish shaped blob on a stick. Keith stares at it silently for a moment.

“I am just saying that if you have something like that on your planet you need to warn people…”

“Just relax. I don’t think they see them as horrific. These people may have information about Shiro. Ok? So, smile and play nice.”

“Shiro…” Keith mutters to himself. Right. They have a goal here.  

So, an hour later, Keith finds himself smiling politely and pretending like he isn’t dreaming of killing every spider in existence.  

“So, your planet has huge scary spiders…”

“Zimekis.”

“Zimekis…and no one bothered to tell us…”

“Who is afraid of a Zimeki??”

“Or tell us that this terrifying monster…”

“Sweet, gentle species.”

“Is completely harmless and even beneficial to the planet…”

“Yes. The Zimekis and Zierfians have a symbiotic relationship. They eat bugs that eat our fish.”

“Bugs big enough to eat fish…”

“Yes, of course. They eat the bugs that eat our fish. We keep the fish population down which keeps the waters healthy for them and the bugs which act as their food source.”

Keith takes a deep breath. Old Keith would have snapped at these people. He isn’t trying to be Keith anymore though. He needs to be thinking What Would Shiro Do.

“They are noble creatures. Very gentle, very wise. Sometimes our kids ride them. The royal family even has a few as pets. The youngest likes to sleep with her Zimeki in the same bed.”

Keith tries not to shudder openly at the thought of a child laying in bed with a big spider wrapped around them.  

“So why did it attack Lance?”

“Your Lance probably scared her. They do have venom, but it is only harmful to the bugs on this planet. She probably struck out in fear, tried to hide again, and then you came swinging a sword at her like a brute.”

Keith takes another breath. Shiro. Shiro. Not Keith. Shiro.

He smiles and, honestly, he is no longer angry at them. It isn’t the first or last misunderstanding that they would have with aliens. He understands he is being a bit “cranky,” as Hunk once called him, even for himself.

“A misunderstanding then. I am glad that we did not harm your…Zimeki. We did, however, destroy her web though…”

“Oh that is actually good news! See, every once in a while the Zimeki make an inconvenient web and this one seems to have accidentally stopped up the river. It will move on and build somewhere else now and we already see more fish in our pens! Plus, it is a relief to know that no Galra reside on this planet as we suspected.”

“Then I am happy we could help the Zerfian people even with this misunderstanding. Voltron is dedicated to helping those in need,” Allura steps forward, taking over for Keith. Keith throws her a relieved look.  

“We are happy too and, of course, we will uphold our part of the deal. We can tell you what we know about the astral plane and even project there if possible. We will help in any way we can.”

Allura insists that Lance and Keith take the afternoon off while her, Hunk, and Pidge look into the astral planes. It makes sense: Allura is already the most connected to that realm while Hunk and Pidge can probably analyze it better than him or the “recovering” Lance. As he walks away with Lance, Keith wonders if Allura wants Keith out of the way, noting his still tense shoulders.

They walk down a soft hallway until they reach doors. Keith pauses for a moment. He wants to tell Lance what he is feeling right now, that he was so scared when he thought Lance was dying, that he feels more responsible now for their wellbeing now that Shiro left them and dumped Voltron on his shoulders. But, he remains quiet.  

There are words unsaid on Lance’s part as well as he fiddles with his sleeve and avoids eye contact.

“Well…” Lance starts.

“I guess I want to go lay down.”

“Yeah, same here.”

Keith turns to walk into the room.

“Hey Keith?”

He turns around.

“Thanks for attacking a huge spider for me.”

“No problem. And don’t you mean the sweet gentle Zimeki?” He rolls his eyes. “Thanks for…not dying.”

“Right…I do what I can.”

Keith turns and enters his room.  

The room is strange to say the least. Instead of chairs, it has what looks like to Keith to be open containers that are quite large, but unusable for human beings. Keith assumed that the gelatinous creatures of this planet could probably insert themselves into the containers.

In the corner, there is an actual bed though and Keith assumes this is for diplomatic reasons. Surely, they had other creatures who visited that preferred something other than a large vase to sleep in. Maybe not humans, but most species seem to have a physical form of some sort.  

Keith sits on the bed and thinks about the day. Being alone and finally resting allows his thoughts to catch up with him. He isn’t really angry at the Zerfians or the spider. He is angry at himself.

He knows they succeeded, but he feels like a failure anyway. Sure, this Zimeki (huge spider, Keith doesn’t care what they want to call it) turned out to be nice and harmless, but what if it hadn’t been? He rethinks every mistake he made. Splitting up with Lance. Attacking the Zimeki without a strategy. Not being able to defeat a big, dumb, apparently peaceful creature. Not even checking on Lance before attacking the Zimeki. Not calling Allura and the Zerfians for more information.

He wonders why he didn’t call for Pidge and Hunk even after just telling everyone to keep in contact if there was any sign of trouble.

Or, maybe there were questions he should have asked during their initial meeting with the Zerfians that would have revealed the existence of the big spiders.

Shiro wouldn’t have made these mistakes. Shiro would have protected Lance and made better decisions and communicated better and made up a strategy that would have worked. Keith just got lucky that Zimekis are big cuddly teddy bears here. A deadlier foe would have killed Lance. Probably Keith too.

Keith feels wound up like a top, unable to loosen the knot in his stomach.

He had done everything wrong.

He had failed as a leader.

A weird sloshing noise breaks him from his thoughts. He stares at the door before realizing that this might be what knocking sounds like to a Zerfian.

He opens the door to see Frozaki standing there. The alien is still vaguely human shaped, but perhaps more bubbly than Keith had seen the others. It reminds him just a bit of the bubbles in a fish tank flowing through the alien.  

“Ah, black paladin, leader of Voltron.”

Keith tries to hide his wince at that moniker, currently feeling undeserving of the title.   

“May I come in and have a word with you?”

Something like a smile crosses Frozaki’s face.

“Sure,” Keith says, opening the door and letting Frozaki shut it behind him after he enters.

The jello-like being turns toward him again after shutting the door.

“You are angry right now.”

Keith starts. He really is trying not to show it.

“No, no I’m not…”

“We are fluid beings, Black Paladin…Keith? Can I call you that?”

Keith nods.

“I know your species is different, but I can still tell that you are strained right now…clogged up.”

“I was just worried about my friend.”

“He is fine, no?”

“Yes, he is. I just need to unwind a bit.”

“Why aren’t you guys staying in the same room?”

“Why would we be?”

“Oh, I don’t know.”

Fro glides into the room, eventually sitting on the bed.  

“Do you know what Zerfians excel at in addition to fish and the astral plane?”

“What?” Keith is tired and he doesn’t really care, but he understands that this is the child of Sepash, leader of all Zerfians, so he should play nice.

“Massages.”

“Massages?”

“Yes. You seem tense. Why don’t you lay down and let me help?”

Shiro would say no. Keith would almost always say no too. He barely likes being touched by people he knows and likes. But, he has to admit he is curious what a liquid alien could do in a massage.

“Come on, nothing to be afraid of.” Fro’s face splits in what he assumes to be a smile again and pats the bed beside them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: You know what happens next time and also some Shiro development


	7. Pour Some Water On Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith gets a happy ending and a way to find Shiro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is alien sex in this chapter. 
> 
> Ok, so the new trailer came out when I was out with friends and my phone starting blowing up and they were like oh my god what is going on and I was like uh, nothing! Nothing at all!! **goes to the bathroom and looks at Lotor** And gawd, Lotor's voice does things for me. I wonder who the voice actor is?

Keith doesn’t really know what he is doing as he takes off part of his armor and rolls his suit down. He lets it hang around his waist and questions his life choices.

“It is fine to take off more,” Fro says.  

“Uh, no…no thanks.”

“Are the humans weird about nudity?” Fro asks before guiding him so that he is laying on his stomach on the bed. 

“We usually don’t get naked in front of strangers.”

“Am I a stranger?”

“Yes, right now you are.”

“Could we change that?” Fro begins sliding up his back. Keith shivers under the touch.  

It is definitely a stranger experience than the one time he had gotten a massage back at home. Shiro had recommended it for a shoulder injury he had after an accident with his hover bike. That massage had been good, but felt clinical as opposed to whatever Fro is currently doing as they glide up and down his skin.

“Yes, we can change that if you want.”

“Good. Just relax. You are so tense. I can feel it. Just let me help you.”

Keith tries, breathing deeply and closing his eyes.

The feeling of Fro on his back intensifies and becomes something akin to hot tub jets. Somehow though, it isn’t wet like Keith expects. It is the pressure working its way over his body without the drippy side effect.  

“Human skin is so weird.”

 _Says the jello alien_ , Keith thinks in his head.

“Do you get cold easily? I read somewhere that humans aren’t good at extreme temperatures.”

“Uh…yeah I guess that is true. I mean, we get around it by wearing clothes or adapting in other ways.”

There is a strange sensation as Fro leans over him, covering more of his body and rippling rather than using the jet-like sensation. It feels good though and Keith finds himself almost nodding off, relaxing under Fro’s touch. At one point, the alien eases even further over him, and it begins to feel like he is in a bath tub, completely surrounded by warm liquid. Only his head is free from Fro’s body.

A horrifying tingle begins to build in his stomach as Fro glides over his body again and again and Keith groans. During the massage he received on Earth, it was even in the introductory materials that this is a normal reaction and nothing to be ashamed about, but he isn’t so sure an alien like Fro would understand or not be offended.

He digs his hips down, hoping Fro doesn’t notice. However, they seem to focus on his mid-section more and more the harder he becomes and a small problem quickly turns into an uncomfortable one.  

“We better stop,” he finally blurts out, trying to sit up.

“Didn’t I tell you to relax?” Fro responds, pushing him back down.

“I’m…”

“Just as sexually aroused as I am?”

Keith pauses. “Oh.”

“Come on, no one would have to know.”

“That isn’t the point, I am working right now…”

“By laying in a bed by yourself stressing out?”

Keith manages to turn himself over and sits up. He doesn’t attempt to hide his erection, figuring Fro already knows and probably read some weird book about it one time.  

Fro then turns into a vague approximation of Allura. Keith cringes.  

“Is this better?”

“No, that is weird…”

Fro then forms into Lance.

“Fro, no, just…”

Then they morph into Hunk.

“Just be yourself. You turned me on just now, not them. You are making it weirder.”

Fro laughs, a weird bubbly laugh that Keith likes. He smiles.

“So I turned you on?” They sound excited and Fro leans forward, brushing against Keith’s boner.

Keith moves away from the alien. “Fro? I am not sure this is ok.”  

“It is though. A documentary I watched told me about this.”

“Yeah, but…”

“The documentary I watched said that humans have sex for pleasure.”

“Do…do Zerfians? Like, what would I need to do…”

Even if Keith wanted to go there with Fro, he isn’t sure where to touch or what to do. And Keith is no selfish lover. He makes sure his partners are taken care of.  

Fro laughs the same bubbly, vibrating laugh that makes Keith’s stomach tingle.  

“Yes, of course we do it for pleasure. We basically become one. I mean that literally. Like, we mix together. It is very pleasurable to mix yourself with someone else.”  

Keith imagines two of the aliens rolling around in a bowl together and stifles a laugh.

“Do you get pregnant?”

“I am assuming you mean reproduction? Not really. Or sort of? We reproduce by splitting in two, essentially. Any of us can do that after mixing with someone else because a small part of the other Zerfian will remain inside of you for a short time. You can split in two by yourself without mixing too, but the result will be barren and weak.”

“Do you have children?”

“No, I don’t want that yet. I could have, but I chose not to split after my partners. Can you get pregnant?”

Keith chokes. “No, no I can’t.”

 “Then there is no problem is there? Come on, _Keith,_ enjoy yourself.” Bubbles ripple up Fro’s body when they say his name.

Fro begins to spread over him again. He allows himself to be guided onto his back, accepting Fro’s body over his. Keith’s entire body starts to feel warm. He feels like he is laying in a bath tub, warm and soothing. He briefly wonders what he is doing and why it seemed like a good idea to even let Fro give him a massage when suddenly Fro begins to cover his head and face.

There is a short moment of panic which Fro senses.

“Trust me,” they say.

Keith then realizes that he can still breathe for some reason even with being fully submerged. And he has to admit it feels amazing. He feels warm and safe and soothed by the feeling of being completely surrounded by Fro’s warm, liquid body. He feels Fro seeping into him, into his pores, gently churning and bubbling. Fro swirls around his erection, gently, experimenting, concentrating on the movements that pull gasps from Keith’s mouth.

He feels Fro begin to poke around his ass too and shrugs. _When in Rome_ , he thinks before thrusting down into the alien’s movements. Fro takes this as the go-ahead and begins swirling inside him too.

The feeling is like nothing Keith has ever felt before and he loves it. The gentle bubbles and pressure without pain easily stretch him out and reach his deepest parts. He feels like there is not a single part of him, inside and out, that isn’t being rubbed by Fro. It isn’t long before he can’t stop his hips from thrusting upward, moaning and writhing while being completely submerged in Fro’s body.

Suddenly, he feels something squirt into his mouth. He swallows without thinking, a reflex.

“Oh my, you are so kinky,” Fro says.

Keith opens his mouth to ask what just happened before Fro increases the intensity of the pressure inside him, whirling particularly around that one spot that Keith thanks God for equipping him with.

He comes almost instantly, arching into the air before settling back into the bed. 

Neither of them speak or move for quite some time. And it’s nice. Keith closes his eyes and allows himself to relax more than he has in weeks. Every worry that he has is temporarily suspended. Fro is still wrapped around him and it is like being in a warm, soothing, and peaceful blanket. His senses are even dulled because his head is still covered. He takes a few deep breaths before he considers actually falling asleep like this with Fro curled around him.

Then, he hears a knock on the door. He can barely sit up before Hunk bursts into the room.

“Keith, we have some news…” Hunk’s voice stops abruptly.

Somehow, Fro is gone. Keith can only briefly wonder where they went before Hunk narrows his eyes at him.

It is then that Keith realizes that Fro is beside the bed, hiding behind it. He knows that Zerfians can basically melt into puddles, but it isn’t the right flooring apparently. Though Fro made themself small and flat, you can definitely still see them.

“News?” Keith squeaks out, cursing his voice.

“Is everything ok?” Hunk asks.

“Yeah I’m just…tired.” Keith tries to still his breath, knowing he probably looks flushed and sweaty.

Hunk takes a step or two forward. Keith panics, trying to think of a way to get Hunk to stop before he gets too close and sees Fro. He starts to get off the bed, thinking he can just charge outside and take Hunk with him when Hunk freezes and his eyes widen with understanding.

“Oh. Ooooooooh. Ok. It’s fine, man. Weird timing, but it’s fine,” Hunk says, backing up again.

Keith sighs with relief. “Ok…I’ll be ready in a…wait, what?”

Hunk inexplicably winks at him, smirking. “It’s fine. I get it, you get a bit stressed out, need to take care of yourself, right?”

Keith blushes when he realizes what Hunk thinks happened. He cringes, but then realizes this is better than Hunk walking closer and seeing that Keith just had some sort of weird alien sex with Frozaki, the equivalent of the heir of the land.

“Uh, yeah,” Keith laughs nervously. “I’ll be there in a minute?”

“Sure, I’ll wait outside.”

Hunk thankfully leaves. Fro swirls up beside the bed, choosing a non-descript form that is closer to Zerfian than human, Keith assumes.

They laugh. “You should have seen the look on your face! So funny!”

“I’ll leave first. You leave a few minutes later,” Keith says, standing up and pulling his suit back on.

“Treu is going to die!”

“What?”

“I’m the first of my friends to do someone from a different species. Oh my god, and an important one. Everyone knows Voltron! They are going to be SO jealous.”

“Wait, Fro, no, you can’t tell anyone. It’s…a private thing. For humans.”

There is a moment of awkward silence.

“Oh…sure. Yeah, I won’t tell anyone.”  

Keith finally gets his suit pulled on correctly. Fro squirms behind him, partially covering his body again. It feels something like a hug. He awkwardly pats their side.

“You are probably leaving to find your friend, right? But maybe we will see each other again, Keith?”

“Maybe,” Keith responds.

“And we aren’t strangers anymore, right?”

“No, no we aren’t.”

He leaves Frozaki sitting on the bed, quickly joining Hunk and Lance now as well in the hallway.

Fro watches him leave, smirking, and then squirms out the side of the room in the opposite direction.

Keith awkwardly makes his way with Hunk and Lance, walking a step behind them and hoping that Hunk would keep what he thinks he knows quiet from Lance. He didn’t need Lance to have that in his bag of reasons to tease him.

He quickly shifts focus to the lions though and the astral world.  This is why they are here on the planet in the first place.  

The thought that Shiro may have been transported into some other dimension seems like a joke to him. It isn’t that he doesn’t believe in astral planes and other dimensions. Even pre-Voltron, Keith always suspected there to be much outside of the realm of what he experienced on Earth. But, it seems like such a nebulous foe to Keith. He wishes Shiro were just lost or maybe even a prisoner, though the implications of that are terrible as well. Keith had seen how Shiro changed since his time with the Galra, the sometimes faraway look in his eyes and how his hands shook.  

They finally arrive at an open space where Allura and Pidge are talking with Stokes, who Keith recognizes as the adviser that greeted them with Sepash and Fro. All of their faces look guardedly optimistic and Keith allows just a smidge of hope to grow.

Stokes is currently in a formless shape, not bothering to mimic their form at all. He also seems excited, little bubbles floating in his body that Keith now recognizes to be a way that Zerfians show emotions.

“I have been told to simplify things for your sake, Black Paladin,” Stokes begins.  

“You can call me Keith and it’s only temporary,” Keith answers abruptly, ignoring, or rather not entirely being offended by the possible subtle insult.  

“Right. Anyway, we have been discussing the basics of projection and particularly how to find someone who is in or traveled through that realm.”

Keith perks up.

“At the heart of the matter is honing in on someone’s essence. You need to be able to feel their essence and recognize it and then follow it. Us Zerfians are taught from a very young age to read each other, to feel what is beneath the surface. It is intimate and speaks to the bond and understanding between individuals.”

Keith glances at Allura and grimaces. Stokes sounds like someone at a fair pretending to be able to read palms and that isn’t what Keith is looking for.

“Uh, and if none of us can track what is beneath Shiro’s surface?” Lance asks, voice conveying what Keith feels right now.

“There are two possibilities to solve that issue. Allura?” Stokes answers.  

“One of them is me. My essence is already tied to the plane that Shiro likely entered. It is how I am tied to the ship and lions. But, we would need a….what did you call it, Pidge?”

“A conductor. We would need a machine, essentially, that would allow Allura to focus her energy in this manner.”

“A machine that we would have to build out of items that we don’t currently have, but could find, according to Allura. It might just take some time,” Hunk adds.

Keith sighs. “What is the second possibility?”

“Well, there is one of you who can read Shiro’s essence, of that I am quite certain. We tried to track Shiro here and that included being in tune with all the essences currently on this planet and outside of it. There is one of you who is already connected to this Shiro.” Stokes responds before pointing a tendril of water at Keith.

“Me?”

“Yes, without a doubt.”

“I am close to Shiro, but I can’t…just…humans don’t track souls like that!”

“But you can. The potential is there. Especially since the black lion has accepted you.”

“But it hasn’t…”

“But Keith hasn’t thought of it that way!” Allura interrupts him. “Think of the black lion as a ready-made conductor. You just need to get in touch with the lion’s essence and then try to follow Shiro’s soul.”

Suddenly, finding parts to build the machine becomes more attractive to Keith.

Allura waits until after they have said their goodbyes to the planet, after Keith shares another handshake with Sepash and a smug looking Fro, and after Keith has accepted some sort of recording that is supposed to help him get in touch with his spiritual side to begin the conversation again.

“Keith, I am sorry for interrupting you earlier with Sepash’s adviser, but I did not want to chance anyone knowing that we cannot form Voltron right now. We are vulnerable. I had told them that the black lion already accepted you and that I am manning the last lion.”

“It’s fine. But, the black lion might want you instead of me.”

“Or it might not let any of us in,” Hunk offers.

There is a heavy silence.

“Ok, fine. The first step is seeing if anyone can get into the black lion. Then, that person will need to bond with it and try to find Shiro’s….soul. At the same time, we should be looking for that machine,” Keith says wearily.  

“Right,” Pidge says.  

“Sounds good,” Hunk responds.  

“So Keith, you know how to see beneath Shiro’s surface, huh?” Lance asks.  

Keith ignores Lance, instead focusing on Allura’s determined nod in his direction. He knows she needs Shiro back as much as he does and Keith is willing to do anything to make it happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: The Lion Chapter that I hope people won't be angry at me for since everyone seems super sensitive about the lions and which paladins are in them. 
> 
>  
> 
> (And yes, the chapter title is a Def Leppard Reference lol)


	8. I Got Soul but I'm Not a Soldier

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The paladins do the lion shuffle, Lance tries to bond with Red, and a gift arrives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the lion chapter. Sorry if you hate Black Paladin Keith.   
> Also, yes, I am shipper trash.

Lance quietly pads out of his room, glancing back and forth down the silent hallway. He is an adult, or at least sort of one. Lance supposes he can be considered an adult since he is risking his life to save the literal entire universe. So, there is no reason that he should be sneaking around. He can do what he wants.

Nevertheless, he crouches a bit, making sure to stay silent, ducking down just in case Keith is in the training deck or Hunk in the kitchen. He makes his way to the hangar where the lions sit. He feels Blue push against him as he enters the room. It is a friendly feeling though one that is hard to describe. Lance has never really felt anything like what he has with Blue. It isn’t like a voice in his head exactly, but sometimes he can tell what she is saying. It is more like an impression, or somehow having someone else in his head thinking with or for him.

Lance isn’t entirely sure how he feels about souls and religion and all of that stuff, but it feels like Blue is connected to him in a way that is more intimate than just being a ship or even a sentient ship. She feels intertwined with his very essence at times, like their souls are connected. He isn’t entirely sure how it works. He knows they are connected in a way that he would almost describe in terms of being soulmates though. He also knows that the essence, or whatever, of previous Paladins is supposed to be in the lions somehow. Trying to put it into words doesn’t quite work though. He can feel it though. He can sense the souls that influence Blue. He can sense them ebbing and flowing in his own veins sometimes when he is inside Blue.  

He hopes that one day, when he dies, that a part of him will remain with her as well. He wants his soul to stay with her, to become one with her.

Though, he cannot imagine what he can possibly give to Blue to add to her history.

He wonders if sometimes having a Paladin like him annoyed her. He is a good pilot, but not great. He is insecure and annoying at times. He knows this. It is difficult for him to put into words what exactly he brings that is special, that is worthy of a Voltron lion, that deserves to be left behind after his physical body dies.

He hopes that he will find whatever that is eventually. He hopes that she sees something in him that he doesn’t quite see in himself yet, but will eventually. That eventually he will discover whatever made Blue open her arms so willingly to him. And, she did. Her feelings about him are always clear and had been from day one. She has always been warm and inviting to Lance. She had purred the moment he sat in the pilot’s chair.

_My Paladin. My Warrior. My Kin._

He can feel these words when he is inside her sometimes. He isn’t sure if he is interpreting the last one correctly, but there is a feeling like he is part of the pack, part of her pack. And not just a part of it, but an _important_ part of the pack.  That he is necessary.

Sometimes he can feel fainter versions of the connection he has to Blue with the other Paladins, or maybe their lions. It is confusing sometimes which is which or where one begins and the other ends, but when he feels those other connections, it makes Lance feel secure and happy.

_His pack. His kin. The place where he belongs._

He feels that they are all a part of a family that is tied together by fate and the cosmos and the very fabrics of their souls.

Or, at least, he hopes so. But, as he stands before Blue now, he can’t stop the hurt and insecurity from seeping in. Being asked to give up Blue, even potentially, feels like admitting that their connection doesn’t really exist. Or at least that it isn’t that special.

What if Allura hits it off with Blue? And then Shiro comes back? Where would Lance go?

He enters Blue and crawls into the chair.

There are no words coming through their connection right now. It is only affection and acceptance that feel like a warm blanket to Lance. A tinge of sympathy.

When he finally hears the others enter the hangar, he pulls himself up, taking one last moment to adjust his face into the carefree one he knows they expect. The last strong impression he gets from Blue is the distinct impression that she is telling him that everything will be fine.

He greets the others and watches as Keith approaches the black lion. They have two main issues they are trying to resolve. Finding Shiro is one. Being able to form Voltron again is another.

They had decided that seeing if Keith would even be able to get in the black lion is the first step. If he can’t, then there would be no reason for Allura to try to pilot Red or Blue.

As Keith walks up to the black lion, he looks much better than he has in weeks, Lance notes. He looks calm and well-rested and determined.

_He looks like a leader,_ Lance thinks with a jolt.  

He approaches the black lion with all the intensity that Lance has come to know in Keith. His face is set. Others would interpret it as an angry face, even Lance at one point, but it isn’t, not really. It is just Keith’s energy.

The force field around the lion disappears almost instantly. Lance’s heart drops.

Keith enters the lion and a minute or two comes back out.

“I will pilot her,” he says.

Allura nods, trying, but mostly failing at hiding sadness. “Well, that is that,” she says.  

Lance leans against Hunk.

“That’s cool, man,” Hunk says.

Lance remains silent. There is no celebration on anyone’s part to see Black accepting a new pilot. It is like admitting that her pilot will not be coming back. He tries to focus on the fact that the black lion might be the key to finding Shiro though. Maybe even she understands that and is accepting Keith to try to get her paladin back.  

“I think you should try Black too just to be sure though, Allura, and then Red,” Pidge says.  

Lance notes that she leaves off trying Blue until the end even though that is part of the purpose of the day. He wonders if his feelings on the matter had been more transparent then he thought. A part of Lance prays that Black or Red will accept Allura. If Black likes Allura, then they have Voltron formed and no one moves lions. If Red likes Allura, then Lance could still stay with Blue and just accept Keith as the new head of Voltron.

Lance just really wants to stay with Blue.

Allura approaches Black. She stops short of trying to enter the lion though, closing her eyes for a few moments.

“It is a polite no,” she says finally. Keith lets out a breath of air that has Lance thinking he would have preferred Allura in Black as well.

She then approaches Red. Lance holds his breath.

As soon as Allura gets close however, Red turns on her force field. Allura stops momentarily, startled. Then, she places her hand up to the forcefield, closing her eyes.

She finally turns around again.

“It is a less polite no,” she says, looking at Lance carefully. He sighs, knowing that this would happen somewhere deep in his bones. Hunk elbows him gently, smiling at him. Hunk gets it.

“Red is crazy not to want such a beautiful pilot! I mean, who would want stinky Keith instead of a Princess?” Lance says.

“I don’t smell bad.”

“Dude, have you ever smelled yourself after…”

“Lance, Keith. We have more important things to worry about right now,” Allura interrupts.  

Allura approaches Blue next. If Blue won’t accept Allura, then there is no reason for Lance to try Red. The force field doesn’t go up, but she also doesn’t let Allura in, not right away. Allura closes her eyes again, placing her hands on the cool metal surface of Blue. Lance feels Blue push against him a bit at this moment. He breathes in, closing his own eyes and telling her, or at least trying to tell her, that it is fine. That he will always be her Paladin no matter who is inside her. He knows that Allura being able to pilot Blue could literally save lives. He feels Blue purr for him.

He opens his eyes and sees Pidge looking at him curiously. He starts to say something to her before he sees Blue opening her mouth. 

Allura walks inside. The Paladins have a few minutes to themselves at this moment while Allura likely tries to bond with Blue. Lance quickly catches up with Pidge and Hunk, asking follow-up questions about the astral plane that they had learned from the Zerfians. Keith is standing in front of Red, seemingly lost in his thoughts.

Allura finally appears again, smiling tightly.

“She will allow me to pilot her, but she misses Lance already,” she says.

“Can’t blame her taste! The two most beautiful people in the castle get to fly her!” Lance shoots back, winking at Allura.

She rolls her eyes.

“I think this is just temporary though. A temporary compromise until we find Shiro or a new…”

“Until we find Shiro and everything goes back to normal,” Keith interrupts her.

“Of course,” she says. “We don’t even know if this will work yet anyway. Lance needs to try to get the red lion to accept him. If Red doesn’t, then I think everyone should remain in their current lions.”

Lance looks up at the red lion. It is small, smaller than Blue. He secretly likes that his lion is bigger than Keith’s. He doesn’t allow himself to analyze why too closely, afraid that he may be like those guys who buy huge trucks they don’t need in order to overcompensate for something.

He also tries not to gloat about the fact that he is slightly taller than Keith. Sometimes when they are standing face-to-face, Keith has to look up ever so slightly and Lance’s heart races every time it happens. It isn’t even like he is a lot taller. Keith doesn’t even really have to move his head. It is more just moving his eyes slightly upward, but Lance still loves it.

And, oh, the day that Hunk tells them that he read Keith’s files from the Garrison. Not his medical ones, of course. Even Hunk has limits and medical records are private. But, just the general cadet form. Most of the information was uninteresting, except for his birthday. His glorious birthday in the fall making him a few months younger than Lance. Lance knew joy the day he found out Keith’s birthday.

Sometimes, when Lance is particularly frustrated, he remembers that Keith is just a baby. Keith was still in the womb when Lance was lifting his head and babbling. He was probably a newborn when Lance was rolling over. He couldn’t even walk when Lance was scooting around the house terrorizing his poor mother and father.  

Lance isn’t typically like this with people so he isn’t sure why Keith pushes his buttons. Or why he feels incredibly warm when he thinks about tiny baby Keith blinking into the world for the first time.

Or, probably screaming. Keith probably came into the world screaming.  

Lance musters all of his fake bravado when he faces the red lion. Red is the smallest of the lions, but somehow also the most intimidating to Lance, even compared with the black lion. The brief feelings he gets from the other lions during fights, the green lion’s thoughtful calculations, the stable power of the yellow lion, the steady pride of the black lion…the red lion’s are the most chaotic. Shots of anger and emotion and, at times, what almost feels like bloodthirstiness. Complex emotions that swept over Lance as Blue hums in the back of his mind.

He had to do this though. He had to try. He is annoyed though that he is the one to have to move. He understands it, but is just a little bitter that Hunk and Pidge sat there, just observers safe with their own lions. He wants to ask why Allura hadn’t even tried the Yellow or Green lions despite knowing the reasons why.  He wonders how stupid he will look if Red rejects him in front of Keith and everyone else.

With just a smidge of anger growing in his stomach, he walks up to the red lion, raising his fist to knock on the force field still up from Allura’s attempt.

His hand flails through the empty air as the force field drops, quickly.

“What?” he says, surprised. He turns and looks at the others once again. Allura looks hopeful. Pidge is grinning, which is scarier to Lance than anything else. Hunk gives him a thumbs up. Keith is unreadable, hair falling in his face, eyes dark.  

Lance turns back to Red and is surprised when she dips down, opening her mouth.  

He cautiously enters and half expects her to spit him out. He climbs in the chair and it feels strange. Red’s voice is crashing all around him and he can’t quite put a finger on how she feels right now. He leans his head back, closing his eyes and trying to listen to her. There is a weird swirling behind his eyes, a prodding, something that feels like amused curiosity. Suddenly, Red stands up.

“Hey,” he cries out, grabbing the controls. Though he tries to keep her on the ground, Red leaps up and toward the exit from the castle.

The exit opens and he can only assume that Allura is giving him the go ahead to bond. However, bonding in this case seems to mean Red doing whatever she wants while he helplessly flails.

She is fast. Really fast. Lance’s breath is taken away as she darts across the empty planet where they currently have the castle parked for the sole reason of figuring out next steps and the lion situation. It is a gross planet, mountainous, but with dull grey colors that only seem to mock the beauty of the mountains on Earth. Lance didn’t have much time to consider though as Red barrel rolls and then accelerates again, going faster and faster though steering just a tad too close to the mountainous structures.

Lance feels competing emotions, one of fear and one of excitement.  

The feeling in his head from Red now seems taunting. It irritates Lance. Of course, he would get stuck with the lion form of Keith. Of course.

He steadies himself, keeping his hands firmly on the controls. He waits until they approach, again, one of the peaks just a tad too closely.

_I’m your pilot_ he thinks as he jerks the controls, pulling Red’s head into the mountain.  The impact is harder than he expected and he momentarily wonders if he made a mistake.

Red seems delighted though, shaking her head and shouts of what might be laughter cascading over Lance’s body. She accelerates again, going straight forward before coming to an abrupt stop. This normally would not be an issue. The tech is just slightly out of what Lance’s understands, but they have some sort of gravity manipulation that keeps them in place in the lions. It also stabilizes them acting as more than just a seatbelt, but rather something that keeps them surprisingly steady and upright no matter what is happening with the actual trajectory of the lion.

However, the gravity can fail or turn off, depending, and that is just what Red does to him now. Her abrupt stop sends him flying into the windshield. He bangs hard against it and Red keeping enough of the gravity on to soften the blow is probably the only thing that saves him from splitting his skull open.

She is screaming with laughter now. Lance sneers and stalks back to the seat, gripping the handlebars. This time, when she tries to accelerate, he yanks on one side of the controls, forcing her head to turn. Instead of a straight path, they turn in circles instead. He isn’t sure how long this goes on for, twirling, Red laughing, his hands and shoulders aching in his struggle to hold her head so that all she can do is circle around herself rather than taking off again. Finally, she stops and sits down.  

He can’t unravel her feelings. He pushes against her again.

_Let me in, Red. Let me understand._

It is confusing though. He feels weird and tingly now, a bizarre, warm emotion spreading across his chest from the red lion.  

_You will do._

That part is clear though. She had accepted him. She had relinquished control at some point while they twirled in circles.    

_How or why,_ he asks, unable to stop himself.

She is silent for a moment and then chaotic impressions aggressively enter his mind. He is Altean suddenly, standing in a field, reaching toward a purple hand. Then, he is the purple hand. He sees a weird forest he doesn’t recognize. A child. A table and laughter. Someone kneeling, bowing their head. A scream. A cave with purple markings.

He puts his hands on his head. It is like being in a crowded room where everyone is having to shout to hear each other. Too much. Chaos. Too many images at once, too many feelings.

Then, he feels Allura. Her soul, a silvery feeling threading through him. Then Hunk. Pidge. Keith. A shadow of Shiro.   

“I don’t entirely get it.”

He can actually feel her roll her eyes in the back of his mind. Then, Keith suddenly body slams him. Except, of course, it isn’t actually Keith but rather Keith’s soul or whatever it is that ties them to the lions. It is the metaphysical equivalent of having their bodies smashed together or maybe even having their bodies become one. It is like Red is forcing Keith’s soul into his body. Lance trembles, unable to stop the intrusion. He can almost taste him, feel him in his bones, in the depths of his body. Then, a moment later it is gone, leaving him shaking.

_So, basically, Keith is so amazing he convinced you to give me a shot?_

Red is laughing again.

_Idiot._

That thought comes across clear as well, though it is playful.

Lance supposes it is time to head back to the castle. The way back is actually fun as Lance guides her through maneuvers at break neck speed. She is fast and adventurous and Lance concedes that maybe piloting her isn’t the end of the world even if his one true lion love will always be Blue.

When he exits, they are all looking at him with wide eyes, except Keith who is bright red and looking the other way.  

“Were you guys watching that?” Lance asks.

“We watched you go in circles for like, 15 minutes, dude,” Hunk says.  

“Did you guys bond?” Pidge asks.  

“Yes, we did. She told me she wants to know what it feels like to be flown by a real pilot,” He smirks at Keith.

“She probably thought you were me then.”

The comeback is weak and everyone knows it, including Keith. But, Keith looks off still, carefully not looking at any of the others.  

Lance only then notices that they are missing one person. “Where is Allura?”

“Coran called her away.”

Allura rejoins them at that moment, looking a few shades paler than usual.

“Paladins, you should join me in the main control room. We have a package.”

A package itself is not that exciting, but Allura’s tone alerts them that this is something important. They rush to the main control room where, true to her word, there is a gift sitting. It is an ornate box, silver with intricate carvings and shining jewels. There is a symbol that is clearly Galra, but then other symbols as well including one that Lance recognizes to be Altean.

“What is this?” Pidge asks.

“Did someone give us a present??” Hunk says.

“What if its news about Shiro?” Keith asks.

“What is in the box!” Lance yells, and thanks god when Pidge laughs. She is the only one who consistently gets his old movie references.

 Allura remains stone-faced next to Coran.

“Well,” Coran begins. “This box is an interesting one. It is either a real relic or a good mimicry of the design we used to have when the universe was at peace, when Altea and the Galra and all beings worked toward the same goal of peace. It would be used for the major civilizations to exchange gifts or other important tokens of peace and harmony.”

“But, we were afraid that it may be a trick and really house a bomb so…” Allura interrupts.

“So, we scanned it from every angle and can’t find any evidence that there is a bomb or any other malicious object inside the box.”

“So…” Pidge says.

“So, I think we should open it,” Coran says.

Allura reaches gently toward the box, gingerly taking the top off. There is a moment of nothing and then suddenly big, silvery butterflies explode out of the box. They are beautiful, big creatures with long flowing wings, glittering and lighting up in some fantasy version of Earth butterflies. They have long, wispy tails that light up like fireflies.  

Glitter and confetti pour out of the box with the butterflies creating what Lance will admit is a magical moment. The butterflies fly toward the ceiling, bringing some of the glittery material with them. Allura gasps, tears filling her eyes while Coran hugs her. Everyone is so focused on the show that no one except Lance notices the ornate envelope that falls near his feet. He bends over, picking it up, and reads the words on the front.

_Prince Lotor_

He rubs his thumb over the name and watches the butterflies fly around the room while Allura cries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank GOD. I thought we would never get to Lotor. 
> 
> Me: I want to do a slow burn fic that I can just have fun with for the next few months   
> Also Me: My slow burn fic is so slow I wanna get to the GOOD stuff NOW. 
> 
> Next Time: First contact with Lotor and a fanfic cliche I couldn't help writing


	9. Every Time I Watch You Serpentine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The paladins make first contact with Lotor who is not what they expect. Also, a fanfic cliche.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I almost feel like I am updating this fic too frequently, but it is summer, I am only working part-time, so most of my time is spent either doing something Voltron or playing Breathe of the Wild, ha ha. 
> 
> Pic refs of clothes linked in the end notes.

“Prince Lotor? What type of name is that?” Pidge says.

“I bet he is a douche. Who announces themselves with alien butterflies?” Lance responds.

“I don’t trust him already,” Hunk declares.

Keith remains silent, staring at the door where Allura and Coran had just exited. The butterflies are apparently some alien species that originated on Altea. Allura had thought them to be extinct. Her first priority was the safety of the creatures, gathering them up and now making sure they are comfortable in one of the rooms of the castle that was originally built to house wildlife. The castle apparently had a room for just about everything.

Keith is frustrated though he understands Allura and Coran’s desire to preserve the insects. It is a piece of home that no longer exists. He gets it. But, he has a weird feeling in his stomach looking at the envelope with Prince Lotor’s name on it. He is dying to open the envelope even though Allura told them to wait for her to get back.

It isn’t long before the door slides open and Allura and Coran enter again. After scanning the envelope, Allura decides to open it. A small electronic chip falls out.

“Oh. It is a chip. It will put us in contact with this Prince Lotor person, presumably,” she says.  

“Should we research who he is first?” Keith asks.

“I already have,” Pidge answers. “It says here that he is the son of Zarkon.”

There are audible gasps across the room.

“But, that he does not get along with him. He did serve in their military for a while, but had a falling out somewhere along the line and left. There isn’t much else known about him,” she continues.

“I didn’t know Zarkon had a son,” Allura murmurs. 

“Who would the mother be? It couldn’t be…” Coran says to her before dropping off.

“I don’t care if they don’t get along, I still don’t trust him,” Hunk says.  

“Ew, can you imagine Zarkon having sex.” Lance shudders.

“Right, its gross, but we should probably at least talk to him,” Pidge says.  

“Yes, Pidge. You are right. We need to at least hear why he is contacting us. Maybe we can wait a few days though.” Allura sighs.  

“I think we should call him now. It is just a phone call and I just feel like we need to see what he has to say now,” Keith interjects for the first time.

“He can’t track us right?” Hunk asks.  

There is a moment of silence before Allura nods.

“Perhaps you are right. He can’t track us. We are under no obligations to even continue the call if we don’t like what he has to say.”

They take an hour to get ready. This includes some talk about strategy. Allura would do most of the talking. Obviously they shouldn’t blurt out anything about currently missing their true leader or not being entirely sure they will be able to form Voltron.

It also includes putting their full armor on. It is partially Allura’s idea to do this. In what feels like a distant memory now, Allura gathered all of them before, even Shiro, and spoke about being the face of peace. That more civilizations were starting to and would continue to recognize them. They were going to be public figures and should consider how they appear to others. Apparently, Allura didn’t think much of their jeans and casual wear.

It isn’t something Keith is entirely comfortable with, but it hadn’t seemed like a big deal when Shiro was the main focal point. Who wouldn’t want someone like Shiro being the face of peace? He was everything a leader should be and looked the part. Keith was fine just being a soldier at his side. Now, that had changed though and Keith feels like it is his job to fulfill that hole left.

But, either way, Allura had started to insist on more diplomatic meetings and they were supposed to be in armor or the somewhat embarrassing formal attire that Keith assumes is the Altean equivalent of dress blues. Today, they put on their armor.

Allura initiates the call a few moments after everyone arrives.

Almost immediately, the call is answered. A galra pops up on the screen. Keith doesn’t know what he was expecting, but it isn’t this.  He is used to Galra that are furry or, for lack of a better word, not human. Some had bat ears, some had ridges on their heads, Zarkon kind of looked like a dinosaur, none of them were built like humans. Not that there is anything wrong with that. Obviously they are an alien species. It is actually surprising that Alteans look fairly human except for the ears and eye scales.

It’s just that it surprises Keith that the galra before them looks very human if you take away the purple skin and gave him a different haircut. He has sharp features, an easy smile already on his face, and piercing purple eyes that were different from the usual blank yellow that many Galra have.  He has long white-blonde hair dipping far enough down that the screen doesn’t even catch it all. Keith immediately wonders if he isn’t a pure Galra much like himself. He notes the pointed ears and wonders if there is Altean in Lotor’s blood rather than human.  

He shifts his weight, uncomfortable under the gaze of the Prince. Keith feels uneasy as the Galra smiles wider, showing off sharp canines.

“Princess Allura, it is an honor to meet you.” He appears to bow.

“Prince Lotor.” Allura does not smile in return. “Why are you contacting us? Why did you send Papiliones?”

“I am sure you know that the papiliones were a symbol of peace in the old days before my father laid waste to the universe. That is what I hope they symbolize for us today. My father has committed terrible atrocities to the world and I wish to help put an end to his legacy by helping Voltron.”

“Do you expect us to believe that?” Lance speaks up.

“Warrior of Voltron, of course I do not. I realize that by name and bloodline that I am an enemy to you. That does not stop my desire to bring peace to the universe and atone for my father’s sins. I only hope that I can eventually gain your trust and I will do all that I can to help Voltron further its goals.”

He smiles again, the same sharp smile, and Keith clenches his fists. He speaks like a politician. It actually reminds Keith of Allura, but he still does not trust this pretty stranger promising them an alliance.

“Trusting the son of Zarkon is something that Voltron will never do,” Allura says.

Keith looks over at her, mildly surprised at so definitive an answer despite his own misgivings.

“Princess Allura, I hear your concerns and I understand them. I only hope that eventually I can earn your trust. I know that you are good, noble people. I also know that you understand that not all Galra are bad, that it is our choices that make us who we are, that our destinies are not necessary tied to our pasts.”

Lotor looks directly at Keith here and grins wider. Keith wills himself not to squirm or even move under his gaze.

“I have also tried to help the Blade of Marmora when the opportunities allowed for me to do so. I hear that you have been working with those noble Galra? Unfortunately, they did not trust me either. However, I do have a present for Voltron and the resistance as a token of my dedication to peace across the universe and the withdrawal of Galra control over all the planets except our home ones.”

There is a flicker of movement from Allura and Keith works to maintain a neutral face. He had not expected Lotor to know about the Blade of Marmora, secretive as they are. Keith wonders if this is a sign that Lotor is serious about rebelling against his father or if more is known about the rebellion than he originally assumed by Galra like Zarkon. In hindsight, it seems obvious that they would know about them.

Another scene pops up on the screen, interrupting Keith’s thoughts. It is a beautiful dwarf spiral galaxy. It zooms in showing various planets.

“I have freed the X-3940s galaxy from Galra control. It is only a small galaxy without many natural resources, I have to admit. But, my resources are limited at the moment and I can only do my best. The eight planets that held life in this galaxy have been freed from our control and released back to their native inhabitants.”

There is a moment of silence.

“Do the Galra accept you as their new leader or did you experience resistance in freeing the galaxy?” Allura asks.

“Some do, but many do not so there was resistance. There are others who are vying for my position as the rightful next leader of the Galra Empire now that my father has been neutralized. Many of the upper-ranking Galra refuse to accept the change that I hope to bring to the world so the X-3940s Galaxy was won partially through battle. Even after they lost control, many still challenged me.”

“So what did you do with those Galra?” Allura asks. Lotor leans forward, still smiling.

“I executed them.”

*********

The call does not last for much longer. Lotor is insistent that they meet in person. How to meet is a matter of concern though.

“Like, we are not even considering trusting this guy, right?” Hunk starts.

“I am confirming now if that galaxy really was released from Galra control,” Pidge says.

“An enemy of our enemy is not necessarily a friend,” Lance says.

“I mean, do all of you not trust him because he is Galra? Because not all Galra are bad.” Keith tries very hard to keep his tone even and neutral.

There is only a momentary pause.

“No, we don’t trust him because he is the son of Zarkon, Keith. Keep up.” Lance shoots back at him.

“He still calls himself the Prince and calls Zarkon father. That makes me think he isn’t as disconnected from Zarkon and that identity as he would have us believe,” Pidge offers.

“And he just executed a bunch of Galra, his own people?” Hunk says.

“It is a war. Does anyone think we will get through this without shedding any blood?” Keith crosses his arms over his chest.

“Yeah, but that isn’t exactly our style if they were already captured and beaten,” Lance says.

“Allura?” Keith says.   

Allura had been curiously silent.

“I just don’t know. My instincts are telling me not to trust this person, but my instincts have been wrong before.” She looks pointedly at Keith.

“We should contact Marmora and see if he has tried to help them. He claims he did, right?”

“Yes, good idea, Pidge. There is also a way that we can beam him into the castle by himself with no way for him to know our coordinates or location. I have not decided if we should do so or not, but we could even beam him straight into a jail cell. I know it seems wrong to bring him into our home, but in some ways it is the easiest way to fend against a trap.” Allura explains.

 “I don’t want him in here,” Hunk says.

“Yeah, exactly, why are we even considering bringing the prince of hell here?” Lance agrees.

“We could just keep him in a cell though and get information from him,” Pidge says.

“Yes, I agree, Pidge. He could have information,” Keith responds.

“Keith, what do you think exactly?” Allura asks.

“I think that we need to give him a chance.”      

“Why?” Lance asks.

“We know not all Galra are bad. We have Galra actively helping in the resistance. We have Galra who have died, sacrificing themselves _for us_. We can’t immediately assume that he won’t be one of the good ones. If Allura says she can do it safely without us being tracked, then I think we need to hear him out.”

Allura sighs. She looks tired and Keith wonders if Shiro would be telling her to rest right now or some other words of comfort. He shifts uncomfortably, wondering if this is a hand on the shoulder moment.  

“Ok. Lotor has given us his location and it is actually near a pocket of planets that are currently not under Galra control and are situated in a good place in the universe. I think this would be a good place to meet him or bring him on board if we decide to do so. It is not in Galra territory and the polar energy is conducive to what I need to do to get him on board without him knowing our coordinates.”

“Well, I guess that does it then,” Lance says, looking unhappily at Hunk who looks equally displeased.  

“There is one other thing. On this planet, Oytd, there is a diplomatic ball happening. We have been invited. I initially said no, but I think, since we will be in the area, that it may be a good idea to attend,” Allura says cautiously.

Keith groans inwardly and catches Pidge’s eye who looks like she is doing the same.

Keith is one of those people who needs some time to think or decompress every now and then. Life as a paladin and especially since Shiro left had been the exact opposite of relaxing. There is always some meeting, ball, distress signal, some new worry or obligation. Keith understands that it is their role, their duty. But, he really, really does not want to go to anything that has “ball” in the title right now. He wants to kill a few bots in the training deck and then sleep. He also needs to start trying to connect with Shiro’s essence, apparently, to try to track him through the black lion now that she has accepted him as her pilot.

There is a lot to juggle and sometimes Keith feels the beginnings of panic ebbing into his body.  

“You do not have to dance and it is fairly casual so it shouldn’t be too bad. We also won’t stay for too long,” Allura says, probably noting that at least two members of the party are less than enthusiastic.

They are allowed some time in their rooms as Allura makes preparations. Keith starts listening to the “how-to” recording that the Zerfians gave him for the astral plane training. It is as vague as he worried it would be with the entire first part talking about energies swirling together and cosmic fate.  

It is soon time to stop the recording though and get dressed in the dress wear that comes standard for paladins. The outfit honestly isn’t that bad. It is more formal than Keith would ever wear, but the Altean fabric is comfortable and light. The color scheme is silver and black and somehow fit them perfectly. It is definitely better than the typical suit he had worn once or twice back on Earth. The only iffy part of the outfit was the gaudy cape that swung behind them as they walked. The capes are color-coded, of course, and make a fairly simple outfit a bit more fanciful.

Allura mentions that she will be wearing her own dress rather than the blue lion’s paladin dress wear. Lance perks up at this and Keith assumes that means he has the choice between the red and black cape since Lance would want the blue. Keith decides to wear the red one, still thinking of himself as the red paladin and assuming that no one would care that much that he isn’t wearing the black and purple one. The red cape is made of a beautiful, glittering fabric that is mostly translucent and has a design that looks like stars across the length of it.

He approaches the main control deck and sees everyone dressed just like him except for differing colors of cape. Keith thinks the blue one looks particularly beautiful, working well with the design overlaid on top and the silver of the outfits. Of course, it helps that Lance clearly loves the cape and seems to be trying to get it to whirl around him as he moves around the room.

Allura is wearing a simple dress that is one step nicer than the original dress she was in when they first met her. It is silvery with a few pink and blue accents. The dress effortlessly flows like their capes and Keith can’t help but think that she looks amazingly beautiful.   

Lance and Hunk are already practicing dancing together, but Keith is relieved to know that he doesn’t have to dance. He can dance.  He had been to clubs before on Earth and isn’t totally rhythm-less. Allura and Lance had also already taught all of the paladins a very basic waltz box step for more formal events that had been easy to learn. It isn’t entirely different from learning the steps to some of the training he did in martial arts at the Garrison.

But, Keith would prefer not to dance especially if he would be obligated to dance with strangers.  

They take a smaller ship to the Oytd planet and walk slowly up to a grand building that houses the diplomatic ball. As soon as they are within sight of the building, a few small, green aliens run over, holding up devices that flash brightly. Keith grabs his bayard at the same instant that Allura puts her hand on his arm.

“They are just taking pictures. Smile.”

“What? Why would they be taking pictures?” Keith responds.

“Pictures? Oh my god, are we like celebrities?” Lance squeals.

“I told you guys that we are becoming public figures. That means people might take pictures of us.”

It is uncomfortable to say the least. Lance and Hunk and even Allura seem to play it up for the cameras. Lance particularly appears one step away from treating it like a full-blown photoshoot. Pidge even looks like she is getting into it, smiling for the cameras. Keith pretends like they aren’t there though, looking straight ahead and keeping his eyes on the building.

The ball itself is actually a relief for Keith. He is expecting something huge and grand and intimidating. The place is nice, but just a bit more casual than he expects. Some are dancing, but many are not. There are aliens of all different types in the building, but everyone seems relaxed and friendly.

He spends most of the night with Pidge since neither of them particularly like to dance. They occasionally judge what someone is wearing or whisper about Lotor when no one else is around. Keith strikes up a few conversations with other aliens who he would peg as similar to him. Soldiers and not dancers. They make brief conversation about weapons and battles. Pidge finds one alien who turns out to be the tech expert for his team and is basically lost to Keith at that point. Allura, Lance, and Hunk occasionally take breaks from dancing and visit, sparkling with happiness from the dancing.

Keith enjoys that they look like they are having fun.

Lance is particularly in his element. He is a good dancer, a genuinely good dancer, with natural rhythm. By the end of a half hour, everyone in the room seems to want to dance with him. He eases around the dance floor, leaving every partner smiling, shaking his shoulders just enough to make the cape billow behind him easily when he turns in circles. Keith can barely take his eyes off of him.

He does though if for no other reason than to watch Allura. While Lance is a good dancer, it is easy to tell Allura is actually royalty. Sometimes he forgets that fact because she can also fight like the best of warriors. But, there is no mistaking the fact that she is a princess, or even a queen at this moment. She holds herself regally, floating through the dance steps gracefully.  

Lance and Allura dance together once and it isn’t only Keith that watches them. It seems like half the party turns to stare at the couple as they gracefully spin around the room. Even Pidge interrupts her conversation to walk over to Keith and watch them together.

“Lance is going to think he died and went to heaven,” Pidge whispers to Keith, snickering.

It is at this moment that a tall, pretty alien with long, pink hair that almost looks like she could be related to Nyma approaches them and asks Pidge to dance. She hesitates for only a moment before agreeing, clasping the pink alien’s hand and shooting a grin in Keith’s direction. Keith finds himself alone at this moment, wondering if it would be time to leave soon. He is tired even if the night hasn’t been awful.  

In the middle of his thoughts, he notices Allura approaching him with a serious face. Lance follows a step behind, watching carefully as she speaks to Keith.  

“Keith, I hope you will not be angry at me but I may have made a mistake.”

“What is it?” Keith immediately goes cold. His irrational brain comes to the worst conclusions first. That this is a trap. That Galra surround them. A voice deeper inside himself says that maybe she is about to say I made a mistake trusting you or letting you be the leader Voltron. _Keith, I hope you will not be angry at me but I may have made a mistake, I secretly hate you still,_ Keith imagines.

“You should dance at least once. It may offend some of the higher ranking diplomats if you do not. Just once will do though and you can choose any partner you want, including other Paladins or me. I am sorry for initially telling you otherwise.”

Keith sighs loudly. It isn’t that big of a deal, but he regrets that stupid Pidge is dancing with the pretty pink alien now. She would have been his ideal partner just because she also dislikes this type of stuff. They could be awkward and annoyed together.

He looks at his remaining choices. He eliminates Allura immediately. There is no way he is chancing dancing with her. He would be the laughingstock of the room next to her grace and ease of movement. He imagines stepping on her dress or her feet and shudders.

Lance is smirking at him beside Allura. Keith hesitates.

In the background, he can see Hunk browsing over the food options again. Keith takes a deep breath and then walks over to Hunk.

“Allura says I need to dance with someone or I will offend people. Will you dance with me?” he asks.

“Sure!” Hunk answers immediately, putting down his plate and grabbing Keith’s hand. Keith is grateful for Hunk. He had grown close to the other boy over the last few months. He trusts Hunk.

It isn’t that Keith has no idea how to dance, but he feels intimidated as soon as they reach the dance floor. He can already tell that people are watching, including Allura and Lance whispering to one another in the corner.

“So, do you prefer to lead or…?” Hunk asks.

“You lead. You are better at this,” Keith answers.

They clasp hands and Keith marvels at how much smaller his hand is compared to Hunk’s.

Hunk is not as good a dancer as Lance or Allura. But, he is still way more comfortable than Keith. Keith allows himself to be led around the room. He accidentally steps on one of Hunk’s feet at one point and cringes.

“Hey, Keith, just relax. Dancing is supposed to be fun. We have capes on and are surrounded by aliens. Capes, Keith. And aliens. Just have fun with it and look at me, not your feet,” Hunk says, smiling softly at him.  

Keith nods and relaxes. He looks in Hunk’s eyes and lets himself be guided. It isn’t long before he can genuinely say he is having fun. The music is nice and, now that he has relaxed, Hunk twirls him faster around the room, smiling when Keith shimmies his shoulders enough to make the cape whirl behind him just like Lance.

“Might as well give them a show,” Keith says, winking at Hunk. They can both feel most of the room looking at them.

“Can I dip you? Oh man, they will lose it if I dip you,” Hunk says.  

“Do it.”

Hunk dips him backward, smiling widely, and Keith can’t help but laugh in return, throwing his head back into the dip. Hunk supports him easily, hands on his back. 

There are flashes going on around them and Keith can’t even bring himself to care about that. He barely notices the flurry of alien paparazzi around them at the moment, or the weight of the stares he is currently receiving from Lance and Allura. He doesn’t think about the Prince of Galra waiting to board their ship or missing Shiro.

At this moment, Keith allows himself to lose himself in the music, just this once.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: All of this is a set up for an important conversation between two of the paladins and they finally meet Lotor in person.
> 
>  
> 
> [The Capes](http://chiffonandribbons.tumblr.com/post/155329292608/alexander-mcqueen-fw-2016)
> 
>  
> 
> I imagine the capes shorter though. More like waist length?
> 
>  
> 
> [Allura's Dress](http://stylefrizz.com/201403/2014-oscars-notable-dresses-styles-pictures/)
> 
>  
> 
> I actually have another dress picked out for Allura, but for a more formal event. I like what Lupita wore because she looked like a princess, but a comfortable princess who could move?
> 
>  
> 
> [Inspiration for the Paladin Dress Wear](http://nsanelilmunky.tumblr.com/tagged/futuristic-fashion)
> 
>  
> 
> General inspiration for the Paladin wear-more specific linked below. And yes, Pidge is wearing pants.
> 
>  
> 
> [The top two in this pic in particular for the Paladin Dress Wear](http://68.media.tumblr.com/a4d1b784eb59bf2fa5d1525126ab9741/tumblr_n8oedfKohh1sx8lboo6_500.png)
> 
>  
> 
> I like the top two though I am not sure what I would like best for the colors. I kept changing my mind where I wanted the black or silver to go. So, imagine whatever you think looks best lol. I also see them having actual sleeves and not gloves.


	10. Guess I'm a Bad Liar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The calm before the storm and the paladins finally actually meet Lotor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow 10 chapters already. It took me 10 chapters to even get one of the main relationships in this fic in the same room, lol. Thanks for all the comments, kudos, views, everything :) 
> 
> The next chapter probably won't be up until a week/week and a half. I am going on vacation and I will have some time to write, but it won't be the type of situation where I can edit and upload chapters.

It is soon after arriving back at the castle after the ball that Allura utters the words Keith has been dreaming of ever since the battle with Zarkon. Everyone can have some free time.

It isn’t really free time. He doubts anyone is actually going to just relax. Pidge and Hunk already seem to have a plan, scurrying off together and talking. Allura mentions starting to prepare stuff for Prince Lotor. Lance books it as soon as she dismisses them.  

Keith has a very specific plan. After some initial resistance to the idea of somehow astral projecting to find Shiro, he knows that that is exactly what he is going to do. He will astral project across the entire universe if he needs to.

The plan for the night is sleeping inside the black lion. The recording mentions the importance of dreaming for helping someone enter that realm. He is going to focus his spiritual energy, whatever that means.

He hopes the black lion will help him, but she feels cold to him as he makes himself comfortable in the chair. He is allowed inside, but it feels sad inside the lion. It is eerie, like something is wrong. Like he doesn’t belong. Which, of course he doesn’t. The true black paladin is missing. Shiro is gone.

As he tries to make himself comfortable in the lion, he imagines his soul and body entering the astral plane. The recording suggested a number of mental exercises for making this work. The suggestions included imagining your soul as a river flowing out into an ocean, imagining that your body is the top of an hour glass and the sand dropping down is your soul, and imagining yourself as a gust of wind.

For some reason, the one that appeals to Keith the most is the Alka-Seltzer tablet one.  Of course, they didn’t call it that, but the description reminds Keith of what an Alka-Seltzer tablet would do in a glass of water. He is supposed to imagine his body and soul are solid and tangible, but once placed in the “water” they fizzle and bubble, effervescent, dissolving into something greater than himself.

Keith can be an Alka-Seltzer tablet.  

So he slips gently into sleep sitting in the chair of the silent black lion, imagining his body dipping beneath the surface of water and dissolving, floating away.

*********

Keith opens his eyes to darkness. Someone is holding his hand. He looks up and sees a familiar shape in front of him. Shiro is there in his paladin armor facing away from him. He can see the back of his head. He tries to call Shiro’s name, but there is no sound. Shiro is walking now, pulling Keith along, leading him somewhere Keith cannot see. Keith follows, because that is what he does. He would follow Shiro anywhere. But, the longer he walks, the more frightened he becomes. He can’t make Shiro slow down. He can’t see Shiro’s face. He tugs on the hand and tries to ignore the voice inside himself that is crying out that _something is wrong_.

He tries to yell again, pulling his hand back, but Shiro grips him harder. Keith can’t see anything. No matter how hard he digs his feet into the ground, he can’t stop.

_something is wrong_

He changes tactics and tries to hurry up now rather than fighting it. He needs to see Shiro’s face. When he gets closer, he sees that Shiro doesn’t have a face at all.

_something is wrong_

Someone yells his name. He turns his head and sees Shiro to his left, looking at him with a mixed face of happiness and apprehension. Keith is overjoyed. Shiro is here. He found him.

_Somethingiswrongsomethingiswrongsomethingiswrongsomethingiswrongsomethingiswrong_

But someone still grips his hand, still drags him along. He looks back over and realizes that he was holding Zarkon’s hand all along.

_Wrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrongwrong_

*********

Keith wakes up with a start, sweating even in the chilly lion. He runs his hands through his hair and sighs. He wonders how much of that dream was him astrally projecting and how much of it was his weird galra insecurities emerging. It hadn’t felt like just a dream and the Zerfians had been clear that dreams are a type of projecting. 

The real Shiro, the one who had a face, had been alive and well. Keith counts this as a victory and chooses to ignore the Zarkon hand-holding session.  

He feels relaxed though despite the weird dream and realizes that he slept longer than he thought he would. Calling it a day, he grabs some food before heading back to his old home, the training deck. Allura mentioned bringing Lotor to the castle the next day and, by Keith’s calculations, it is close to next day. They had already discussed a game plan for dealing with the Prince, but Keith wanted to be prepared in other ways as well. He is starting to feel nervous energy at the thought of facing Zarkon’s son and killing a few bots always calms him down. 

He stops short when he sees a familiar figure standing in the middle of the training floor, holding an electronic device. It is Lance, seemingly unaware of Keith’s presence.  Keith watches him for a moment before walking over.

“Hey,” Keith calls out.

Lance looks at him, then back down to the device. “Look!” he holds it up for Keith and then scrolls. There are tons of pictures of Lance at the ball. There is even one where he is dancing with Allura where they look like a Disney Prince and Princess.

“What is this?”

“Some alien version of a tabloid, maybe?” Lance shrugs.

“Well, it is your dream come true then, right?” Keith answers, smiling. 

“But, there is something else we have to talk about.” Lance then scrolls to a different picture. Keith sees that it is a picture of him being dipped by Hunk at the ball. He cringes and wonders if the entire universe can see the picture.  

“Your form is all wrong,” Lance starts.

“What?”

“Wrong. All wrong. The way you are dipping puts too much of the work on Hunk or whoever your partner is. Also, you shouldn’t tense up like this. You could hurt your back.”

“Really? Who cares? I’ll jump in a pod if my back hurts.”

“You should care. You are the leader of Voltron and can’t even do a simple waltz box step with a dip. This may not be the last ball we attend, Keith.”

“So I am not qualified to be the leader because I am not a great dancer? Really Lance?”

“I didn’t say that. I am saying that maybe you need an extra lesson or two.”

“Ok, fine.”

“An extra lesson or two and I don’t mind being the one to teach you.”

Keith stares at Lance for a few moments. He isn’t great at reading people, but even he can see just a smidge of a blush running across the taller boy’s face.

“You don’t mind teaching me? Then why don’t you give me a few pointers right now?”

Lance’s eyes widen for a moment before he nods.

“I guess I can sacrifice my time to help you.”

He steps closer, eyeing Keith.

“So…”

“You can be the lead,” Keith says.

“Right. Since I am helping you. So, first you get into your frame.” Lance offers his left hand and places his right hand on Keith’s back, right near his shoulder blade. Keith remembers this part and lightly grabs Lance’s hand and puts his left hand on Lance’s shoulder.

“Now, there are different ways to do this and I prefer to keep my hand a little lower…for support.” Lance slips the hand that is on Keith’s shoulder down to his waist.

“For support…”

“Yes. Shut up. I am the dancer here.”

“Of course.”

Lance takes a deep breath. “Now, do you remember the box step, generally?”

“Yes. I step back with this foot, then left, then close my feet, then forward with this foot, then right, then together.”

“Uh, close enough. Now let’s go,” Lance begins leading him in the dance.

_Back, Left, Together. Forward, Right, Together._

“Do you remember how to do a turn?”

“Yes, same basic steps, but just a little diagonal.”

“Uh…Ok, whatever works for you.”

_Back, Side, Together. Forward, Side, Together._

Keith smiles up at Lance when they complete the turn. Lance is biting his lower lip.

“Now, to dip, control your body. Don’t just fling yourself backward. Here, bend your right knee and put most of your weight on it. Think of keeping your balance.”

He dips and then lets Lance guide him back up.

“See? That was good. Let’s continue practicing though. You need to relax a bit. You seem uncomfortable.”

“That is because I am.”

_Back, Left, Together. Forward, Right, Together._

They dance in silence for a few moments.

“Are you uncomfortable because of me?”

“What?”

“Do I make you uncomfortable?”

“That isn’t what I meant.”

“Why didn’t you ask me to dance with you instead of Hunk?”

_Back, Side, Together. Forward, Side, Together._

Keith is quiet. He can either play it off or be honest and some part of him actually wants to be honest right now. Maybe it is because he is currently waltzing with Lance, maybe it is his hand gently squeezing his side, maybe it is the way that Lance isn’t quite making eye contact with him right now. Maybe it is that Keith can genuinely call Lance his friend, even one of his best friends now. But, he wants to be honest.

“I thought you would make fun of me. You are also a really good dancer, just like Allura, so I felt like it would be more embarrassing being compared to you directly.”

Lance looks up at him.

“I wouldn’t have made fun of you.”

_Back, Left, Together. Forward, Right, Together._

“Oh come on, you would, you always do.”

“We tease each other, that is what we do, but that is different from making fun of you.”

“I know. It was just uncomfortable being so far out of my element while you looked like you were in it.”

Lance looks to the side, appearing to consider these words.  

“I have a confession to make-don’t be mad?”

_Back, Side, Together. Forward, Side, Together._

Keith involuntarily squeezes Lance’s hand a bit too hard. “What did you do…”

“I dared Allura to tell you that you needed to dance just once. That wasn’t actually a rule made by the planet or any high-ranking diplomats.”

“What? Seriously? Why would you do that?” Keith jerks Lance a bit harder into the next turn.

“Well, part of it was just seeing if I could make Allura go along with it and prank you. Now that I know she is game the castle is going to be a lot more fun by the way.”

_Back, Left, Together. Forward, Right, Together._

“And the other part of it was that you wanted to make fun of me?”

“NO! I don’t know. You were just sitting there and dancing is so much fun. I wanted you to have fun.”

“Stop acting like a saint, like you care if I have fun or not. You wanted to laugh at me.”

“I wanted you to ask me to dance with you.”

_Back, Side, Together. Forward, Side, Together._

Keith doesn’t respond until they have circled the training deck one more time. “Really? Why?”

“Because I wanted you to have fun. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

Keith sees two paths opening up in front of him. On one hand, fuck Lance for making him dance in front of people as a joke. On the other hand, Lance wanted to dance with him?

_Back, Left, Together. Forward, Right, Together._

“It’s ok. I did actually have fun. And there will be revenge. I have Hunk and Pidge on my side. We can make you and Allura’s lives miserable.”

_Forward, Right, Together._

“You guys look good in the picture though,” Lance’s voice trails off.

“Good?”

“Yes, I mean, your form still sucks, but you look happy. It is a cute picture.”

“Thanks?”

_Forward, Together_

They dance in silence for a few more minutes. Keith relaxes. Lance is a great dancer. He is considerate of Keith, timing their movements perfectly, guiding Keith lightly through the moves.

_Together_

Then, Lance drops a bomb. 

“What type of relationship did you and Shiro have before Voltron?”

Keith tenses and he can taste that Lance regrets asking immediately. He flinches back like he is expecting Keith to yell at him. It is a strange question anyway, the type of question that Keith would expect in a different situation. Like, some sort of court case or maybe some type of complicated romantic situation. It sounds mildly accusatory the way it is phrased, though Keith doesn’t understand why it would be or why Lance would care.  

Keith takes a few deep breaths. He realizes that he struggles to control his emotions when someone mentions Shiro now and that that isn’t helping anything. He should be able to discuss Shiro calmly without getting defensive or emotional.   

“A good one. You know, he helped me get my life on track. I don’t want to get into the full story now, but he was a really positive influence on me. I will tell you the full story later, ok? I promise.”

“Ok. But like…were you dating?”

Keith stops in mid-step, stumbling a bit since Lance continues moving. He laughs so loudly that the sound echoes in the room.

“Dating? What? God, no. That is a crazy question. What the hell?”

“Crazy?”

“Yes,” Keith can’t stop himself from laughing more.

When he calms down, Lance continues the dance.

“Why is it a crazy question, exactly? You guys seem close.”

“Yeah but it’s Shiro.”

“Would you date him if you had a chance?”

Keith searches Lance’s face which is, for once, stoic and expressionless as they continue to twirl around the room.

“No?”  

“You don’t’ sound sure.”

“Shiro is like my brother. I don’t have romantic feelings for him and he doesn’t for me.”

Lance looks down.

“Do you have romantic feelings for Shiro?” Keith digs his fingers into Lance’s hand reflexively.  

“No. I mean, I look up to him, but no.”

Lance still looks bothered about something and Keith cannot fathom what that might be. He nudges Lance a little on the side.

“Shiro and I never dated and I really do think of him like family. He is like my brother. However, I would be lying if I said I never had a little crush on him.”

Lance’s head snaps up.

“It was just a little childish crush. I mean, can you blame me? Is there anyone who has never had a crush on him?”

Lance smiles again, the mood lightening.  “Yeah I am pretty convinced that pretty much the entire universe has at least a low-key crush on him. I mean, have you seen him? He could crush me with his thighs and I would probably thank him.”

“I know!”

“Sometimes when meetings are really boring I will just stare at how pretty Shiro and Allura are.”

“How did we get the two hottest leaders in the universe?”

Keith doesn’t typically stand around and casually discuss how hot people are in any situation, but for some reason it works to lighten the weird mood that developed when Lance initially asked about them dating. Keith also realizes, on some level, that he feels comfortable enough around Lance to relax a bit and let go. Maybe he is the type of person who likes to stand around and talk about how hot people are. Maybe he likes having friends he feels comfortable enough around to gossip.

They joke for a few more minutes before Keith’s thoughts catch up to him and his laughter turns into something that sounds choked.

Lance immediately stops moving and pulls Keith a bit closer.

“It’s ok. It’s ok. We will find him.”

He wraps his arms around Keith. Keith eases into the hug and wonders if this is the first time they have hugged properly without one of them being injured or possibly dying. He feels comfortable in Lance’s arms. Like all he has to do is stay here and then everything will be ok.

_Together_

He pulls away a little, looking up at Lance’s face.

“Thanks, Lance.”  

Lance is biting his lower lip again when a door slides open.

Lance immediately steps away from him.

It is Pidge, hair messy and looking rushed.

“Allura thinks conditions are right to beam Lotor in now. You guys should come.”

This moment comes a bit too soon for Keith’s liking. He tries to get in the right head space, still wrapped in the comfortable afterglow of having a bonding moment with Lance that he can’t deny remembering. They quickly put their armor on and join Allura in an area of the castle that basically looks like holographic prison cells. They hadn’t really needed to use this area for anything yet, but no one is comfortable with letting Lotor into the castle unless he is beamed directly to a prison cell.

As soon as Keith approaches Allura, he learns that there was a message during the night from Kolivan who is currently elsewhere on some mission.  

They had asked the Blade if Lotor ever made contact with them. The message basically stated that, since communication is sometimes difficult due to the nature of the organization and being spies, they could not confirm nor deny that Lotor ever made contact with them. They knew about him, of course, and warned Voltron to take extreme caution. The message is short and inconclusive, unfortunately.

Keith processes the information for only moments before Lotor himself is in the cell, like magic. It is like Allura opened a mini-wormhole.  

“Princess Allura, Paladins of Voltron, it is an honor to meet you in person though I hope that one day we can meet outside a prison cell,” Lotor speaks smoothly, smiling.

Keith is surprised that the Prince is wearing casual clothing. It is white and loose-fitting, a simple tunic with pants. It is about what Keith would expect an alien prince to wear for a casual day. Keith tries to remember if he had ever seen a galra in casual wear before. The fabric looks light and casually expensive.   

He also recognizes that the clothing is a strategic choice on Lotor’s part. Keith had expected armor. In this, Lotor is theoretically less of a threat.

Theoretically.

Keith waits for Allura to finish her introduction before interjecting himself into the conversation.

“I am going to search him for weapons.”

Lotor smiles wider.

“Of course. Make sure that you are very thorough. I do not want any lingering doubts to remain.”

Lance follows Keith into the cell, standing a few feet back with his bayard, ready to act if anything goes wrong.  

Keith runs his hands over every inch of Lotor’s body that could feasibly hold a weapon, feeling smooth skin, soft hair, and lean muscles that could only come from someone who is used to battle. It is the body of someone who knows the importance of balancing strength and speed.  

He is mostly satisfied as he steps back without feeling any weapons.

“You didn’t check around my thighs very well. Again, I don’t want any lingering doubts and that is a common area to hide weapons,” Lotor speaks again, a hint of something in his voice that Keith misses.  

Keith admits that he might have neglected that area, trying to be sensitive to the fact that he is basically feeling Lotor up and the moment is a bit awkward. He immediately moves forward again, running a flat hand between Lotor’s legs.

“Ok! I think that is enough!” Lance growls behind him, pulling him back by the collar of his armor.

Keith steps back, satisfied that he would have noticed a weapon. He looks up at Lotor, close enough now to confirm that he is probably the most attractive galra Keith had ever seen. It is a strange thought to have in this moment, mere inches away from a potentially deadly threat. He just cannot get over how much Lotor does not look like Zarkon though. Not at all.

Seeing Lotor up close only confirms Keith’s beliefs that the prince is not a full-blooded Galra.

He also wants to believe that Lotor is on their side or at least that they should genuinely hear him out. However, as Lotor grins down at him, something tells him to stay away, that danger lurks behind the pretty face of the prince.

But, on the other hand, the prince had compromised for them quite a bit. They could, feasibly, just keep him locked up or execute him or torture him for information. But, he had willingly allowed himself to be beamed into a prison cell without armor or weapon to protect himself.  

Keith wants to believe in more galra that have turned away from Zarkon’s influence. That being galra didn’t necessarily make you bad. He already has evidence with Marmora. He wants more of that evidence now.

He is torn between his instinct to lock this prince away and throw away the key and the desire to trust, to have Zarkon’s own son working against him.  

“So,” Lotor says, leaning down just a bit toward Keith.

  
“What do we do now, Paladin?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: The paladins realize they cannot trust Lotor, keep him locked up forever, and Keith and Lance run off into the sunset.  
> JK  
> Real Next Time: Dialogue heavy chapter of conversation with Lotor with a bit of the next mission set up as well. The next mission will be a very important one. 
> 
> Also, I laughed and laughed and laughed about writing the ball dancing fanfic cliche except instead of dancing with Lance Keith dances with Hunk. Then, after I wrote it, I felt sad that they didn't dance so enjoy this self-indulgent chapter :p Initially, they just talked without dancing.


	11. That We Shoot Across the Sky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance has a great day ruined only by the appearance of a pretty purple prince

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took longer than I expected to get out, but the last two weeks have been not good for me. Next chapter is planned for early Saturday so we should be back on schedule. 
> 
> Anyway, we need to talk. I have this weird feeling that Lotor and Keith are going to end up being related in the show. Is it weird to like...ignore that for a fic? Because I am not going to finish this before August 4th and Lotor and Keith are planned to have some very...non-family like interactions coming up :p 
> 
> Maybe it is a stupid worry and they won't be, but I feel like they kind of share some features? And also why make Keith Galra and then not somehow make him related to Zarkon, lol. I don't know.

 

 

In the span of about 24 hours, Lance experiences the highest highs and the lowest lows of being alive. He qualifies the current moment, awkwardly having some form of Altean tea with the son of Zarkon, to be one of the lows. However, everything else about the last day makes Lance believe that the entire universe conspired to reward him for his inherent awesomeness. No more being overlooked or underappreciated. Some karma he accumulated in a past life floods his life all at once, finally.

 

It starts with the diplomatic ball which is less fun than flying for a mission, but also more fun for him than probably any of the other paladins. Allura emphasizes the fact that they are becoming public figures now and need to forge connections to other alien species. Lance takes this as a sign that he is allowed to schmooze and that is something that feels very comfortable to him. An entire night where the goal is to dance and flirt with as many aliens as possible? And it counts as work in Allura’s eyes?

 

Perfect.

 

He even gets to wear a breezy, glittery cape that catches the light when he twirls. Forget the others for laughing at the capes. He loves it. He wants to wear the cape all the time. He wants it to be a part of the regular Paladin armor. He wants to storm a Galran ship, cape billowing in the wind.

 

Lance dances the night away with aliens every color, size, and shape imaginable. Sometimes he can’t even entirely understand how he is supposed to dance with an alien, but he makes it work with a smile. For example, a yellow centipede-looking alien with so many arms he has no idea where he is supposed to grab takes the lead for him, thankfully. Lance flirts, smiles, compliments, and makes pointed small talk and, by the end, even the centipede wants to dance with him again. By the end of the night, random aliens are actually waiting their turn to dance with him.

 

Flying high and feeling great about himself, he tempts fate by asking Allura to dance. He half-expects her to say no, but is surprised when she nods and smiles at him. He is dimly aware of everyone watching when they dance. He is more aware of just how beautiful Allura is.

 

She compliments his dancing and tells him that he will be invaluable for diplomatic meetings. She seems genuinely pleased with him which is not something that always happened. I mean, it isn’t like she is never pleased with him, but Lance usually isn’t the one singled out for special praise.

 

She even mentions a special mission that she thinks only he can achieve for Voltron and promises to tell him more about it soon.

 

Yes, all in all, everything’s coming up Lance.

 

She also gossips with him about some of the aliens surrounding them, leaning in and whispering close to his ear. That one in the polka dot dress has been staring and blushing at Hunk all night. That one with the rainbow antennas just broke up with her husband. That one in the white pants is drinking too much and his partner is totally embarrassed.  Lance dies on the inside, in a good way, as they giggle about the aliens that surround them.

 

Sometimes Allura is more like a princess, a type, a character to him rather than an individual with feelings just like him. This is the closest they have come to bridging that gap. At some point, he casually apologizes for flirting with her and she accepts, equally as casually though sometimes he gets that the flirting annoys her. As they dance, he feels his urge to nervously flirt with her fade into the more comfortable possibility of just talking to her like she is a person.

 

He also enjoys that she is having fun. Everyone had seen the strain on her face growing day-by-day as she struggled with Shiro being missing and trying to bond with Blue. You know, in addition to all the other crap like all her people being dead and the Galra taking over the universe.

 

Seeing Allura giggly and smiling makes Lance feel lighter than he has felt for weeks.

 

And he knows he is pushing his luck, he does, but he can’t help himself. But, he has beaming Allura in his arms, an entire room of aliens wanting to dance with him, and, screw it, he is wearing a cape and loving it. He looks over and sees Keith by himself. Pidge is actually dancing with some beautiful pink alien.

 

 _Go Pidge, get it_ , Lance thinks briefly before focusing on Keith. The temptation is too much. He wants to see Keith awkwardly dancing. He wants to dance awkwardly with Keith.

 

“Allura,” Lance whispers as they dance around the room.

 

“Yes?”

 

“Tell Keith he has to dance.”

 

“But that would be a lie?”

 

“I dare you.” Lance isn’t entirely sure this concept works with aliens or if it would translate, but from the

way her eyes narrow and she grins, perhaps it does.

 

“Do you think he will get mad if he finds out?”  


“He won’t find out…come on, it will be hilarious!”

 

Allura grins mischievously and then turns, walking toward Keith. Lance listens in while Allura tells Keith, very seriously, that he needs to dance.

 

Keith, of course, takes it very seriously probably never considering the idea that Allura was dared to lie to him. 

 

Lance hopes Keith asks him to dance, but half-expects him to ask Allura. Surprisingly, he asks Hunk, but after momentary disappointment at not being chosen by Keith, Lance thinks this works in his favor. He gets to watch Hunk and Keith be adorable dancing together and, holy shit, he has the most adorable friends in the universe.

 

That night, Lance goes to bed thinking about Allura, Hunk and Keith, Pidge, and dancing and thinks, _wow it cannot get better than this._

 

The universe is dedicated to proving him wrong though and Lance’s life indeed gets better.

 

He isn’t entirely sure why he goes to the training deck the next day. He holds the tablet Pidge gave him, idly flipping through pictures of the night before posted on some weird alien website when Keith shows up. He isn’t even entirely sure why he starts teasing Keith for being a bad dancer. He isn’t, really. He isn’t a great dancer, but not so bad that he needs extra lessons. Maybe some deep part of his brain hopes that Keith will come to him for extra lessons. Lance isn’t expecting it though when Keith asks for a dance lesson immediately. He forgets sometimes how intense Keith is with anything training related.

 

Lance can barely believe his luck as he wraps his hand around Keith’s waist. Maybe he is dead. Maybe the spider actually killed him and he just didn’t realize it and now he is in heaven, a place where everyone wants to dance with him and flirt with him. A beautiful world where Keith shyly holds his hand and looks up at him, waiting for his dance expertise.

 

Lance shakes himself out of the urge to pinch himself and proceeds to guide Keith around the room. Out of everyone in this new, strange family they had forged, it feels like everyone is closer to Keith compared to Lance. Maybe not Pidge. Or Coran. But everyone else, yes.  Shiro makes sense. They have history that goes back further than Lance even knew Keith. He can even handle the fact that Keith bonded with Hunk while on a mission. Of course Lance wants two of his best friends to be best friends too.

 

But Allura? How did Allura somehow get closer to Keith? Or Keith closer to Allura? He had caught them having conversations that seem way too intimate, way too comfortable. When did they become so close?

 

It isn't like him and Keith aren’t friends, but Lance knows very little about what makes Keith tick or what he is really like. He enjoys teasing Keith and being teased by Keith, but these exchanges also keep them at arm’s length sometimes. He doesn’t really know who Keith is, _beneath the surface_ , to use the words of the Zerfians.

 

Lance can only assume that Keith is finally succumbing to his undeniable charms when he not only agrees to dance with him alone, but also opens up to him in a way that never happened before.

 

They have a pretty honest conversation where Keith admits that he thinks Lance is laughing at him sometimes. Which doesn't make Lance feel good and he hopes that he hasn't come across as a mean girl, but Keith seems a little vulnerable as he says it and, oh boy, Lance is happy that Keith feels comfortable enough to discuss this with him.

 

He also clarifies his relationship with Shiro as one that was not and will not be romantic. Not that it matters of course.

 

It really isn't any of Lance’s business who Keith or anyone else in the castle wants to date.  It really doesn’t matter. Keith is free to date anyone he wants, Shiro or Allura or some other alien or human.

 

Lance doesn’t care.

 

Of course, Allura is going to be his one day. She deserves a true prince like him and not someone who forgets to shower sometimes like Keith.

 

But Keith can date whoever he wants. Lance doesn't care at all.  

 

He doesn't even entirely understand why he is so hung up on Keith and Shiro's relationship. He can try to play it off as curiosity. He can pretend like he cares only so much as it may affect Voltron. An uglier part of him wonders if Shiro plays favorites sometimes because there may be something more going on between him and Keith.

 

Lance recognizes that Shiro is a good leader though and can't quite convince himself that he is just worried about favorites being played.

 

But something about Shiro and Keith potentially being together bothers him. In a particularly masochistic moment one night, he imagines Keith and Shiro holding hands or sneaking kisses after missions and his stomach twists.

 

It doesn't bother him though, not really. He isn't jealous at all, not of how close they seem to be and not of how softly Keith looks at Shiro sometimes.

 

It doesn't bother him at all.

 

Ok sometimes it does but not now not when Keith actually leans into his hug and allows Lance to comfort him while dancing. Not when he thanks him for comforting him without sarcasm. Not when he actually laughs at his jokes.

 

He wonders if Shiro ever danced with Keith, marveled at how small his waist is as he dipped him, indulged in smelling his hair just a bit while they hugged.

 

Yes, the last 24 hours had been amazing and Lance feels like the entire world is at his fingertips.

 

However, all good things must come to an end, what goes up must come down, life is a carousel my friend, and all that jazz. Lance should have known that one of the best days of his life would be followed by an ominous black cloud descending over him.

 

Lance isn't sure about many things in life.

 

He isn't sure why the line he is standing in is always the slowest one.

He isn't sure how taxes work.

He isn’t sure how to use a semicolon properly.

He isn't sure what happens after you die.

 

But he is sure, very sure, unequivocally, without a doubt, sure down to the marrow in his bones, to the very core of his being, that he hates Lotor.

 

He _hates_ Lotor.

 

What was just a crawling of his skin during the previous video call quickly flourishes as soon as the prince appears in the cell. He stands with an easy, smug attitude, a mark of true royalty.  He is very pretty and Lance can admit this. He can admit that his hair is silky and his face to die for.

 

But it is one of the few times that Lance feels absolutely no urge to flirt. It isn't the same as with Allura who is also royalty and very attractive. Or maybe he is just telling himself that.

 

Because sometimes he doesn't entirely feel comfortable around Allura. But his feelings about Allura are never dark or like he shouldn’t trust her. Lotor doesn’t even have to open his mouth and Lance already knows he will never, ever trust this alien.

 

A clawing feeling settles in his chest as he listens to Allura and Lotor trade niceties. Growing dislike, but also a tinge of fear that he hates himself for. Lance doesn’t fear anything. He is fearless. He is a powerful warrior. He is a paladin. He definitely doesn’t fear petty stuff like death or pretty Galran princes with calculating eyes.

 

He sees Lotor and knows he is someone that could gut him without a second thought, without an ounce of hesitation or regret.

 

That behind the politeness and smiles is a cold interior, a predatory spark that would only see anyone lesser as something to eliminate as easily as one would throw away a dirty napkin.

 

He somehow seems dangerous even in a cell wearing light, casual clothes without weapons while they are wearing armor and have their bayards out.

 

He doesn't want this galra near their home, the castle. He doesn’t want him near his friends, his family. He wants to shoot him out an airlock and call it a day.  

 

Keith decides he wants to check him for weapons which makes sense on one level, but every cell in Lance's body screams as Keith gets close to the prince. Alarms go off in his head, red lights flash, his hands tense reflexively around his bayard. Part of him just wants to shoot him. Screw allies. Screw “there are good galra out there.” This one is not.

 

Lance watches closely and prepares to shoot as Keith runs his hands over Lotor's body. The prince infuriatingly makes eye contact with him and seems to smirk as Keith searches. Lance boils and eases his finger onto the trigger. All he can think is that Keith is too close. A blade to the neck or chest and Keith is gone. Or Lotor could probably just use his hands and break his neck or claw him up. When Keith leans down to check his calves, his neck is exposed, milky white beneath the lavender form of the prince.

 

 _Danger, danger, danger_ Lance’s senses scream.

 

Then Lotor seals the deal with Lance’s hatred. Moves himself from possibly being irrationally hated to deserving the hate. He flimsily tells Keith that he needs to check his thighs more closely and, infuriatingly, Keith takes it at face value and agrees.

 

Lance can tell that Keith completely misses the subtext of the request. He does that sometimes. Not all the time, but there is an occasional innuendo or reference that Keith just misses. It is adorable to Lance. He senses that Keith didn’t exactly have a huge friend group on Earth and that he also lived alone for a long time so he gets why he might miss social or verbal cues sometimes. It is part of what makes Keith, Keith and it isn’t a big deal.

 

Except for now. Now it is a big deal.

 

 _Jesus Christ Keith, read the room_ , Lance thinks as Keith immediately drops down and starts groping at Lotor’s thighs.

 

Then something happens that moves Lotor from deserving the hate to possibly being Lance’s lifelong blood-sworn enemy. After the fact, when discussing the matter with Hunk and Pidge, they both let Lance down by denying that it happened. Pidge shrugs and says she didn’t see it. Hunk says maybe he just had something in his eye. He can tell they both think he is exaggerating even though they are being patient with him. Disappointments, both of them. He loves them but they are. They don't see what Lotor does that makes Lance want to shoot Lotor in the face.  

 

The prince turns his head slightly and makes eye contact with Lance again and then winks at him just as Keith runs a hand up his thigh.

 

A strange flavor of anger rushes through Lance’s body. No one is allowed to mess with Keith this way, not on his watch. Lance can't stand it and grabs Keith, yanking him backward.

 

From this moment on, Lance makes sure that he is between Lotor and Keith at all times. He thinks he is being subtle about it, but Keith’s side eye at one point indicates that maybe he is not.

  
After a quick discussion away from the cell, Lance is vetoed when it comes to giving Lotor a chance, seemingly no one else picking up on the warning signs like he does. They allow him out of the cell and walk him toward the dining room. Lotor moves slowly with his hands visible at all times. Lance recognizes that Lotor is trying very hard not to come across as a threat, but warning sirens still blare in Lance’s head.

 

There is an awkward moment near the table where no one knows where to sit. Allura shows Lotor to the head of one side of the table and then settles into the head at the other side. Coran sits next to her. However, everyone else fumbles for a moment when deciding a seat from here. Keith infuriatingly takes a seat next to Lotor. Lance bristles, briefly wondering if he should sit next to Keith or next to Lotor and chooses sitting next to Lotor and across from Keith. He feels closer this way.

 

Once their shuffle is over, Hunk sits next to Lance and Pidge settles next to Keith.  

 

“So, you did serve Zarkon for quite some time, right?” Allura begins after Lotor gives some empty compliments about the castle and tea.  

 

“Yes, I did. I regret to say that. I was raised to believe that everything he did was just and correct. It wasn’t until I grew older and started serving in the military that I saw the destruction, the horror of a divided world. I started to question and then eventually had a falling out with my father. We actually hadn’t spoken in years by the time I realized that Voltron had been formed again.”

 

“What was Voltron to you?” Coran asks carefully. Lance is curious as well. He assumes Lotor would have known Voltron isn’t just some legend like many other alien species assume it to be.  

 

“My father described it as a weapon that was rightfully ours before being stolen from us. He never stopped obsessing over it or the black lion. I have come to realize that Voltron is a weapon of peace, not something that is owned by the Galra, but rather something that can bring harmony to the entire universe. I have also heard much about Voltron’s new brave Paladins too. For example, Hunk is it? You basically saved one of the last Balmeras by yourself?”

 

“Well, with everyone’s help of course and especially Allura,” Hunk responds.

 

“Of course. And Pidge, you hacked through my father’s technology better than Galra who actually work on that technology. So many want to get their hands on you just for those skills.”

 

“Galra tech is no big deal. It was harder trying to figure out MyMathLab!”

 

“Not to mention Allura, the tales of your kindness and strength precede you. It is an honor being in your presence.”

 

His gaze settles on Lance. He quirks his lips before moving down the line to Keith. Lance narrows his eyes and grips his tea cup. He tries very hard to ignore the plume of insecurity that rises suddenly to choke him.

 

“And you. Keith. A fierce warrior. Apparently, you can fly as well as any of our top trained pilots and fought my father yourself. Most impressive. You are also part Galra, if I am not mistaken.”

 

He says it easily, nonchalant, like it is a known fact that everyone has already processed and forgotten.

 

There is an uncomfortable silence. Lance watches Keith grit his teeth and then relax again.  

 

“How did you know that?”

 

“Through sad means, I am afraid, someone from the blade of Marmora was found and tortured for information. Such noble beings to fight against the empire. The information caused quite a little stir.”

 

“Yes, I have some galra in me apparently.”  

 

“Do you know how?”

 

“No. My dad was human as far as I could tell. I never knew my mom.”

 

Lance feels his irritation hit a boiling point and speaks out. “We could ask you the same question since you are clearly not pure Galra.”

 

A flash of anger crosses Lotor’s face before he eases into a smile again. Lance can tell he hit a sensitive point, no matter how much Lotor forces a smile.

 

“It is true. I am not. It is why I am so interested in Keith. Half-breeds like us are fairly rare and unfortunately not entirely respected by the Galra. They call us _onsa_ behind our backs, which I believe would translate to something like impure for all of you. I also do not know my mother and grew up only knowing my father. He would not speak of her to me and I could never get anyone to tell me what happened. I don’t even know what my other half is though I have considered that it might be Altean.”

 

He pauses and looks at Allura. She squeezes her cup tightly. Her face turns red and Lance notes the tenseness in her shoulders.

 

“I can’t believe any Altean would ever touch Zarkon,” Lance says, ignoring the looks Hunk and Pidge are shooting him.  

 

Lotor swings his eyes back to Lance and stares for a moment before laughing.

 

“I cannot deny that there is some truth to your words. But, never forget that there was a time when Alteans and the Galra worked together in harmony. It has not always been the bloody despair that my father brought upon this world. I also may not be Altean. I just thought there were some passing physical similarities. The Alteans are also a noble, beautiful people who stood against my father’s oppression so there is a part of me that would like to be Altean. There are certainly other alien races who would give me similar physical attributes though. I will likely never know my exact origins.” He pauses here and drops his head and Lance hates him.

 

It is all too calculated. He seems to know the exact correct answers that they will want to hear for every question. He is showing emotions that make sense, but feel artificial to Lance. Like, how convenient that he wants to be Altean because of how great they are in front of Allura.

 

He sees Keith lean forward though, at full attention.

 

“I know the feeling…Do you know if any Galra have been to Earth? Are there other mixed species like us?” Keith’s wide eyes are shining.

 

Lance wants to punch something. Or someone. Lotor.  

 

“I am unsure if we have ever been to Earth unfortunately. I do not know anything about your possible origins either. I apologize for my lack of knowledge in the matter, but I do not even know details about my own life. However, there are scattered mixed-species Galra. Unfortunately, like I said, they are not often looked at kindly so some hide it if possible. That, or they are mistreated in various ways.”

 

Lotor pushes his tea cup to the side.

 

“Have you always felt like you didn’t quite belong, Keith?”

 

Lance shudders when Lotor says Keith’s name. He opens his mouth to say something, but notices Keith nodding immediately.

 

“Yes, always. Is it the same for you?”

 

“Yes, even when I was younger and still had my father’s approval. I am not ashamed of what I am, but this world is not always kind to those who are different.”

 

“Yes, exactly!”

 

Keith clenches his fist and smiles grimly.

 

“So, tell me more about…” Keith continues to ask questions with something like hope flitting across his face. Lance is quiet now, a sinking feeling in his stomach, the dark cloud settling increasingly over their heads as he watches Keith and Lotor _bond_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: Lance's special mission from Allura, some lions, and introducing the dreaded "it was supposed to be a simple mission" arc.


	12. I Want Something Just Like This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance goes on a special mission for Allura and then hates Lotor some more

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, some explanation about this chapter. I tend to fixate on stress-relieving hobbies and for a long time that was celebrity gossip. Like, I used to come online and read gossip and blind items all night after school lol. Anyway, my favorite site used to be Oh No They Didn't and the name of the planet they are on is Oytd, which is my play on that name (Oh Yes They Did).  
> Anyway, I had too much fun writing this and it somehow became 4K words and that was with me trying to hold back. And yes, all the gossip (including about the paladins and Zarkon and even Lotor) is inspired by real celebrities :p Like, minus the killing parts of course.

“I don’t trust him and I never will.”

Lance doesn’t even wait for everyone to sit down in the control room after Lotor leaves to say his piece.

“I don’t like him either, but I am not sure rejecting him outright is the correct choice here,” Allura responds.

“I think you are judging him too quickly. He didn’t seem that bad to me,” Keith adds.  

“Oh, right, you totally aren’t saying that just because you guys bonded over some Galra blood you supposedly have.” Lance crosses his arms and sits back, ignoring the glare that Keith shoots at him.  

“He didn’t seem that bad to me either. I mean, I am not saying we trust him with our lives, but I don’t see why we trust the Blade if we aren’t even going to give Lotor a chance,” Pidge says.  

“Hunk, what do you think?” Allura asks.

“I can see both sides. I definitely don’t think we should trust him entirely. But, he would be a valuable ally and we could possibly use him even if we do keep him at arm’s length. I think he is too valuable, like the Blade, to reject working with him entirely. Even if he is an enemy, then I would rather keep him close than have no idea what he is doing especially if he is playing at being our friend.”

Hunk always seems to know the reasonable thing to say and it makes sense when he says it. Lance knows it even in his frustration at the situation. He doesn’t like Lotor though and he especially doesn’t like Lotor’s plan, which is to basically become the next accepted ruler of the Galra Empire and then free everyone afterward.

I mean, come on, they would basically be helping Lotor become the next Zarkon and then just hope he keeps his word afterward to free everyone.  

There really isn’t anything he can say to change their minds though.

When the meeting is adjourned, Allura grabs Lance’s arm as he tries to leave.  

“About that special mission I mentioned at the ball. Do you know what the Oytd planet deals in, specifically?”

Oytd is the planet that held the diplomatic ball. It is also the place they had been hovering around for the last few days.

He shakes his head.

“Information. They broker information. A lot of it is basically what you would call gossip, but I would like to open a line with them. We could potentially use this line to spread information or get information.”

“And you want me to do this?”

“I think you are the only one who can. You are good with people. You are good at making friends. I would like you to try. Even getting a contact with no information would be a victory. But, they won’t just take a complete outsider, like you are. I would normally offer you some information to sell, but I am not sure what would work for the crowd currently down there, plus most of my information is dated by, well, about 10,000 years.”

“So I basically just need to get a bunch of gossips to like me?”

“Yes, essentially.”

Lance cracks his knuckles. _Easy Peasy._

And that is how Lance, or, for the night, Lancius, finds himself in casual clothing Allura found in the castle and dropped in the middle of a lounge on the planet. The bar is actually pretty classy looking with a chandelier in the middle of the large room and modern-looking black furniture next to light colored wooden floors. It looks like the type of place the Garrison officers would go to while the cadets traipsed down to a place called “Porky’s” that had paper towels for napkins and served all you can eat pork rinds.

He orders some purple drink and casually looks around. Many aliens are chatting happily, but in clear groups that Lance understands from being in high school. _Cliques_ , he thinks.  

He had to find a way in, a way to get them to trust him. Unfortunately, all of Allura’s information is old. Gossip is fleeting by nature. He feels uncomfortable using the gossip he does know. Zarkon being in a coma isn’t exactly a good, neutral ice breaker. He isn’t even sure how they feel about Zarkon. He isn’t supposed to let them know he is a paladin either.  

So, Lance listens, and waits for his chance.

He gets close to one table and can overhear them just a bit. It is a group of three. One looks just a bit like a rat with whiskers and a squat frame. She is blue. There is a pink one as well or maybe closer to rose gold. She looks like a robot and bears a similarity to C-3PO. The final one is red and hairy.

“I heard he is sleeping with the nanny.”

“Oh my god! Why would Marisol stay with him?”

“Who knows?”

Lance takes a chance, hoping gossip is the same everywhere.

“Did you know,” he says as he bellies up to the table, “that the nanny is pregnant though? Marisol is going to finally leave him because of it…”

They turn and stare at him. There is an uncomfortable moment where Lance thinks he guessed wrong. Yes, it is a gossip planet, but according to Allura they are usually pretty accurate. What if the nanny isn’t pregnant. What if the nanny couldn’t even get pregnant. What if Marisol is actually someone they know and not some alien celebrity.

“Oh…wait,” the blue rat says. “I think I heard that too! Right? Pregnant…with twins right?”

“Yes!” Lance exclaims. “Two babies, poor Marisol especially after she wanted another child and couldn’t…” It is a shot in the dark again. He wants them to see him as one of their own though. He wants to seem like he has information.  

The hairy red one perks up.

“She wanted another baby? Oh my god!”

They are all staring at him now, eager.

“Yep, they tried and it didn’t happen. I think he was cheating with the nanny for a long time though, even before they tried for another one.”

“Yes, he was, we saw pictures like, two years ago of him walking with her and he was just too close to her, like you could tell. There were _vibes_ in the pictures,” the Rose Gold one says, literally shining with excitement.  

She moves over and Lance finds himself seated at the table, exchanging smiles with his new friends and thanking god that the same gossip seems to exist for celebrities in any galaxy.

“You are new here, aren’t you?” Rose Gold asks.  

“Yeah, I was working in a different galaxy for a while. It was a good job, but no one was interested in information like here. My name is Lancius.”

“What? Were they simpletons? My name is Oph by the way,” Rose Gold says.  

“Yes, terrible simpletons,” Lance responds.

“My name is Raph,” Hairy Red adds.  

“Mine’s Bol,” Blue Rat adds.  

Lance hopes he wouldn’t have to remember the names, instead liking his own monikers for them.

“We need to catch you up then,” Rose Gold begins. “Did you know that Hathie and Wilmehsu are getting a divorce?”

Lance gasps appropriately. “I heard a rumor but I wasn’t sure if it was true or not.”

“Didn’t he write his last collection about her? This one actually makes me sad!” Hairy Red exclaims.

“Yes, the music was great too. I thought they would make it,” adds Rose Gold.

“I knew they wouldn’t last. She has a drinking problem,” Blue Rat says.

“No, HE has a drug problem,” Rose Gold says.

“Did one of them cheat?” Hairy Red asks.

“I heard they both did,” Blue Rat responds.

“But weren’t they in an open relationship? Like, I thought they had an agreement,” Lance grasps in the dark.  

“Hmmm, yeah, that is the rumor, but then why would they divorce?” Hairy Red counters.

“It’s the alcohol!” Blue Rat says.

“The drugs!” Hairy Red responds.

“Did you hear about Madia?” Rose Gold interrupts.  

“No, I haven’t, girl, lay it on me,” Lance responds, hating himself a little bit for how easy this is.

“She is…having money problems!” Rose Gold says excitedly, tapping him on the arm.

“After selling so much? I mean, her movies are classic,” Hairy Red says suspiciously.  

“Yeah but she spends so much. I hear she has vacation homes on four different planets. FOUR!” says Rose Gold.

“I just don’t see why you would need more than like, one vacation home. Your regular house and one vacation home,” Lance muses.  

“Yes! You can’t even use four! And imagine the taxes and upkeep!” Hairy Red says.

“Plus, it isn’t like she has had a hit in a long time,” Rose Gold responds.

It is actually sort of fun to sit and gossip with these aliens, but Lance shakes himself out of it. He realizes he needs to focus on getting some actual information.

“So, what do you guys think about Zarkon?”

It is probably pretty graceless, but he isn’t known for subtlety exactly. He hopes he hasn’t made some sort of faux pas. Thankfully, they look thrilled with the question.

“I heard he is sick,” Hairy Red leans forward, whispering.  

“I mean, he is really old,” Lance responds.

“I heard he is heartbroken because his wife died,” Blue Rat adds.  

“She died like, 10,000 years ago come on,” Hairy Red hisses, looking back at Blue Rat.

“But still!” Blue Rat responds.

Rose Gold leans over and smirks. “I think all of you are wrong. Do you hear what you just said? 10,000 years?”

“Well, he has druids helping him…” Hairy Red says.

“Yeah but consider this. Zarkon. Doesn’t. Exist.” Rose Gold states, slamming her hands down on the table.  

“What??” Lance can’t help himself from responding with genuine surprise.

“Come on, who lives for that long? I think he died a long time ago and they are just keeping the idea of him alive to keep everyone in line. He is like a symbol or something. I mean, how many people have ever met him?” Rose Gold whispers furiously.

“It is a big universe!” Blue Rat responds.

“Why doesn’t he make more public appearances? I don’t think he has been seen in person for like, 3 years!” Rose Gold counters.

“He is old! And busy!” Hairy Red snaps back.

Lance reels. He isn’t sure how much he should ask without outing that he is actually an outsider. Zarkon had a wife? Somehow they knew he was sick, or incapacitated.

“How did his wife die?” He finally asks. “I mean, I have heard rumors but I wasn’t sure.”

“In childbirth,” Rose Gold responds immediately.  

“No, I heard she was murdered after giving birth,” Blue Rat adds.

“I heard she committed suicide,” Hairy Red states.

“They say he never loved another,” Blue Rat clasps her hands here, looking softly off into the distance.

Lance grasps, trying to think of what the correct next question would be. Should he ask her name? Run this by Allura later? Was the supposed child Lotor? It is weird that their gossip about Zarkon seems centered around his broken heart and not something more…political.

“Is that why he wants the universe?”

“Some say he wants to give the universe to her even in death,” Blue Rat croons.  

“No, you guys are wrong again. He is a puppet,” Rose Gold snaps.

“A puppet for?” Lance prods.

“The druids, especially Haggar. Come on, it’s not like Zarkon is actually the one in control here. If he even exists.” Rose Gold sounds annoyed now.

“Do you guys agree with what they are doing?” Lance gently lobs the question out there, again hoping he sounds casual.   

“What do you mean?” Hairy Red asks.

“Like…controlling the universe,” Lance clarifies.  

“Oh, well, whatever. It doesn’t really matter to us which rich person is in power over another rich person. Isn’t it all the same?” Rose Gold shrugs casually.

“I mean, the Galra are pretty terrible though,” Hairy Red throws out.

“They are brutes but like, anyone else would be the same, right?” Blue Rat adds.  

“Yeah but like…” Hairy Red starts.

“It doesn’t really affect us,” Rose Gold interrupts.  

“More war would hurt more people…” Blue says, a question in her voice.

“They have literally killed entire species,” Hairy Red snorts angrily.

“But those species fought back,” Rose Gold says.

“Wouldn’t you do the same if they tried to hurt your people?” Hairy Red says angrily.

The tone of the table changes pretty abruptly and Lance realizes that, much like gossip, political discussions are also pretty similar across the universe. He also marvels at how casually at least two of them are able to justify the deaths of living beings, even entire species. It doesn’t seem malicious though. It sounds removed, like the deaths and destruction aren’t real, not in the way that they are for Lance or the others who had seen it firsthand.

“Ug, you know we will always disagree on this, Raph. Plus, wouldn’t some say the Galra helped unite the world?” Rose Gold asks.

“No, that is such an ignorant…” Hairy Red begins.

“You guys, can’t we just have a nice night for once?” Blue Rat interrupts.

The tension dissolves a bit as they look at each other and laugh nervously.

“What about Voltron?” Lance doesn’t want to let the subject go completely though.

Rose Gold squeals a bit, grabbing Lance’s hand excitedly.  

“Ok, Lancius, we will tell you this, but you have to keep calm. Ok?” Rose Gold says, leaning close to his face.  

“I will try…”

“Voltron…is real!!” Rose Gold shouts, staring at him in anticipation.

Lance pauses for a moment before realizing that he is supposed to be shocked.

“Oh my god!”

“Yes, it is real! Can you believe it? We thought it was like Santa Claus or something. But, it actually exists!” Hairy Red states.

“So, isn’t Voltron supposed to bring peace and freedom and all that to the universe?” Lance says.

“Yes, it is supposed to free everyone from the Galra. They already have alliances with a few species out there. I think change is coming,” Hairy Red affirms.  

Rose Gold rolls her eyes. Blue Rat looks bored.

“So, who pilots Voltron? Aren’t there supposed to be like…Paladins or something?” Lance sips his drink, trying not to seem too interested.

He sees Blue Rat perk back up though.  

“A 10,000 year old Altean princess is supposedly leading it. I am not sure I believe that one. I mean, come on, there are limits here. I can believe Voltron is real, but an Altean? A 10,000 year old Altean? Ridiculous.” Rose Gold states.  

“Right. What about the paladins though?” Lance responds.

“There are five. The black one, remember? That one is supposed to the leader, in the myths you know. He is actually arena-bred,” Rose Gold says.

“Arena-bred?” Lance asks.

“Uh, yes, aliens created just for use in the arena?” Hairy Red says it in a tone that indicates that he should have known what that means.

“I know what that word means! I didn’t think a paladin would be that though,” Lance responds.  

“He is. Or was. He might be dead now. They called him The Champion though. He was supposedly a terrifying monster in the arena,” Hairy Red says.

“Yes, just horrifying, no mercy shown for anyone, a beast!” Blue Rat exclaims.

“I heard that he killed guards sometimes when they tried to drag him back to his cell,” Rose Gold says.  

“I heard he attacked the audience one time!” Hairy Red adds.

Lance winces. It is harder than he could have predicted to hear them talk about Shiro that way. Shiro hadn’t exactly opened up a lot about the arena and he certainly wasn’t born just for the arena. But, he gets that you probably don’t get the nickname “The Champion” surviving in a place like the arena without being somewhat savage. He has no idea what it was like for Shiro, what he experienced, the hell he was thrown into. Maybe he did attack the audience or kill a guard. Could anyone blame him? It seems so demeaning to talk about Shiro in this manner though.

“What about the others?” Lance moves on, understanding that he isn’t going to change people’s minds about Shiro in one night of gossip at a bar.

“The yellow one is a star-crossed lover, I heard,” Blue Rat says.  

Lance vaguely knows what that phrase means, but he doesn’t think it applies to Hunk any more than calling Shiro a beast.

“Yes, fell in love on some distant planet, but her family disapproves. So now he saves the universe in hopes of one day winning her hand,” Rose Gold clarifies.

 _Well, that is close actually_ , Lance thinks.

“If they won’t give him her hand, he is going to kill them all,” Blue Rat pipes up, looking pleased.  

Lance has to stop himself from laughing at the idea of Hunk murdering a girl’s entire family just to claim her. He is more likely to cook them delicious food and suck up to them until they gave in. Or, you know, they would just get married anyway because Hunk would let the girl make her own decisions about her life and body, including the decision to be with him or not, regardless of what her family says.

“Then the green one. I heard she is like, 12 years old but one of the most dangerous paladins. She is also trying to get a criminal out of the Galra prisons. Good luck with that!” Rose Gold snorts.

“The criminal is a murderer too of a high-ranking Galra too. No way will she get him out.” Hairy Red adds.

 _Don’t bet against Pidge,_ Lance thinks.

“Then the red one,” Rose Gold raises her eyebrows.

They all exchange a knowing glance here.

“What about him?” Lance asks warily.  

“He is a player,” Rose Gold declares.

Lance knows what that word means on Earth, but thinks it must have a different space meaning especially if they are referring to Keith. Or maybe they mean he plays games which is untrue, but Lance would believe over the other meaning.  

“Yes, he uses his position in Voltron to sleep around. I heard he slept with a princess on one planet and caused quite the scandal,” Hairy Red says.

“No, no that isn’t true,” Lance responds without thinking.

“I heard he got one pregnant and then stopped returning her calls!” Blue Rat adds, waving her arm excitedly.  

“Keith would never do that!” Lance says, probably a bit too loudly.

They all pause and stare at him.

“Keith? Is his name Keith? Do you know him?” Rose Gold asks.

“Uh…I met him…during a meet and greet. He was nice and not a man whore. I didn’t know he was the red paladin though because…I didn’t know Voltron was real…yeah…” Lance fumbles.  

“Well, no one said he isn’t nice. Just that he sleeps around,” Blue Rat rolls her eyes at him.  

Lance isn’t having fun anymore.

“And then the blue one…”

He cringes and really does not want to hear what types of rumors are circulating about him. Though, perhaps not having any rumors would be even worse than inaccurate rumors.

“I heard the blue one is in love with someone from their home planet,” Rose Gold says.  

“Yes, but that person doesn’t love him back,” Hairy Red adds.

“So tragic!” Blue Rat exclaims.

“So he joined Voltron to forget, but he just can’t,” Rose Gold says.  

“Tragic! And romantic,” Blue Rat grasps her hands together and sways a bit, eyes soft.

“They say he flirts a lot, but he never means it. You know, it is just to hide his broken heart,” Hairy Red adds.

Lance wants to disappear.

“I heard he is handsome, but my sister met him at some thing and says that he is somehow arrogant and insecure. One of _those_ guys,” Rose Gold adds.

“Give him a break, his _heart_ is _broken_ ,” Blue Rat says.

Lance wants to puke. Why couldn’t he have some cool narrative like Hunk or Pidge or hell, even Keith’s seems cool in a bad boy way. Why did he have to be the pathetic heart-broken one?

He is ready to leave when he remembers that there is one obvious person he hasn’t asked about yet, kicking himself for not doing it while discussing Zarkon.

“How does Lotor fit into all of this?”

There was a long moment of silence. Every face falls.

“Lotor? Oh, Lotor is a great man. Everyone likes Lotor,” Rose Gold says.

“Yes, he is a good person and a great warrior and so handsome,” Blue Rat adds.

“I heard he is a great leader too and the one actually running the universe,” Hairy Red states.

Lance narrows his eyes.

“Come on, no dirt on him?”

“Everyone loves Lotor,” Rose Gold says. They stare at him. Lance shifts his weight uncomfortably.  

“Yes, he is a great warrior and leader. Gorgeous too,” He finally says, slowly.

Every face brightens.

“Yes, that’s Lotor!”

Lance shudders and suddenly wants to be very far away from his new friends. He states that he is tired and needs to go. He exchanges frequencies with them on the new tablet that Allura gave him, putting in their correct names, but also the easy-to-remember descriptions of them. By the time he arrives back at the Castle, he already has a text about some casting drama on some alien TV show from Rose Gold.

Lance debriefs Allura later, leaving out some of the gossip about his broken, pining heart and Keith sleeping around though telling her that much of the gossip surrounding Voltron has to do with their love lives.

She is confused about the Zarkon gossip, not knowing him to have a wife or child or pregnant wife that died. He tells her of their conflicting ideas about Voltron and the Galra and how they didn’t think she exists.

“That was actually fun, Allura, even though I don’t think I got good information for you.”

“But you did! It is important to keep a finger on how people feel about things in the universe and you managed to befriend them. It may seem like idle gossip, but there are always useful tidbits too for understanding people. For example, it doesn’t seem like they are loyal to Zarkon, exactly?”

“No, not at all. Some think that Galran rule is ok, but others don’t. They don’t seem to worship Zarkon by any means though.”

She nods.

“Thank you Lance. Keep in contact with them and let us know if anything important comes up.”

Lance trudges to the lobby where he finds Keith, the alleged player, alone and sprawled across one of the couches. He snorts back some laughter at the idea, especially as he walks in on Keith awkwardly scratching his armpit, not exactly looking smooth or sexy. 

 _Yes, a modern day_ _lothario_ , Lance thinks to himself sarcastically.  

Keith is huddled smiling over his new tablet. All of them had one now, issued by Allura and Pidge. The tablets help with information and communication. Normally, Lance would be thrilled to have basically a new cellphone, but right now he is just annoyed because Lotor seemed a little too eager to get Keith’s frequency (they operated under frequencies, not really phone numbers like on Earth). He even sent a text while still in the same room “just to make sure it sends.”

“Hey, Keith,” Lance says, looking over his shoulder.  

“Lance. How did the mission go?”

“Allura seems happy. I don’t feel like I did much though.”

“I’m sure you did,” Keith says, bringing a red drink up to his lips.

“What is that?” Lance asks.

“Lotor sent us over some juice from some weird tree. It is supposedly a delicacy. Tastes like apple juice. Look, he color coded them too. Yours is in the fridge.” Keith smiles and Lance is vaguely annoyed.   

Lance peeps at the screen while Keith drinks and, sure enough, sees Lotor’s name.

“Are you free afterward?” Lotor’s last text reads.

“Why is Prince Dickweed asking if you are free?”

“His name is Lotor and he is giving us a conductor machine thing. The one we need to find Shiro. Like, he has one that he is just giving us so we don’t need to look for parts and I don’t need to soul bond or whatever. Isn’t that amazing?”

“So amazing!” Lance responds sarcastically.

“I know you don’t like him, but we don’t have to like him to benefit from being allies with him.”

“But you do like him.”

Keith sits up slowly, staring at him with a strange look on his face.

“You sound jealous.”

“I’m not! You are!”

“That doesn’t even make sense. Are you jealous? But why…”

“Listen, I just think we need to be careful, ok? This is Zarkon’s son. I don’t trust him just because he is being nice to us. What if this is all a trick or a trap?”

“I know. I will be careful.”

“ _We_ will be careful.”

Keith eases back down onto the couch, looking up at Lance carefully.

“He is also working with Pidge to help her find Matt, isn’t that great?”

“Yes, yes it is, if he can help.”

And it is. Lance hates Lotor, but he recognizes that they may be able to use him anyway. Lance forces himself to smile because Keith looks genuinely happy, like a weight has been taken off his shoulders. And Lance isn’t going to ruin that for Keith or for Pidge, at least not until he has to.

“We have a mission on Planet Zirga coming up. Allura said it will be an easy one. Then, we are going to meet Lotor back down on Oytd to get the conductor. Think about it Lance. Maybe we will have Shiro back in a few days!”

Lance can’t help genuinely smiling back at Keith.

“Yes, it will be great to have Shiro back.”

One easy mission, one more meeting with Lotor, and then smooth sailing from here on out. It is as easy as that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: The Paladins go on an easy mission where nothing happens or goes wrong at all


	13. We Pray to a Ghost that We've Never Met

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some lion talk and then trying to solve the mystery of the disappearance of an entire species

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have decided to start posting about this fic and my fic writing in general on tumblr. This was partially motivated by one of my friends making fun of me for not doing it already since apparently everyone does :p So you can follow me here-
> 
>  
> 
> <http://furiouskanekicollector.tumblr.com/>
> 
>  
> 
> I usually just use Tumblr to look at stuff so I have like, very few followers and I mostly just reblog Voltron stuff. But, now I will also update my fic there and, of course, if you want to contact me there to talk about anything Voltron or any of my fics/writing I will be thrilled. I am serious-you can never bother me!

 

There is still something that will never feel right about slipping into the black lion or trying to form Voltron without Shiro. And Keith knows he is the problem every time they try to form Voltron and fail or succeed, but the connection is only shaky.  

Allura and Blue have somehow hit it off. She asks Blue’s permission before every flight, thanks Blue after every flight, and strokes the lion’s paw like it can actually feel it. And Keith guesses maybe she can feel it. The lions **are** sentient. They are cute together and Keith feels faint glimpses of Blue’s happiness at being able to help Voltron and the Princess in this way. He hears Allura constantly praising Blue for every little thing. It isn’t the connection that Lance has with Blue, but it works.

More annoying is how much Lance and Red seem to like each other. Some rough spots initially somehow transition into the most obnoxious combination known to man, designed just to annoy Keith. He can feel Red laughing when Lance calls him out or makes fun of him for something. Occasionally, they will team up just to annoy him in training exercises, Lance and Red darting in front of him suddenly, cutting him off or racing ahead of him, firing back about how slow he was. One time Keith swears Red lands in front of him and Black, bends down, and flicks her tail at them as a taunt. Lance’s hysterical laughter makes Keith grind his teeth in frustration.

Keith had gone to Red once or twice since the lion switch happened because, ultimately, this is still his lion. She seemed amused for lack of a better word. She also seemed to enjoy that he was struggling with Black.

He gets the impression that Red wants him to know that he is still her Paladin, that she knows he is struggling without her, even if she is doing just fine without him.  

And his lion is correct. It is him and Black that are the problem in the equation here. While he is allowed in Black, she doesn’t embrace him. When he is inside her, it is often just like riding his hover bike. Which, he loves his hover bike. He spent many nights working on her alone at the shack, talking to her when there was no one else.

But, ultimately his hover bike is just a bike. A pile of metal. Cold and unmoving when not in use.  

Red is a living being, one that connects with him in a way that he never imagined possible. She talks to him. Barriers break down and they feel what the other feels without even needing to talk. It is intimate and everything that he isn’t getting from Black.

Yet, somehow even with this disconnect, it is also exhausting to fly Black. Allura mentioned once in passing that Black demands the most energy from its pilot and he feels that intensely after he flies her. Sometimes, he has to stop for a moment and rest before exiting Black, unwilling to let the others see him struggling to walk or being a little dizzy from a flight that would have been easy in Red.

He wonders if Shiro felt this way, but also realizes that it probably wouldn’t be as bad if Black had fully accepted him. She probably likes Shiro more since Shiro is the true black paladin. Or maybe Shiro is just stronger than he is.   

It is frustrating though because this is one of the ways they are supposed to be able to find Shiro. He needs to be able to bond with Black. Even after several attempts to bond, he still feels tolerated rather than respected by Black though.

Being in Black does let him feel the other Paladins more than usual though. He wonders if it was always this way with Shiro too even though he never admitted it. Allura is cool and refreshing and somehow silver. Pidge oozes intelligence somehow, but always with an undercurrent of worry and panic. _Her family_ , Keith thinks. She hides it well, most of the time, but he understands better now how they must weigh on her mind every moment of the day.  

Hunk is happiness rolled into a lion, just a steady current of steadfast affection and acceptance with the occasional tinge of fear.

And Lance. Lance is something unidentifiable most of the time, streaks of red and purple, intense, and sometimes even bordering on something that makes Keith’s pulse race.

It is completely different from the impressions Keith felt before of Lance when Lance was still in the blue lion and they were newer to Voltron. Lance had always been a flickering current connecting them all, amusement and bravado wrapped in one package. He had never been what Keith feels now.

Which, Lance is an attractive guy. Keith has eyes. But, he wonders where exactly these impressions are coming from and if anyone else is picking up on them, because then he would have to die of embarrassment. It isn’t like Lance would ever actually be interested in Keith. He is a bit out of Keith’s league anyway. Or maybe not out of his league, but he assumes Lance wants someone more like himself. Happy, outgoing, social, not used to living in a shack.

Plus, he somewhat suspects that these confusing feelings are his stupid lion punishing him for leaving her. He wouldn’t put it past the red lion to torture him in this way, to make him feel what can only be described as passion toward his friend.

It is a dirty trick.    

Either way, Keith wants things to go back to normal.

Lotor looms like a light at the end of the tunnel for Keith. Not only is he also part-Galra just like Keith, but he also swears to Keith that he can help get Shiro back. He is giving them the machine that might make Keith’s need to bond with Black disappear. Keith wants to believe it so badly. He knows he should be holding the prince at arm’s length, but talking to him seems so easy. They had chatted off and on using their tablets since that first meeting. He asks more questions about being a mixed species Galra, but they also discuss other things like food Keith misses from Earth and weapons. Lotor wants to try gravy and funnel cakes. He also likes blades just like Keith. He is nice and supportive and always seems to put Keith at ease, which is a different type of experience for Keith and socializing.

It is also nice having someone to talk to that is outside of Voltron.

In short, Keith is ready to finish things. To find Shiro. To go back to Red. For Lotor to help them win this war for good. But, the first step is completing the next mission with the lions, Black still distant and untouchable as Keith flies her.  

Allura briefs them on this mission on the way to the planet, showing them images of the species they are trying to help called Darsies. They look like what alien lovers on Earth would affectionately call “grays.” Keith briefly wonders if they have ever been to Earth, creating the standard alien stereotype.

They are cuter though. The distorted head and creepy faces on most Earth visions of aliens are absent. The faces are a bit more proportional with a softer expression.

Allura speaks positively of them. She says they are nice aliens, not a lot to give, but always polite and friendly. Her dad had been particularly fond of a type of food they made from moss here and they would visit for vacations sometimes just so he could eat it. She seems protective of this species and notes that the distress signal is actually fairly recent. She theorizes that the Galra might have just found their planet.

The planet is immediately unsettling just because it looks the most like Earth out of any planet they had visited yet. The descent down to the planet could have been them going home, visually. It reminds Keith of those images he had seen as a child of pictures astronauts had taken of Earth. He isn’t as tied to Earth as the others, but even his chest tightens up a bit thinking about it.

When they land and get out, he notes that Lance is very carefully not looking at any of them.

They have landed near what Allura calls the main hub of the planet which is a small city. As they walk toward the buildings, Keith notices how quiet it is. It is really quiet and not in the peaceful way that Keith sometimes enjoys. There is usually some sound no matter where you are. A bird chirping, some wind blowing, a truck in the distance. Even in the shack, he would hear owls at night or the occasional coyote. The creaking of the wood under his feet. Garrison vehicles at times. In the mountains while looking for the blue lion, he hears the echoes of the cave as he climbed in it, running water just out of sight.

This silence is unnatural though. He feels goosebumps under his armor. As they walk into the city, Keith notes that this is, indeed, much like Earth and wonders if the two species had interacted at some point. The architecture is a different style than he knew from American cities. A bit more modern, the shapes a bit different, and everything a bit smaller. But, really, it is like what an Earth city would look like if humans averaged about a foot shorter than they are and had more flair for architecture. Maybe an Australian city since he heard they have more adventurous architecture in some of their cities.

It would be interesting except for the fact that the unnatural silence blankets them all. No one talks as they walk down a sidewalk, looking at small buildings that Keith guesses would be small government buildings like a DMV.

He immediately hones in on what else seems wrong. There is no one, no movement, nothing. There are space cars on what look like fairly normal roads, but it is like everyone disappeared suddenly and never came back. Some of the cars look like they ran off the road straight into buildings. Some are just stopped in the road. It vaguely feels like some of the post-apocalyptic films that Keith had seen.

“This…this is wrong,” Allura says, confused. They try yelling into some of the buildings, but no one answers. They come across a little neighborhood of houses a bit further up the road that, again, could be a foreign Earth city to a small population. Little houses with little yards. One of the yards has what looks to be a pinwheel, eerily still in the front yard. Another one has a flag hanging off their house.

Allura knocks on one of the doors. No one answers. They knock on the next door. No one answers. One of the doors is slightly ajar and she enters the house, followed by the other paladins.

The house is small. They enter the living room while Allura calls out for any life. There is a TV and several places to sit. An open book is on a stand next to one of the chairs.

Keith steps into the next room that has a dinner table and feels nauseous immediately. There are plates on the table with food, little green triangles and a pile of something that could have been mashed potatoes.  However, all of it is rotting, the smell reaching Keith as he gets closer. There are little cups with blue liquid next to each plate and wilted flowers in a vase in the middle of the table.

“Ok, this is officially creepy,” Hunk says from behind him.

“It wasn’t creepy from the beginning?” Keith asks.

“It was, but now it’s creepy creepy,” Hunk responds.

He sees Lance walk over to a board on the wall in the dining area where there is a little crayon drawing of 4 gray aliens with unsure lines. He trails his fingers across it.

“I  think the planet is haunted,” Lance says.  

“Everyone seems to be gone, but if there were an attack or an evacuation we should see some sign of it…” Allura muses from the living room still.  

“Haunted? I think it is more like a zombie movie, Lance.” Pidge says, picking up one of the little cups from the table.  

“Zombies?” Hunk squeaks.

“Yeah, like we are going to turn a corner and see a boarded up door with “Don’t Open, Dead Inside” written on it,” Pidge says.

“Zombies???” Hunk’s voice is increasing in pitch.

“Even if there are zombies we need to keep looking. I am sure there is some explanation,” Keith responds, hoping he can cut off the growing fear before it becomes a problem.  

“Like zombies that want to eat our brains,” Lance snorts.

The buildings in the heart of the city are equally as empty. They enter an office building that is the same as the neighborhood. Papers on desks, rotting food on a plate near a computer, and silence. Always the silence.  It isn’t like a bomb went off though. The city looks abandoned to time, rather.

“Maybe they all just evacuated really suddenly?” Lance says, breaking the oppressive silence.

“Let’s go check their airport,” Allura says quietly.

They walk down the road, avoiding cars and bikes that look abandoned in mid-use.  They reach the airport and enter the clearly abandoned building.

“All of their ships are still here, in disrepair,” Allura announces after walking the length of the entire building. “I mean, it doesn’t mean that they didn’t leave some other way, but something doesn’t feel right.”

 _There are no bodies,_ Keith notes but doesn’t say out loud. He is assuming if there was some sort of mass slaughter there would be bodies or some evidence of it happening. A struggle of some sort. He wonders if there was some type of bomb, a weapon of mass destruction, set off. However, he cannot fathom a weapon that would just disappear an entire civilization without leaving bodies or more evidence of the weapon being used. Even the Galra, as technology advanced as they are, seem to leave much evidence of their presence wherever they go.

They pass a fountain at the edge of the city that would have been beautiful if not for the lack of water. The sprawling fountain looks like it had just been shut off for maintenance and that, at any moment, it could be turned back on. Keith sits at the end of it for a moment and imagines a vibrant city life centering around this big fountain with tons of little gray Darsies living life. The emptiness feels tremendous to him, like it is threatening to overtake everything.

It isn’t until they are closer to the edge of the city where there are trees and, in the distance, mountains that Keith sees something move. He grabs Hunk who is beside him.

“Hey…everyone stop…do you see that?”

Hunk clutches back at him. “Keith, I swear to god if you are trying to scare me right now…”

“I’m not trying to scare you I honestly see…”

He sees movement through the trees again and can’t stop himself from gasping. The atmosphere must be getting to him.

“Who is being a chicken now?” Lance taunts him, but his shaking voice takes the bite away from the insult.  

Keith sees something or someone running away in the distance. He breaks off running after them without thinking, entering the tree line, crashing through a clearing, kicking the overgrown brush out of the way, before coming up on a Darsy.

A terrified looking Darsy who stops, kneels, and covers its head with its arms when Keith crashes up on him.

“Please don’t hurt me!” it screams pathetically.  

“Hey…we aren’t going to hurt you!” Keith says, grabbing the trembling alien’s shoulder.

“Don’t kill me!” the small alien screams, cowering and covering its face.

Keith backs up and takes a deep breath.

“Hey, it is ok. We are here to help. We are Voltron. I’m a paladin.”

“And I am Princess Allura of Altea, here to help your people,” Allura says, coming up behind him with the others.

Allura kneels beside the terrified alien and works her magic. She seems built to soothe and Keith guesses that is partially because of her role as a princess. She is meant to forge connections, to bring people together.

The Darsy finally calms down, standing up at about the height of Pidge.

“You are here to help? Can we get my wife and then we can talk?”  

And sure enough, through another clearing stood another little Darsy, this one smaller, but just as fearful until Allura holds her hand and comforts her. They learn that the taller, first alien is named Gust. The second, smaller one is named Tulip.

They all take a rock in the middle of what looks to be a campsite and look at the two small aliens who are still shivering just a bit.

“We were on vacation,” Gust starts.  

“Yes, a vacation,” Tulip adds.  

“We never had a honeymoon you see.”

“Money problems.”

“So I got a bonus at work.”

“A big bonus!”

“And we decided to go on a tour of our galaxy.”

“It was beautiful, a lovely trip.”

“and then we came home.”

“A taxi dropped us off.”

“Everyone was gone.”

“Everyone!”

“We have a home of course. We lived with our grandparents and my sister.”

“But the house was empty.”

“We checked everywhere, but everything was empty!”

“Completely empty!”  

“We could have stayed at our house, but we were afraid to do that.”

“We tried calling for help, but our electrical systems are down since no one is working at the plant.”

“And neither of us can fly a ship.”

“We did find a way to send a distress signal.”

“We didn’t actually think anyone would answer though!”  

“Did you see anything? Anything suspicious?” Allura asks.

“No, other than everyone being missing.”

“What do you think happened here?” Allura asks them.  
“We have no idea!”

“Do you think this is the Galra?” Keith asks.

“This doesn’t look like them. They would either enslave the planet or take some prisoners. Not disappear an entire species,” Allura responds.

“The Galra aren’t interested in us anyway. They passed us over because we have no real resources and we aren’t a threat,” Gust adds.  

“We are scared. Everyone is gone, our families, everyone,” Tulip moans.

“How long ago did you come back?” Hunk asks.

“A hundred years or so?” Tulip says, looking at Gust for confirmation.

“You have been sitting here for a hundred years?” Pidge asks.  

“Darsies experience time a bit differently from most of us. I believe 100 years would be more like a week or two,” Allura clarifies.  

“We also don’t have anywhere else to go. This is our home!” Gust exclaims.  

The smaller of the two timidly clutches Allura’s hand.

“I…I might have seen something though. I think. I was hunting for mushrooms to eat when I thought I saw something near the mountains,” Tulip says quietly.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Gust asks.

“Those caves are dangerous and I didn’t want you going in there and I knew that you would!” Tulip responds.

“Well, I guess the mountains are our next step then,” Keith says, standing up. He wants to finish whatever they need to do here and leave. The quiet, the stillness of the planet is disturbing him in ways he doesn’t even understand. He almost would rather there be a fleet of Galra for them to attack over whatever this is.

They make their way to a small mountain with a dark entrance. Pidge looks at one of her little devices and says that she is not picking up any lifeforms at all.

“We should at least check,” Allura responds.  

They move together as a group, walking into a large cave. It is a huge cavern with high, damp walls. There are several paths, little openings to lead further into the mountain. The paladins spread out, looking for a sign of anything. Gust walks with Keith, a determined look on his little gray face while Tulip still holds Allura’s hand.  

Lance knocks on one of the walls and screams hello, earning him a dirty look from Keith and Allura.  

There is a moment of silence before they hear a voice in a language they don’t understand ringing out. Everyone freezes. It seems to be coming from everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Then, suddenly, the cave trembles and the ground splits. Keith grabs Pidge, dragging her backward just as rocks fall from the ceiling, slamming into the ground.

There is a brief moment before the floor itself seems to give out. Keith braces himself, but ultimately all he can do is fall down and down and down into the darkness.

When the dust settles, he realizes he is in a much darker, smaller cavern that he would guess is beneath the one they were just in. He sees that Pidge, Lance, and Gust are with him. All of them are groaning, standing up and dusting themselves off, but otherwise seemingly uninjured.

Tulip, Allura, and Hunk are nowhere to be seen.

“Allura? Hunk? Are you guys ok?” Keith says, using his helmet.  

“Yes, we are fine and Tulip is with us and also fine,” Hunk answers. They can hear Tulip in the background, yelling for Gust.

“What do we do, Allura?” Keith asks.

Gust trembles at his side, still looking determined, but obviously scared.

“That voice…” she answers, sounding choked.  

“Why are you here?” A voice they didn’t recognize speaks to them. It is the same loud voice as before, seemingly coming from every angle at once except now they can understand it.  

“We mean no harm,” Lance cries out.

“We want to help!” Keith says.

“Help? All I want to do is be left alone.”

“Ok, we will just leave then if you will show us the exit!” Pidge yells.

“Paladins?” Allura says over the comm.

“What is it, Allura?” Keith answers.  

“That thing that is speaking right now…”

“Allura…”

“It’s a god!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: The god is an asshole
> 
> I am actually really excited about the next two chapters and things start to get a bit more serious from here on out.


	14. You Would Not Believe Your Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Paladins face the god's wrath and perhaps should keep their mouths shut sometimes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning-I changed "canon typical violence" to "some violence"-it won't matter in this chapter, but future chapters are becoming more violent than I thought they would. It isn't like, graphic graphic (on a scale from 1 to Tokyo Ghoul) but if you have any concerns just let me know. I will trigger warning anything too explicit/specific in the beginnings of chapters. 
> 
> Also, I may raise the rating from Mature to Explicit just because Lotor is NOT wanting to stay just "Mature." I actually considered making this a series with a Part 2 because Lotor comes in at Chapter 16, never leaves, and changes the tone a lot and shit gets real where I feel like a lot of this has been lighter so far. We will see lol. 
> 
> My influences/inspirations for this chapter are too numerous to name-it is inspired partially by the Voltron Comics, but also I love pretty much any time any character has to do three trials or survive booby traps or whatever. Like, all the way from myths about Greek gods and heroes to Indiana Jones (which my dad really likes) to Harry Potter to even stuff like Hunger Games (the arenas, particularly the clock/water one and even the booby traps in the Capital).

_* The god's voice for the next two chapters will be in italics_

 

Lance groans, already assuming that anything that calls itself a god will be irritating.

“Uh, ok, a god? What does that mean?” Keith asks.

“Gods are…extraordinarily frustrating.”

_I can hear you_

“We didn’t mean to disturb your slumber. Can you just let us go?” Lance asks.

_No_

“Just no? Really?” Keith responds.

“Did you do something to the aliens who lived here?” Pidge asks.

_What aliens?_

Pidge grabs Gust and nudges him forward though none of them knew exactly how the “god” was seeing them.

_Oh. I made them all disappear._

“What? Why? Can we get them back?” Lance asks.  

_No. I needed a new home and this is what I chose._

They all look at each other. Gust looks particularly distraught.  

“He can’t be serious,” Keith says.

“They have to be somewhere,” Pidge says.

“Do we even know that this thing is a god, whatever that means?” Lance asks, putting a hand on Gust’s shoulder.  

_I can still hear you. Why don’t I just disappear you too?_

“Wait,” Allura said. “Challenge him to three trials.”

“Haven’t we already been through this before already with a different “god”?” Pidge asks.  

“Sorry paladins. I have no doubts you will win.”

_But I don’t want to do trials today._

“Too bad. Give us trials. Now,” Lance says.  

“Let’s do this,” Pidge responds. 

_Fine._

There is an indistinct muttering noise.

“I think we should try to find another way out,” Keith whispers.

_I can hear you even when you whisper_

“Come on, it’s just three trials, we have beauty, brains, and brawn with us, how can we lose?” Lance pokes at Keith.  

“Did you just call yourself the beauty?”

“No, I’m brawn, you are beauty.”

“I’m not beautiful!”

“Your eyelashes are longer than Allura’s.”

“ _Your_ eyelashes are longer than…”

“Boys!” Pidge interrupts, rolling her eyes.

A lit up door had appeared suddenly on the end of the small cavern. There is a bizarre sign floating above the door, saying Spike Trap. They cautiously move into the next room and see that it so long and dark that they cannot see most of the room. There is a long, narrow bridge leading from one side of the room to the next, supposedly. The bridge has a conveyer belt of randomly occurring spikes poking out of the ground and then retracting again. The spikes were long and quickly rose and fell with a sharp metallic noise.

_Each spike will penetrate even the toughest of materials and one drip of the poison will kill you. You must get across without dying. Or whatever._

Pidge knelt on the ground, watching the spikes rise and fall.

“I mean, we can just wing this right?” Keith asks.  

“Yeah, jump over the spikes when they come up?” Lance adds.  

“The pattern is random enough and each section of spikes big and fast enough that I am not trusting either of you to be able to do that without dying like idiots,” Pidge responds.  

“Do you think they can even penetrate our armor?” Lance asks.  

“I mean, do you think they are even poisoned? This god seems lame,” Keith says.  

_I can hear you._

“Ok guys, this won’t be so bad. I think it is following the Fibonacci series.” Pidge stands up finally.  

“Oh yes, the Fibonacci series, of course!” Lance responds.

“What is that, Pidge?” Keith asks.

“Seriously, you guys didn’t learn this in school?” Gust asks, rolling his eyes with Pidge. Lance bristles a bit at the fact that even the alien they are supposed to be saving is dragging them.

“They probably didn’t pay attention,” Pidge answers Gust before turning to Keith and Lance. “The Fibonacci series is a mathematical sequence that shows up in a lot of places, even natural places. You basically start with two ones and then add each of the last two digits to get the next number. I believe the spikes are going up and down based on that pattern. So, the spikes repeat on one, then move to 2, then 3, and so forth. Non-sequence numbers, such as 4, have spikes when the sequence numbers have retracted.”

“Ok, so we are going to have to add numbers while running across this thing?” Keith asks.

“That sounds hard,” Lance moans.  

“From what I can see, it only does the sequence up to 21 and then repeats. I can’t see how much further it goes in the dark, but from what I can see it repeats after the 21. So, just memorize these numbers and run accordingly-  1 1 2 3 5 8 13 21,” Pidge explains.

“1…1…2…” Lance says slowly.

“Oh god. Maybe I can yell the numbers out to you as you run?” Pidge interrupts him, irritated.  

_No. That goes against the rules. No helping_

“Isn’t she helping us now?” Keith asks, ignoring Lance poking him in the ribs.

_Uh. No help once one person has entered the bridge_

“Stupid god,” Pidge mutters.

“Just memorize it. It isn’t bad. 1 1 2 3 5 8 13 21. It’s only 8 numbers,” Gust tells them.  

“1 1 2 3 5 8 13 21.”

“1 1 2 3 5 8 13 21.”

“Ok, see, you guys have this. This is easy,” Pidge says.  

Pidge goes first. They watch as she effortlessly avoids the spikes and then disappears into the dark. Gust goes second and also disappears without an issue.

Lance and Keith rock paper scissor it to see who gets to go next with Lance winning. Muttering the numbers under his breath, he darts across the conveyer belt. The sequence repeats four more times before he finally reaches the other side. It isn’t that bad, except for when the sequence repeats and the separation between the 21 and 1 didn’t give a lot of leeway for mistakes with the fast rising spikes. He finally gets across to greet Pidge and Gust standing on the other side.  

“Now just to wait for…” he starts.

“The beauty?”

“Shut up, Pidge.”

A few moments later Keith finally appeared in the darkness, brow furrowed, running perhaps a bit too fast across the spikes. It is near the completion of the second to last sequence that his face falls and his eyes go wide.

“Keith?” Lance yells.

Panic flashes across his face as he stands still for a moment on the bridge and then suddenly runs and jumps, barely missing being spiked, using his jetpack blaster to get over the last sequence without dying.

“Did you forget the sequence?” Pidge says accusatorily, punching him on the arm after he lands.  

“No. Yes. I was thinking about something else and forgot where I was,” Keith responds.  

“Maybe a poisoned death trap is not the place to think about something else?” Lance jeers.

“We got across isn’t that all that matters?” Gust says.

The little alien seems clearly agitated and Lance tries to remember a random god just told him his entire species had been disappeared.

_Congratulations to our great heroes who know how to figure out basic, simple mathematical sequences that even children know_

“Hey, you are the one who came up with trial!” Lance yells back.

_Whatever_

A new lit up door appears next to them. The sign above this one reads “The Hall of Reflection.”

“I already don’t like this,” Keith mutters before moving through the door.  

They enter the cavern and are immediately bathed in darkness. Lance instinctively grips his bayard, ready to shoot at anything that moves before remembering that what moves might be a friend. He relaxes and reminds himself that it’s a trial and not a battle, at least not yet.  

A moment later, the lights turn on, illuminating a smaller cavern this time. Lance looks at the others who look back at him, equally as confused.

_In a test of how well you know your allies, I have replaced one of you with an exact lookalike. I have also peeped inside your heads so don’t think that basic questions will help you. To pass, you must kill the fake_

“Oh come on, this isn’t fair, we don’t even know Gust how would we know if he was fake?” Pidge yells.

“Likewise, I don’t know them. I can’t even help!” Gust adds.

_Well, I guess you will just have to figure out for sure if one of you three are the fake. Process of elimination, puny mortals_

“Ok, Gust, sit back for a moment. Ok, so let’s start at the basics. How did you two meet me?” Pidge begins.  

“That sounds like a basic question, Pidge,” Lance responds.  

“Why don’t you want to answer it?” Pidge asks.

Lance sighs and crosses his arms. “We met at the Garrison. You were lucky enough to be assigned as my communications officer. We crashed a simulator together.”

“I was saving Shiro when you guys showed up. Then I took you back to my shack,” Keith says.  

“Ok, so the god does have basic knowledge,” Pidge says.  

“Wait, you didn’t answer a question!” Lance exclaims, pointing at her.

“Well, if I am the fake I already know how we met because you guys just told me. Ask me another one.”  

“What was the first major argument we had?” Keith asks.

“I wanted to leave Voltron to find my family and you threw a trantrum,” Pidge responds.  

“Ok, basic knowledge it is then,” Lance muses.  

“Unless it’s Gust and we are all normal,” Keith says.

“Gust, how did we meet?” Pidge asks.

“I saw you at the edge of the city and ran because I was scared. Keith caught up to me,” Gust responds.

“Ok, so….” Lance says.

“This shouldn’t be as hard as it is,” Keith groans.  

“If he knows basic knowledge and facts, he might not know the more subtle behaviors, right?” Pidge asks.   

Lance takes a deep breath. “Ok. Let’s all tell each other how we feel about each other in a way that we normally would.”

“That is gross,” Keith says.  

“Well it could help us,” Pidge says.

“I am over-thinking the part about normal though. Like, it already doesn’t feel normal because we are trying to be normal,” Lance says.  

“We can start there and see if it helps. I’ll go first.” Pidge adjusts her glasses before continuing.  

“Lance, you are a great shot, strategist, and you care about your team. However, your weaknesses are that you are terrible at hand-to-hand combat and your raging insecurities make you emotionally vulnerable. Keith, you are great at close range combat and powerful in battle situations, not to mention your piloting skills. However, sometimes you do not think which can be a detriment. Also, your fear of abandonment has led you to develop a dependence on Shiro and even Voltron itself, both of which can be exploited.”

“Wow.”

“Jesus.” Lance feels exposed.

“But, that’s pretty Pidge-like,” Keith says.

“Yep,” Lance responds. “I will go next.”

“Pidge, I still want to know how you hid the fact that you were a girl and I also can’t wait to kick your ass at that video game. Keith, your lion likes me better than you,” Lance smirks at them.

“Sounds like Lance.”

“But maybe too much like Lance?”

Pidge and Keith scratch their chins, staring at him.

“Maybe we should ask him more questions,” Keith wonders.

“No way, cowboy. You are conveniently avoiding answering the question,” Lance looks at Keith, silently wondering if he seems just a bit off.

“Fine. Pidge, you are ridiculously smart and like my little sister. I never want you to leave Voltron.”

“And Lance.”

Lance makes direct eye contact with him and holds it, waiting for Keith’s next move.

“Lance, you are really cool and a great shot. I will always be a better pilot than you though.”

Lance nods slowly, turning away for a moment.

In his heart of hearts, he knows.

“Keith would never call me really cool to my face, traitorous fake!”

In one fluid motion, he turns around and shoots Keith in the head.

Keith only has a moment to look surprised before collapsing to the ground, unmoving.

There is a moment of silence.

A moment of excruciating, tense silence.

Agonizing silence.  

Pidge looks increasingly agitated, staring at the unmoving body of their teammate.

“Did you guys just kill your actual friend?” Gust asks, shakily.  

“I thought he was the fake too but…” Pidge begins before being interrupted.

Lance feels someone or something fall against him, pushing him into Pidge. Turning, he sees an exact replica of Keith, seemingly pushed out of the wall.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice how fast you were to shoot me, asshole,” Keith snarls at him.  

“Oh thank god!” Lance exclaims, unable to stop himself from hugging the real Keith while watching the fake Keith disappear into a puff of smoke.

“You should have seen the look on your face when you thought you killed your friend,” Gust snorts.   

Pidge smiles, looking up almost as if to find the god.

“It was almost a good trick, but the god could only get a limited view of our brains. While I think he could see facts and maybe even what we think, he didn’t quite see how we act toward one another, our behavior. Humans are complicated you know, our behavior doesn’t always match what we think or feel or make sense given the totality of our experiences. Like, Keith, I know you care about me like a sister, but you wouldn’t say that to my face like that. Even when you were trying to get me to stay with Voltron the second time, after Shiro went missing, you focused on my value as a paladin rather than the emotional stuff. I think you feel more comfortable framing your thoughts around practicality and facts rather than how you feel, probably because…”

“Ok, I get it. That is enough psychoanalyzing me for a lifetime,” Keith responds, pushing past them to walk toward the new door that lit up behind them. “Let’s get this over with…”   

“One more trial and then we can get out of this place, come on guys!” Lance power walks through the door titled “Bear Trap.”

Keith began to follow behind him, but stopped as Pidge grabs his arm.

“So, you think Lance is really cool?”

“What? No.”

“Because the god that saw inside your head…”

“Pidge! We have to concentrate.”

Lance enters the last room which is just as dark as the other rooms.

“Bear trap? So, should we be watching our feet?”

Using the light from their helmets, they look around the dark space, not seeing anything particularly important.

“What is a bear?” Gust asks.

“It is a big furry animal…like…wait, would this god be talking about a regular bear? Like a bear bear?” Pidge responds.  

“Does bear mean something else in an alien language?” Keith asks.  

“Why is it just a dark space?” Lance asks.

“Come on, god, give us our third trial!” Pidge yells.

Lance sees the button on the floor just a second too late. Just a smidge. His weight is already pushing forward on his right foot as it comes down directly onto the button. A beeping noise starts.

“Uh, guys, oops?”

“What is it?” Keith asks.  

Lance can hear something growling. He tenses, bayard ready. Gust backs up against a wall.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, something very heavy slams into Lance from above. He collapses to the ground, banging his head as he falls. Not that this is what matters at the moment. There is something heavy and thrashing on him, growling. Stiff hair enters Lance’s mouth as he struggles to get away. The smell is musky and overwhelming.  

He can hear Keith and Pidge screaming distantly before the thing on him howls and scuttles off. Lance quickly crawls away, panting, staring up at…a bear. An actual black bear in this tiny space.

Keith’s bayard drips with the bear’s blood and he advances, glaring.

“Keith, wait!” Pidge yells. “It is just a bear. Why is there a bear here? It is terrified though. Just…let’s let it go.”

On closer inspection, the growling bear did seem to be in a defensive stance rather than a blood-thirsty one. Lance vaguely remembers reading that black bears are big babies too. The type of bear you want to run into compared to a grizzly or a polar bear. They join Gust who has pressed himself against one of the walls, giving the bear plenty of space. He takes the escape route and the last they see is its short black tail running off into the darkness.

“Really, god? You just dropped a bear on us? That isn’t even that good of a joke,” Pidge yells.  

_Bears are terrifying creatures!_

“You didn’t even pick the right type of bear!” Lance yells.

“We also fight galra. Like, aliens bigger with better weapons and just as vicious,” Pidge points out.   

“I fought Zarkon before! Zarkon!” Keith yells.

“Your trials are lame!” Gust exclaims.

_Fine. You want to make fun of my trials and not take me seriously? I am giving you one more trial- winner takes all._

“Hey that isn’t fair we were told three trials! We won now let us go!” Pidge yells.  

_Gods are allowed to do a sudden death final round. You can ask your princess about that when you leave and she will confirm it. Come on. Join me in the final room. It’s not like I will let you out any other way_

They walk warily toward another lit up door. Lance walks into the room slowly until he suddenly reaches a sharp drop off, his foot hovering in the open space.  

He squeals a little bit and backs up.

_I am resting at the bottom of this cave. The drop off you now face is miles deep. I would not fall off unless you want to die_

“So what is our final test?” Pidge asks.

_I will let all of you go free. No questions asked. Your group and the one I can feel above so worried about you even as I speak. You may go, no strings attached as long as you complete one task._

“And what is that task?” Keith asks.

_You must die_

“What?” Lance screams back.

_One of the beings in your group right now must die. Once they are dead, I will open a pathway for you and the rest may leave. If you do not, I will then kill all of you for failing my final test_

There is a moment of dead silence while they all look at each other.

_Now, who is the lame god?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: Where the fic writer hopes this isn't as predictable as it feels or at least if it is predictable that I put my own stamp on it :p Or, this arc wraps up and some bad? decisions are made. 
> 
> Also, a lot of you followed me on tumblr which was really exciting lol. I think I followed everyone back now. Anyway, I am linking my tumblr again-I am not terribly active, but I will occasionally post about the fic, my writing in general, and also loads of Voltron/Fan art/Lotor right now.
> 
>  <http://furiouskanekicollector.tumblr.com/>


	15. Everything That You Thought I Would Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Keith makes a decision and the god gets the last laugh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is blood in this chapter and some description of a serious wound. Again, it is mostly blood and not horrifically graphic, but I wanted to put a note here just because I had canon typical violence originally in the note forgetting that Voltron is a kid's show that blows people up with no blood somehow :p 
> 
> I am unhappy with the pacing for this fic and I feel like I had a bit too much fun just slowly writing voltron and the lions hunk and klance/laith, but things will be moving much faster now. I am still waffling on whether I want to make this a series just to note the change at this point lol. Also thanks for sticking with me.
> 
>    
> Also, I might literally be dying about all this Season 3 news like I don't even know where to start I am in love with every character and yes I have added a Laith tag :p

Keith registers the words of the god without really taking them seriously. He will find a different way out of this. He always does, they always do. There is always a choice, a good ending, a different path.

With a sigh, he tells the others to start looking around the cavern. They crawl around the dark, small space, careful not to fall down the precipice looking at the far end of the room. Keith is looking for any type of exit, a door, a crevasse, something they can crawl through. Allura had stopped answering her communicator so Keith assumes they are too deep, but all he needs to do is find a way up and out. This feels like a waste of time anyway when they could be finding Shiro or doing any other number of important missions.

There is nothing though, no option for escape except the dark depths below them.

“Do you think we can explore the drop off?” He asks.

“I already did,” Pidge waves a device at him. “Like the god said, it is several miles deep. There could be something I missed, but I don’t think so.”

_You guys are being boring. Come on, try to kill each other._

“We won’t do that, ever, so you might as well just let us go,” Lance answers.

Keith considers just hacking into the side of the mountain with his blade. Or, getting Lance to shoot at it. Surely there was a way to blast through the rock. It isn’t like the god is physically holding them hostage, not really.

It is when he is considering the logistics that Keith feels something whistle by his face, barely missing him before striking the wall behind him. “What the fuck…”

He kneels and picks up a spear. “What is this, god?”

_If you are going to be boring then I have to make things more interesting._

Keith hears the sounds of more weapons, similar spears likely, hitting walls and whistling through the air.

He hears Lance cry out. Grabbing Pidge, he runs them both over to where Lance stands. His arm is bleeding, somehow the armor torn straight through.  

“I hate this god more than any other god I have ever known,” Lance says, grimacing at the pain and gripping his arm.

“Ok, we can do this. It’s just like training. We have each other’s backs and defend against the spears. Gust, stand in the middle.” They are experienced paladins now at this particularly exercise. Keith is confident none of them will get hurt as long as the smaller, defenseless alien stays where they can all defend him. He goes back to considering how to get out of the damned mountain.  

Keith’s thoughts are cut off by one of the spears whistling by him directly toward Lance. He knocks it out of the air before it can hurt the blue paladin. Lance never even sees it coming, trusting Keith enough now to keep his back turned to focus on protecting Pidge.

“We are all going to die…” Gust moans from the middle of the three paladins.

“Ok, we probably won’t _all_ die.” Pidge starts. “This will keep us alive for right now, but we really need to discuss what to do about this last trial though.”

_There is only one thing you can do and that is for one of you to stop breathing._

“Well, gods like riddles and stuff so maybe we can challenge him to a different type of trial?” Lance wonders.

_No. Only death. I want one of you to bleed._

“Maybe we can offer to worship him? Don’t gods like worship?” Gust throws out.

_You can start with a sacrifice._

“What if I try to fight it? I mean, it can’t actually be immortal or a god right?” Keith asks.

_You aren’t getting this are you? One of you is shaking off the mortal coil._

Pidge wards off a spear for Keith, shooting him an exasperated look. “Maybe we can offer him something else, like…”

Keith looks back momentarily and then back to the front where he knocks down another spear. He dimly hears something hit the ground that doesn’t sound like a spear and wonders if the bear is back.

“Like what, Pidge?”

Suddenly, all the whistles of weapons stop and he hears a strangled noise behind him.

He turns and sees Lance and Gust, eyes wide, kneeling beside Pidge. He runs and it still isn’t real. There is always a way out.

But the spear sticking in Pidge’s chest is very, very real. Keith puts his hand on it before it disappears into a puff of smoke.

The hole and blood remain though, coming out in spurts that even Keith recognizes as really bad.

He and Lance put their hands over her chest, trying desperately to stop the bleeding. They make panicked eye contact.

“Ok, ok, ok, we can still do this, it can’t be that bad, hey god, what else do you want? Can I sell my soul to you? Would that be a life? If I throw myself down there right now would you let everyone else go?” Lance screams only to be greeted by silence.

If he listens closely enough, Keith swears he can hear the blood leaving Pidge’s body, currents of red too strong for even his hands to stop. He thinks that if the blood is still flowing that means she is still alive though.

“Come on, what do you really want? Gods are supposed to be nice and forgiving…what do you want? I’ll worship you. Let’s negotiate, hey god…”

Lance is still screaming, but Keith only hears him distantly. His mind is clicking through possible paths, possible solutions, looking at the facts of the situation and making decisions. He feels himself splinter between two halves of himself. The half that tells him that that Pidge is gone and the half that tells him there is still another option. The half that knows that people die sometimes especially in a war and the half that tells him he loves Pidge and cannot bear to lose another person he loves. The half that tells him that, practically, there is nothing he can do now and the half that tells him he will never be able to face Shiro or any other member of Voltron again if he loses Pidge, if she dies in his arms right now.

And this is on him. It is on his shoulders if Pidge dies. It happened on his watch after Shiro entrusted Voltron and the lives of the paladins to him.

_Her heart is still beating. Throw her over the edge and I will let everyone else go as promised._

The cavern begins to shake and tremble. Small rocks followed by bigger ones begin to fall around them.

_Seriously, I am tired. Do it and I will let you go. I want to go back to sleep now._

Keith presses harder against Pidge’s chest, barely registering the words and the rocks. Everything seems to be falling down around him.

“I know it sucks, but we have to get out of here. She would understand! Just let her go!” Gust yells, grabbing Lance’s arm.

Lance is still trying to find a way out, the good end, the hero’s victory, yelling up at the god, bargaining his soul and body.

Keith watches as Pidge’s body stiffens and a full body tremor racks her from head to toe. _Death throes_ , some dim part of his mind supplies him. _This is what happens when something dies,_ he thinks _._

It doesn’t matter anymore though because Keith knows the solution. He knows exactly what he needs to do to fix this. A way out opens before his eyes. There is a sudden peace, a calmness, everything goes quiet even though he can still see Lance yelling and the rocks falling around him.

“Lance,” he yells. “Put your hands here. Keep pressure on the wound.”

Lance does it obediently, looking dazed and shaky, telling him that “he thinks he will be able to talk the god out of it.”

But it’s too late. They don’t have enough time.  

With one, fluid motion Keith stands up, manifests his bayard, and drives it through Gust’s chest. He isn’t sure where the heart would be, but he doesn’t want the alien to suffer and the chest seems like a vulnerable spot on pretty much every creature.

The alien only briefly looks shocked before his wide eyes turn dim and his body goes limp, only held up by Keith’s blade. Keith grabs his now heavy body and throws him over the edge into the darkness.

The trembling cavern and falling rocks stop abruptly. He turns back to see Lance staring at him, mouth open, eyes wide.

A light appears suddenly. The rocks part, creating crude steps leading up to a door that opens. Even from his position now, Keith can see the outside world above them. He can see the sky and clouds. From the precipice, he can hear the god laughing.  

“Paladins? Can you hear me? What is happening?” He hears Allura’s voice ring out once again.

He doesn’t respond. He crouches and pulls Pidge from Lance’s arms. It is much easier to cradle her than it was to cradle Lance back when his biggest worry was a big spider who turned out to be a pet. She is so tiny in his arms and sometimes he can’t believe her brain and battle savvy are somehow packed into such a small frame. She feels like a child at this moment, limp in his arms.  

Then he runs for all he is worth toward the light.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next Time: Lots of talking and fighting including our favorite purple prince making an appearance
> 
> Lotor and his bad ass girl generals god I am going to write the shit out of Lotor. Thank you season 3 stuff!!!!!!


	16. I'm sorry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a chapter, trigger warning for suicide mention.

I have discontinued this version of the fic, but you can read a sort of continuation linked below-Sorry! Read my note below the link for more explanation.

[Bad Romance](http://archiveofourown.org/works/11795799/chapters/26605182)

I never thought I would be that author leaving one of these notes, but some of you have been so unbelievably sweet and supportive I didn't just want to abandon this without explanation. So, I am discontinuing this fic for a few reasons. 

The first is that I feel like I tried to cram too many fic ideas into one and ended up getting really far away from what I wanted to write about with this fic. So, I was toying with the idea of "rebooting" it anyway with a much clearer focus. This will remain up and it isn't that I don't like what I wrote. Just that I feel like I crammed two one shots and three longer fics into one place and it didn't quite work. 

While I was toying with this idea, my dog was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer. I am not exaggerating when I say I am probably alive right now because of my dogs. Can't kill yourself if your dogs need to be walked, right? I am heart-broken. I don't even know how long I have with her, but best case scenario is probably a month, worst case is that she won't make it past the next 2-3 days. Anyway, I am going to spend however long she has left coddling her and letting her know what a good girl she has been. I am not sure how soon I will feel like writing after she passes.  

Anyway, I haven't abandoned this fic idea in general, but I don't have a firm timeline for when the "remix" will come. It will focus on Keith/Lotor because I really like what I want to do with them as characters. It will probably start on Chapter 1 with either the same or really similar conflict as the last two chapters of this fic (Keith kills someone or does something that Lance doesn't agree with during a mission) so that will be similar or the same, but everything else will be new.  

 

Thank you so much for reading, giving kudos, and comments. I hope we will find each other again in the Keith/Lance tag and/or the Keith/Lotor tag. 

 

You can still find me on my tumblr here

<http://furiouskanekicollector.tumblr.com/>

Where, fair warning, the next few weeks will likely cycle rapidly between really depressing shit and Voltron. Maybe both at the same time sometimes. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I am pretty good at tagging things or giving trigger warnings at the beginning of chapters. Let me know if you have any questions though. Thank you for reading! I live and breathe for kudos and comments! Seriously, even a smiley face or random letters from you banging your hand on the keyboard would make me happy.


End file.
